An Unflattering Description of The Museum

The schoolboy, whose name was Tang, held Ageless in a remorseless grip.

Go on, said his friend Dragon d'Or. I bet you can't.

I can, said Tang. I saw Stephen Fry do it on QI last week.

Ageless couldn't believe what he was hearing. He quite liked Stephen Fry.

Tang began to stroke his back from nose to mid point rhythmically. Almost immediately Ageless found he had lost the ability to move.

Tang! called out his teacher. What are you up to over there?

He's found a lobster, miss! said Dragon d'Or.

Bring it here at once, said the teacher. Tang! Did you find this in the Marine Invertebrates Gallery?

No miss, said Tang. It was in here, looking at the fossils.

Don't be ridiculous Tang, said the teacher. It's obviously dead. Wait till Mr Lee has finished his fossil talk, and then we'll hand it in.

Ageless was outraged, but there was nothing he could do.

Mr Lee looked puzzled when he was handed the supine Ageless, and frowned at Tang and Dragon d'Or.

Nevertheless he invited them to come with him to the New Specimens Room, where the lobster could be properly identified.

Soon Ageless found himself flat out on a specimen table. He was starting to get some feeling back in his legs. He sat up. There were several people standing round the specimen table, including Tang, Dragon d'Or, their teacher, Mr Lee and Dr Suzanne Miller.

It's an arthropod, said Dr Suzanne Miller. But somewhat unusual.

I am indeed! said Ageless. And I am not accustomed to being treated in his manner. This would never happen in the library! However, forgive and forget, that's my motto. Now, can ANY of you people tell me where in this hotchpotch rabbit warren of galleries and staircases I might find some TRILOBITES!

Not To Say You Don't Have Holes

Ageless was at the library when he received Kobo's communication. He wrote back straight away.

oooh,,,,clikclik,,,,, dear kobo is it really you and you are not angry with me????
this is my lucky day,,,,,and your lucky day,,,,i am still wanting to kiss you ,,,,but not in a nice way,,,,,i mean not too nice,,,,,,clikclik

sorry kobo i did not mean that sorry,,,,,i was too excited by your words,,,,,i did mean nice,,,,

i will go to the museum for you kobo it is just next door,,,,they have a collection of trilobite fossils there including giant ones,,,,what size eyes do you want??? i will get some for you,,,but it might be hard,,,,they are in a glass case,,,,

i am in the library now,,, i have a book on trilobites,,,,,, they do have calcite eyes that is calcium carbonate,,, how strange,,,,,,,calcium carbonate is transparent in its purest crystalline form,,,,,they could see through their crystal eyes,,,,,,,have you got holes in your head for the calcite eyes dear pretty kobo????,,,,,,have you???? ,,,,,,,,,yes i did see you through the kitchen window you are very,,,,,clikclik,,,,creamy,,,,,but i did not see your holes,,,,that is not to say you don't have holes,,,,,,,i bet you have,,,,kobo,,, clikclik,,,,,

by the way who told you that i saw you??? was it that scallywag baby pierre????,,i'll kill him,,,only joking kobo,,,

i'm busy tomorrow i have to go to something at the university i will tell you all about it next time it's about testing cars for safety by firing heads at them from a yellow machine,,,,i will like it,,,you will like it too,,,,,,oh kobo

kisss kisss clik,,,,,

from ageless lobster!!!

Understandings

Leave the chicken and icecreams with us, said The VeloDrone.

Okay, said the president. Enjoying yourselves?

Mmmm, said Le Bon David, eying the esky.

Yes, said The VeloDrone. All these rocks. It's hard not to.

The president smiled benevolently and wandered off.

You'll note, said The VeloDrone, that I didn't say what would happen to the chicken and icecreams.

Noted, said Le Bon David. Shall we eat them on the train?

We shall, said The VeloDrone. Let's go.

......

Meanwhile Margaret and Gaius were deep in fascinating conversation.

I should very much like to see this Exeloo you speak of, Margaret, said Gaius. And the Contemplation, and the Tjilbruke monument as well. You obviously know a great deal about this coastline.

Oh yes, said Margaret, but it's always nicer to be with someone who appreciates what they're seeing.

I'm sure that David and Vello appreciated what you showed them, said Gaius.

I'm not so sure they did, said Margaret, but I somehow feel that you would. Did you know, she continued, that the fossilised remains of giant red kangaroos have been found inland from the southern end of this beach?

Wonderful, said Gaius. I take it you are interested in fossils?

I am, said Margaret. I am particularly interested in trilobites.

So am I , said Gaius, Did you know that their eyes were made of calcite?

Yes. How good is that, said Margaret.

Not very good I shouldn't have thought, said Gaius.

Margaret giggled.

Gaius understood that she thought he'd made a joke.