Recklessness

oh ageless what a lovely story of the search and rescue, yes ageless i ammm cheered up now

but i ammm still down here dangerously, and i know you do not like pierre ( or do you? ) but she is down here dangerously as well.

this is how, it is not a long story. she tried to help mmme and she tummbled down into the mmmetal bowl, now we are both waiting for a search and rescue.

pierre is pinning all her hopes on the mmmmanifest stone, but i do not believe in it, she is annoying mmme by saying all the timmme ommmmmm.

ommmmm is not the thing to say, if the stone hears it the stone will think she is alright, i think she should say help!

not that i think the stone can hear it, it's a stone. you and mmme agelesss we believe in different things but we are agreed that what pierre believes is stupid.

i know we are. however she is mmy bosommm friend so i ammm praying too but insincerely. ommmmmmm. and in between the ommmmms i'm thinking about going down the hole.

i hear water gurgling down the hole agelesss, water,

you live in the water mmaybe i would find a way to you.

i have not told pierre what i ammm thinking what do you think ageless shall i take a plunge?? i think i will...

your reckless friend,

kobo

Search and Rescue or The Noble Claw

oh no kobo i am not laughing!! distraught is what i am,,,, oh kobo,,,, are you rescued yet?

pierre is just a stone what can she do pray? i mean what can she do? pray?,,,,you know what i mean,,,, oh kobo i wish that i could find you i have not given up,,,,,

the creative lobsterian force that made you laugh and fall into the metallic trough so near the horrid hole,,, it might help you,,,,,,,,let me tell you how creative forces work,,,,,,they do a bad thing followed by a good thing,,, unless they forget to do the good thing,,,,but it could be worse,,,, you have not fallen down the hole,,,,,, how lucky!!!! unless oh no !! you have?

are you cheered up kobo,,,,, are you cheered up now???

i will tell you a story in case you are still frightened,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, or was it bored you said you were????,,,,,,,,either way you will like this story,,,,,,,,it is about a search and rescue kobo,,,,,,,,,

i was at the beach at brighton it was a special day,,,,,swimming races for the humans and food and fun,,,,,, there was a stage and loud music in front of the surf life saving club and stalls and young humans in shorts drinking yellow bubbling drinks from plastic cups,,,,, red and yellow flags and sausages,,,,, and rusty metal sculptures,,,,,,,you could walk around and look at them in the sun and wind,,,

one of the sculptures was called search and rescue,,,,,, it was made of two different kinds of metal,,,,, a tall rusty spanner in the middle and shining metal waves curling round the outside,,,,,but you could not be certain,,,,,the rusty spanner might have been a hand and the shining waves tinsnips,,,,,, or the tinsnips a claw and the hand a sinking clam,,,,,,,,,,you see,,,, it moved me kobo,,,,,,

do you like it kobo? if only it were true,,,,,, if only you could be rescued by the noble lobsterian claw of your true and loyal friend (unlike pierre),,,,,,

ageless

Near the Hole

ageless!! surely you aren't so thick as to believe god is a lobster! or pardon mmme a Creative Lobsterian Force!! ha ha, i amm laughing so much i amm falling off mmmy window sill.

ooh i have fallen off i will have to call pierre mmy bosommmmm friend

pierre! pierre! help mme i have fallen off the window sill!

ohh ageless she is not commming it is sunday

never mmind now i can explore the lower regions, mmm, there is a mmmetallic echo and i think i ammm very near the hole. o! i ammm afraid.

yes it is sunday pierre will be at church it is not far away. in fact she does not go anywhere she just commmmunes with the big stone at the end of the window sill but you have fat chance of getting her attention when she's doing it.

she worships a stone you are right but it is no ordinary stone, it is a stone made up of stones and all stones are manifest in its aspect at least so says pierre.

as for mme i don't believe in god, i have been around too long, eons and eons both as a living clammmmm and as a fossil, and believe mme, i have seen no sign of anything supernatural in all that timmmme, i wish i had it mmight be useful it mmight save mmme fromm this hole as it seemmms pierre isn't going to do it any timmme soon.

oh guess what ageless. hummboldt's gift turns out to be an idea for a film script, which hummboldt left his good friend charlie in his will. and it isn't any good. can you believe it ageless but the story is not over yet, perhaps.

sorry for laughing at you ageless and see where it has got mme, now mmaybe you are laughing.

tell mmme another story ageless to lift the boredommmm fromm the mmind of your friend

kobo

Lower Things

sorry kobo sorry sorry,,,,,i do want to know about humboldt's gift i do,,,,,,,,what is it?? do you know yet,,,,,i am anxious,,,,,you said humboldt has died? ,,,,perhaps it will be a book of poems,,,,or cash in an envelope,,,,

forgive me,,, pierre is not my beloved it is you kobo,,,,,clikclik,,,

you say she is religious,,,,hmmm,,,how fascinating,,,,sorry kobo,,,i mean how,,,, not exactly fascinating but nevertheless,,,,,,,

is her god a stone god????,,,,,,,,,,,does she worship a STONE?,,,,you can't tell me a stone would have the intelligence to worship a LOBSTER!

i myself am not religious kobo,,,,,,but i like to think about these lower things,,,, do you??? i can't believe god is a giant lobster in the deepest ocean with a long beard and all that sort of thing can you???? ,,,,,waiting for us mortal lobsters to die so we can join him there,,,,,why did he bother to make us ageless then???,,,,,that's what i'd like to know,,,,,but i do believe in some sort of Creative Universal Lobsterian Force,,,,,,,,

whether it loves us,,,that's another thing of course,,,,,

you didn't know i had a deep side did you kobo???? well now you do,,,,i hope you will still like me kobo,,,,,perhaps you will like me more,,,,,

dear kobo, i hope you will tell me soon what humboldt's gift is,,,,,,and more about pierre,,,,,,,no sorry,,,,,never mind,,

your devoted friend,,,,,,

ageless

Jealous of a Stone

jealous ageless! why should I be jealous although i do think you are trying to mmake mme jealous why should i a fossilised clammm be jealous of a stone???

her namme is pierre if you want to know. PIERRE!!!

i know what you are thinking ageless that's a boy's nammme ha! it is a stone's nammme. if you are so good at french you mmust know that.

she is quite religious, mmy sister pierre. you mmust be careful what you say to her don't mmention god it sets her off, not that you are going to commmunicate with her are you???

if you want to ask her anything ask mmme and i will tell her what you asked, it's better.

i amm very madd with you agelesss very mmmad indeed, and if you think about it you'll know why.

i'mmm reading hummmboldt's gift. do you seemmm to care? no.

and you would like it ageless but it is a puzzle to mmme. i amm up to page two hundred and thirty seven ageless, and i still don't know what hummmboldt's gift is. but i suspect i amm about to learn.

perhaps it is a necklace wrapped in red paper, yes i liked your story, but i don't think so.

hummboldt was a crazy poet he has died early on in the story. his friend has just received a letter from his wife kathleen. if it does not reveal the gift of hummboldt i will be temmpted to cheat and read ahead it is driving mmme insane not really.

i may as well tell you pierre did like your story.

you do not deserve to even know that agelesss. you are supposed to be MMMMMY FRIEND as i ammm yours

your spurned beloved kobo

The Necklace

haha french now kobo,,, you think it might be french,,,,,,?? i never heard of a tomato speaking french,,,,,besides the g in manger is a soft g ,,,that would not have sounded much like mango,,,

why don't you ask your sister what they say,,,, she has big ears,,,,,,,

your sister is she,,,her beauty spot,,,is she ,,,, is she pretty?? don't be jealous i'm just clikclik asking,,,,

i have a story for you kobo i was at the beach on tuesday it was windy,,,,oh ! windy,, the waves were tumbling in,,,,,,,there were two people standing in the surf ,,,,,they were wide people with wide pink backs,,,,,,only wide people could stand up in it without falling over,,,,,

i crawled up jetty road where all the humans were eating to get out of the wind,,,,,,,,,,,i watched the people eating under umbrellas,,,,,, eating caesar salads and baguettes,,,they had little bits of lettuce poking from the corners of their mouths,,,they stuck their paper napkins in between the table slats to stop them blowing away,,,,,,

it was an old woman's birthday she had a present wrapped up in red paper,,,,,, when she opened it it was a necklace,,,,,a long one,,,,,,,,,, it would go around her neck three times if she put it on,,,, she stared and stared,,,,as if she didn't know what it was,,,,,,her friends stared too and pointed,,,,,,,, oh,,,it's a necklace,,,,

do you like it kobo???

will your sister like it???

what is her name????

please hurry up and tell your good friend,,,,,,,,,,,

ageless

Pulitzer Prize

really ageless?? mmango is the tammmmil word for mmango?

ageless, mmango is the ENGLISH word for mmango! the tammil word is maangai. you don't know tammil.

the old tommatoes are gone, and there are new ones. they all say mmango. i tried to converse with them. i said, mmango? they replied, mmango. i think i amm getting somewhere...it is something to do with eating, as in mmanger which is french.

i did like your story ageless, oh how i liked it. i immagined mmyself floating on an inflatable havaiana in the water a pink one with flowers like the girl had, floating that is my dreamm, being a stone you see i could not float unaided.

have you any mmore of these lovely seaside stories?

i have finished stephen fry i finished him this mmorning and gave himm to mmy sister. yes i have a sister it is not immpossible. did you think it was?

mmy sister lives beside mmme on the window sill she is not really mmy sister she is a stone, a real one. she has been here nearly as long as mme but not as long.

she is the same pale colour as mme she has black stone ears offset eyes and a beauty spot she looks like a crosseyed mmouse or from certain angles a frog. how do i know? i know because we are bosommm friends and she has told mme what she looks like.

she wants to read the stephen fry. now i can get on with reading hummboldt's gift. it is ammerican, do you think you would like it ageless? it won the pulitzer prize.