Early morning. Last day of climbing. The weather forecast is: rain and storms, heavy in parts.
Sweezus is giving Team Condor a pep talk:
Sweezus: Now, I reckon....
Gaius: We should try and maintain our positions.
Sweezus: Yeah. And take rain jackets.
Arthur: I haven't got one.
Sweezus: Take mine.
Pablo: That is good for him. But I do not have one.
Gaius: Take mine, Pablo.
Sweezus: Then you won't have one.
Gaius: Where's Terence this morning?
Sweezus: Still on the bus tour.
Gaius: Where were they going?
Sweezus: Dunno. Belle knows. Anyway, guys, good luck and remember, Froomey is injured.
......
At Team Sky:
Froomey: Ow Ow.
Thomas: Stop whinging.
Kyryienka: Yeah. We'll look after you.
Landa: It's the virtual last day.
Froome: I KNOW that!
Stannard: Relax. Deeeeeep breathing!
Froomey (taking a deep breath): Let's DO THIS!
Team Sky: Okay!
......
At Team Philosophe:
Vello: I'm not looking forward to the weather.
David: Neither am I.
Marx: Come on boys. The only antidote to mental suffering is physical pain.
David: Who says we're mentally suffering?
Marx: I do.
David: If we are, it's your fault.
Belle: All ready for today?
Vello: Yes, dear. Have you provided some extra nice snacks?
Belle: Not yet. I've been talking to Terence's parrot. She saw him on the bus yesterday.
Marx: Whatever possessed you to put him on a bus tour?
Belle: It's the Buffon tour. I thought he'd like it.
Vello: Ha ha.The Buffon tour!
Marx: What is this Buffon tour which is so funny?
Belle: Every year the tour organisers gather up all the clowns who've been injured by riders and give them a tour. It's by way of a thank you.
Marx: Good lord. What for?
Vello: Keeping quiet.
David: Very sensible, if you ask me. And how was Terence enjoying it?
Belle: In his element. Sitting on a clown's knee. Holding court probably.
Vello: Hmm. You're very trusting of clowns.
Belle: But papa. They're all injured. Now I'm off to the shops. See you at the first feed station!
David: Get something hot!
.......
The race.
There are four cols to get up. De Ghent crests the col des Aravis first.
Secondly he sprints to first place on the col de la Colombière.
Thirdly he is first over the col de Ramaz.
But he will not be King of the Mountain. The maths is already decided.
On the last col, the Joux-Plane, it is now between Nibali, Pantano, and Izigirre.
Izigirre rides way from Nibali and Pantano on the downhill, to win the stage for Spain, the tenth nation to win a stage this year.
As to the rest:
Team Condor maintains its position, somewhere in the middle.
Gaius gets wet.
Arthur is caught by Pablo on his smart phone eating a sausage.
Pablo composes a sausage poem, called Swallow Me Fast And Keep Going.
Team Philosphe also maintains its position, somewhere near the back.
Marx has annoyed his team mates with an inappropriate Marxist aphorism.
Capital is dead labour.
As if this will help them win the Tour!
Team Sky nurses Froomey to victory.
This is how it works though.
There is much to be said for dead labour.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment