Plan For Remaining Alive Under Water

The plane has landed in Bucharest.

Proust, Gaius and Arthur take a bus to the Old Town.

I prefer the Old Town in any city, says Proust.

Provided there is an Old Town, says Gaius.

Of course there is, says Proust. We are going to it.

I mean, says Gaius, that not every city has one.

That goes without saying, says Proust.

Bored with the level of conversation, Arthur gazes out of the window.

He wonders if Proust had meant him to obtain three sets of breathing apparatus, or if he was joking.

After all, Proust had trained as a clown.

As the city lights flash past the window, Arthur imagines the imminent future:

He spends the night in the Old Town. He meets lots of cool people. Next morning he catches a train to a poisonous cave. If breathing apparatus is needed, he will obtain it at that point. Someone's bound to have left some equipment lying about.....

Arthur has already forgotten the reason he is here in the first place.

But he is about to be reminded.

His phone rings. It's Sweezus.

Hey, how's it going? asks Sweezus.

Good, says Arthur. We're in Bucharest, the Old Town.

What's Proust like? asks Sweezus. Are you taking notes?

Course I am, says Arthur, (who has not taken any). He's just said he prefers the Old Town in any city.

Awesome, says Sweezus. Have you written that down?

I don't need to, says Arthur. I've just told you. Why don't you write it down directly.

I just have, says Sweezus, but it's still better if........crackle....

Arthur has run out of battery.

The bus stops in the Old Town.

The Old Town is buzzing with bars, nightclubs, cafés. Electronic dance music pumps through the walls in sync with the heartbeats of students and expats.

See you in the morning, says Arthur.

Wait! says Proust. We need to make an arrangement to meet somewhere. Let's meet at the Van Gogh Café at nine...... no ten...... no make that eleven in the morning. I like to sleep in.

Eleven! says Gaius.

Proust ignores the implied criticism of his sleeping habits. He wonders whether he should remind Arthur of his task in regard to obtaining three sets of breathing apparatus but by the time he has got to the end of his wondering, Arthur has gone.

Which is a pity, because he had come to the following conclusion: He probably should have.

Let's find a backpackers' hostel, says Gaius. I could do with an early night.

First, a restaurant, says Proust. La Mama is said to be good.

Proust and Gaius are soon in La Mama eating delicious ciorba de burta (tripe soup), followed by tigaie picanta (hot pan).

Arthur is in a night club, meeting cool people. The cool people tell Arthur he should have been in Bucharest last night, when Iron Maiden was playing at the Constitution Piata.

Too bad.

The cool people buy Arthur a drink, and take him to another night club where Spitalul de Urgenta is playing Romanian music and hard edged rock.

The band sings Long Live The Beer. And another song which mentions green leaves and a tulip.

Good times.

Yes, his battery is flat. Yes, he has not written written any notes on Proust. No, he has no plan for remaining alive under water.....

But what does it matter. He closes his eyes and falls sleep on a stranger.