Edging Towards Koalas

 It's raining hard on the ocean.

The surf is freaking mental, with thundering waves.

Sweezus has lost Arthur, who has been washed off his surfboard.

Arthur has lost Sweezus, who has been washed off his surfboard as well.

The crashing surf and the treacherous currents drag them sideways.

They are rudely sucked under.

Woah!  Woosh! Hoo!

Arthur washes up on the Town Beach, next to his surfboard.

His knees are bleeding.

He looks about for his bro.

Here he is, also bleeding.

That was awesome, says Sweezus. Are we done for the day?

Done, says Arthur. 

One last look at the fantastic surf, in which now there is no one. 

Lucky those sharks went to Mexico, says Sweezus, swiping blood off.

They head for the camper.

......

Ten minutes later they pull up at the Billabong Zoo.

Terence should be waiting inside the gate, says Arthur.

Bet he won't be, says Sweezus. Let's go in and find him.

Okay, says Arthur. Let me do the talking.

Hi, says the zoo attendant, forget something?

Wrong location, says Arthur. Come to pick up the statue.

Pity, says the attendant. where's it going?

Grafton, says Arthur. 

Pissing down there too, says the attendant. You guys know you're bleeding?

Yeah, we know, says Sweezus. Rain'll be good for it.

I don't think so, says the assistant. Head to the koala hospital in the centre, they'll fix you.

Thanks, says Sweezus.

They enter the zoo.

That was easy, says Sweezus. Where d'you reckon Terence is?

He may be edging towards us, says Arthur.

How come? asks Sweezus.

Like a statue, says Arthur. 

Statues don't edge towards anything, says Sweezus.

Next best thing to not moving, says Arthur.

They stand in the pouring rain looking in different directions.

No one is edging towards them.

Know what? We may as well head for the koala hospital, says Sweezus. Get fixed up. They might've seen Terence.

True. Edging towards them.

Number Of Possible Pops

This is dreary, says Roo-kai.

It's still raining. There are not many visitors today at the Billabong Zoo.

Come ON! says Terence.

Where to? asks Roo-kai.

The black handed spider monkey, says Terence. 

Why particularly? asks Roo-kai.

To give it a present, says Terence.

That won't be allowed, says Roo-kai.

I can show it the present, says Terence.

Okay, says Roo-kai. Where is it?

Here, says Terence, taking the square of bubble wrap out of his shorts pocket.

Terrible present, says Roo-kai. What did you think the monkey would do?

Pops, says Terence.

They walk past a cheetah.

And a red panda.

They might like it, says Roo-kai.

They might eat it, says Terence.

So might the monkey, says Roo-kai.

Monkeys like to play, says Terence.

At last they arrive at a cage containing a black handed spider monkey.

It has black hands. That's how you tell.

Hello, says Terence. Do you only talk monkey?

Si, says the monkey. Only monkey.

It won't understand me, says Terence.

Plooey, says the monkey.

That might be French, says Roo-kai.

For what? asks Terence.

Raining, says Roo-kai. Raining, monkey?

Si, plooey, says the monkey. 

Unprecedented, says Roo-kai. Can you believe it?

Si, says the monkey. Climate chango.

Multo chango, says Roo-kai. 

How come you speak monkey? asks Terence.

It's intuitive, says Roo-kai. 

Ask him if he wants to watch me pop this, says Terence.

This may seem like a foolish question... begins Roo-kai.

Not-no, says the monkey. I always like to see people pop bubble wrap. I can't do it.

Why not? asks Roo-kai.

Vestigial thumb, says the black handed spider monkey. But I do have strong hook-like fingers.

He holds them up, so that Roo-kai and Terence can see his vestigial thumb.

It would be very hard to pop bubble wrap with it.

Watch me, says Terence. 

Pop pop pop.

Ha ha, laughs the monkey. Have you ever thought of sitting on it?

I sat on it in the camper, says Terence.

I'm surprised you have any pops left, says the monkey.

This is the first time Terence has realised that the number of pops has a limit.

Dark Crushing Waves

Port Macquarie.

It's still raining.

Sweezus pulls up outside the Billabong Zoo.

Doesn't look very busy, says Arthur.

Yeah, it doesn't, says Sweezus. 

Are you coming in with me? asks Terence.

Suppose so, says Sweezus. They won't let a kid in on his own.

Even with a parrot, says Terence.

Especially with a parrot, says Sweezus. We'll take you in, and leave you there for a couple of hours. How'd that be?

Good, says Terence. 

Only one of us has to go in with him, says Arthur. 

Okay, says Sweezus. You take him in. I'll stay here and check out the surf report.

Arthur gets out with Terence. They go to the entrance.

Have you got a voucher? asks the attendant.

No, says Arthur. I'm here to deliver a statue.

O wow! says the attendant. So cute. It looks real!

I am real, says Terence.

Now here's a dilemma, if the statue is real.

But what the hell. It's raining buckets. Go through.

Arthur picks up the statue and carries him into the Billabong Zoo.

That was EMBARRASSING! says Terence.

You'll get over it, says Arthur.

I am over it, says Terence. Where's the black handed spider monkey?

Roo-kai'll help you find it, saysd Arthur.

But he's not here, says Terence.

Yes I am, says Roo-kai, landing beside him. 

Great, says Arthur. We'll be back in a couple of hours. Come to the entrance.

How can I, if I'm a statue? asks Terence.

Gradually, says Arthur. Give yourself plenty of time.

He heads back to the entrance.

Delivered the statue already? asks the attendant. Where are they putting it?

Near the spider monkey, says Arthur.

Sweezus is sitting in the camper, looking pensive.

What? asks Arthur.

Surf conditions are hazardous, says Sweezus,

Great! says Arthur.

I feel bad about leaving Terence, says Sweezus.

He's fine, says Arthur. They think he's a statue. And he's with Roo-kai.

A statue? says Sweezus. Wonder why? Okay, let's head down to Town Beach and check it out. 

They drive down to Town Beach, where conditions do look quite hazardous.

Only a few crazy surfers are out there, heads, arms or legs intermittently visible, among dark crushing waves.

To Keep My Head Dry

Sweezus is driving the camper.

He turns on the wipers. Freakin' rain.

Where's my parrot? asks Terence.

Probably flying overhead, says Sweezus. Or sitting in a tree keeping dry.

Arthur looks out of the window.

I see him, says Arthur. 

Stop! says Terence. Let him in!

Sweezus stops. Arthur opens his window. 

Roo-kai swoops in.

Merde! says Arthur. 

I was waiting for the chance, says Roo-kai. 

You're dripping wet, says Arthur. Get in the back with Terence.

Yes, says Terence. You can sit next to me.

He moves his square of bubble wrap so Roo-kai can sit on it.

Pop pop pop.

What was that? asks Roo-kai.

Your bottom, says Terence.

Roo-kai looks down. Very funny.

Where are we going? asks Roo-kai.

Port Macquarie, says Sweezus.

Where are the frogs? asks Roo-kai.

With Gaius and Ludwig, says Arthur. They're pushing through to Grafton.

To go night hunting, says Terence. It's not fair.

It's all good, says Sweezus. Terence can't go night hunting. But now you're here, you can entertain him while Arthur and I get in a few hours of surfing.

In this rain? asks Roo-kai.

Sure, says Sweezus. Rain never hurt anyone.

If you say so, says Roo-kai.

What will we do? asks Terence.

Up to you, says Sweezus. 

Arthur looks up things for kids to do in Port Macquarie, on his phone.

Billabong Zoo, says Arthur. A major breeding centre for koalas.

Yuck, says Terence. 

They also have a lion and a cheetah, says Arthur. And a hairy-nosed wombat and a black-handed spider monkey. 

Can I take my bubble wrap? asks Terence.

What for? asks Sweezus.

But Terence knows Sweezus won't think handing bubble wrap to a black-handed spider monkey and watching him pop it will be all that funny.

To keep my head dry, says Terence.

Hunting At Night

Has everyone finished eating? asks Gaius. 

No, says Terence, from under the table.

Apart from you, says Gaius.

Us, says the frogs.

We must stop somewhere so the frogs can go hunting, says Gaius.

I'll go hunting with them, says Terence.

We hunt mainly at night, says Quiet-Tartus.

Yay! says Terence.

You're not hunting at night, little buddy, says Sweezus.

You could come too, says Terence.

We don't need heavy-footed companions, says Shorty-Tartus.

End of story, says Sweezus. Let's go.

They all leave the café, and head for the vehicles.

It's raining.

Who's coming with me in the Mazda? asks Wittgenstein.

I will, says Gaius. Has it dried out inside?

Let us hope so, says Wittgenstein. Perhaps we should find ourselves two plastic bags to sit on.

There might be some in the camper, says Gaius.

Midge doesn't use plastic, says Sweezus. 

Not even to sit on? says Wittgenstein.

I'll find you something to sit on, says Arthur.

He has noticed a post office.

He goes in and comes out with a roll of bubble wrap.

Excellent! says Gaius. Ever reliable.

Sweezus finds a pair of scissors, in a drawer in the camper.

He cuts two car-seat sized squares.

Can I have one? asks Terence?

All right, says Sweezus, cutting him a small one.

Terence sits down on it.

Pop pop pop.

What's our route? asks Sweezus. Back to Taree, then north on the Pacific Highway to the Gold Coast? 

Yes, says Gaius. But it's a five hour drive, maybe longer, in this rain.

No worries, says Sweezus. We'll stop in Port Macquarie. That's only an hour away.

Good plan, says Gaius. We can work out what to do from there.

Will it be night time? asks Terence.

No, says Sweezus. That why we're stopping. Good surf.

Hmm, says Gaius. I wasn't planning a long stop.

Okay, says Sweezus. New plan. We stop in Port Macquarie. You and Ludwig take the frogs, and drive on to Grafton. That's three and a half hours away. It'll be dark and the frogs can go hunting. We'll catch up with you there.

Gaius is impatient to leave, and as plans go, this sounds like a good one.

The frogs think so too. 

Less Fun In The Bucket

 They leave the museum.

Terence carries the frogs in their corn chip packet.

When can we get out? asks Quiet-Tartus.

Now, says Terence. He opens the packet.

The two frogs jump out.

Where are we going?

A café, says Gaius. But which one? I'll call Arthur.

He calls Arthur.

Where are you? asks Arthur.

Where are you? asks Gaius.

Bent On Food, says Arthur. Isabella Street.

It's not far away.

Soon the party is reunited.

Arthur and Sweezus are just finishing their Pork Belly Tacos.

I think I'll have a salad, says Gaius. Pear and Haloumi with Bacon and Walnuts sounds nice.

I'll have the banana bread, says Wittgenstein. 

He goes to the counter to order.

Any news? asks Gaius.

Yeah, says Sweezus. Pacific Highway's re-opened.

Excellent, says Gaius. We'll set off as soon as we've eaten.

Did you get that frog photo printed? asks Sweezus.

I did, says Gaius. Thanks to Stanley. And Terence managed to do a good deed.

No way! says Sweezus. What was it?

There were these birds' eggs , says Terence. And I took them to meet their grandpa. And they're allowed to stay there.

I don't get it, says Sweezus. 

Terence has truncated the story, says Gaius. Suffice to say, the eggs' mother was also involved.

Awesome, says Sweezus, losing interest. Anyone want a coffee?

I'll get them, says Arthur.

Wittgenstein returns with banana bread, strawberry and pear compote, and house yogurt.

Your salad is coming, says Wittgenstein.

Thank you, says Gaius. 

Terence is bored. No one has even got him a red drink.

He looks for the frogs.

They are bored also, under the table.

It was fun in the museum, says Quiet-Tartus. Remember when we hid in the bushranger's bucket?

He probably had to wee and poo in that bucket, says Terence.

How would you know? asks Shorty-Tartus.

But the fun in the bucket has diminished.

We Would Love That

Gaius and Terence arrive with the frogs.

Guess where we found them, says Terence. 

Where? asks Stanley.

In the bushranger's bucket, says Terence.

I trust you left the bucket in situ, says Stanley.

Of course, says Gaius.

Your bird has moved two of the birds' eggs, says Stanley. 

I apologise, says Gaius. I trust they're undamaged. 

They are in good condition, says Stanley. No harm done. 

And in fact, says Wittgenstein, Stanley is now thinking of rearranging his collection.

In the modern way of museum curation, says Stanley. 

Meaningful juxtapositions? says Gaius.

Yes, says Stanley. These birds' eggs, for example, might be placed near the thunder egg, and the stuffed magpie.

We would love that, say the eggs, who are listening.

We'll leave that to you, says Gaius. We must be off now. Our young colleagues have already left to look for a café.

Bent On Food is a good one, says Stanley. Well, good bye then. But where is your bird?

He will find us, says Gaius. By the way, must the frogs leave the museum in their packet?

Please, says Stanley. If people see frogs hopping out of the museum, unrestricted, they will all want the same privilege.

To bring frogs in? says Gaius.

And out, says Stanley. 

Stanley goes back to the office, to work on his curation.

Roo-kai is there, replacing the key.

Thank you, says Stanley. I understand you took the key for the best of reasons.

I am ashamed, says Roo-kai. It was not the best of reasons.

To reunite a family, says Stanley. I call that a good reason.

It was really so that Terence could remain with the birds' eggs as Gaius had instructed, says Roo-kai.

Your idea or his? asks Stanley.

Let's say, some things just happen, says Roo-kai.

If One Or Two Hats

 You may not believe it, says Wittgenstein.

Try me, says Stanley.

It was the parrot, says Wittgenstein. The parrot took the key from your office, opened the glass case, stuffed a folded cloth in the gap to prop the lid open, and lifted the eggs out.

On his own? says Stanley. No, I don't believe it. What was his reason?

If you don't believe it, you don't need a reason, says Wittgenstein.

I'm willing to listen, says Stanley. 

To restore the eggs to their family, says Wittgenstein. Or at least, enable a visit.

That would be more convincing if the eggs had been left near the stuffed magpie in the framed diorama, says Stanley.

It would, says Wittgenstein. But who's to say that they haven't already been there?

Us, says the eggs.

Did you hear something? asks Stanley.

The eggs saying US, says Wittgenstein. And we know what that means.

Unless they're lying, says Stanley.

Give me one good reason why the eggs would be lying, says Wittgenstein.

They want to see the stuffed magpie, says Stanley. And they think they have a better chance if we believe they haven't seen her already.

It is clear the Stanley knows something about egg psychology.

Can we see her? asks the eggs. Then we'll happily return to Frederick Murray's collection.

I don't see why not, says Stanley.

He picks up the eggs and takes them to look at their mother.

Wittgenstein follows.

Stanley holds the eggs up, one in each hand.

We saw grandpa, say the eggs, to their mother.

Mother magpie says nothing, being stuffed.

He was going to give us a hat, say the eggs. He still might.

Mother magpie wonders if one hat or two hats were promised.

Who was their grandpa? wonders Stanley.

That thunder egg they were placed on top of, says Wittgenstein. I bet that was their grandpa.

Fascinating, says Stanley. Perhaps it's time to rejig the collections.

Two And Two Together

Gaius and Terence are looking for the Justice Law and Order exhibition.

This looks like it.

They enter.

Wittgenstein is in there already.

Ludwig! says Gaius. I assume you've had your fill of the Vampire jet engine?

Yes, says Ludwig. We all have. Sweezus and Arthur have gone to look for a café.

Have you seen Terence's frogs? asks Gaius. They were coming here.

They hopped in and hopped out again, says Wittgenstein. 

Short attention spans, says Gaius. 

Guess what? says Terence.

What? asks Wittgenstein.

We took the birds' eggs to see their family, says Terence. 

TOOK them? says Wittgenstein.

So it would seem, says Gaius. They were already out of the glass case when I got there.

How did they get out? asks Wittgenstein. 

Roo-kai went into the office and borrowed a key, says Terence. 

I did not know that, says Gaius.

A crime has been committed, says Wittgenstein. At least we are in the right room.

Indeed, says Gaius. So this is the small timber lock-up where they imprisoned Jimmy Governor.

Is that his bed? asks Terence.

Yes, says Gaius. Or a facsimile.

And is that his bucket? asks Terence?

I suppose so, says Gaius. And look. Handcuffs, leg irons and a man trap.

Lucky Roo-kai isn't here, says Terence.

Where is he? asks Gaius. We must be going.

I'll look for him, says Wittgenstein. You look for the frog gang.

They split up to do this.

Wittgenstein enters the room with the framed diorama of birds and mammals.

No Roo-kai.

He enters the room with the thunder egg, and other crystalline structures.

Two eggs are sitting on the cabinet.

No Roo-kai.

He enters the room with the glass case propped open with a folded antimacassar.

He looks into the glass case.

There are two empty spots, labelled 'magpie eggs'.

He puts two and two together.

He returns to the thunder egg cabinet.

Stanley is there, looking puzzled.

I believe I can explain this, says Wittgenstein.

Then please do, says Stanley.

He Who Knows Everything

 The thunder egg does have a face. Two black rimmed eyes and a mouth that is laughing.

Also, white hair and a beard, which is what makes it a grandpa.

The eggs remain sceptical however.

Wouldn't our grandpa be a magpie?

No, says Terence. An egg would be your grandpa.

How do you know? ask the eggs.

He doesn't, says Gaius. An egg could well be considered your grandpa, but it would have to be the egg of a magpie.

My grandpa isn't, says Terence.

You don't have a grandpa, says Gaius.

I do. Grandpa Marx, says Terence. He knows everything.

I doubt it, says Gaius.

YOU don't know everything, says Terence.

Tell us about your grandpa, say the eggs.

He bought me a hat, says Terence.

Where is it? ask the eggs.

They would like to see it.

One of them looks sideways at the thunder egg.

Maybe it's listening.

I lost it, says Terence.

The frogs have tired of this talk about grandpas. Frogs don't have them. 

They are about to hop away.

Stop! says Gaius. Where are you going?

To see the Justice, Law and Order exhibition, says Shorty-Tartus. There's a small timber lockup that once held a bushranger.

Let's go! says Terence.

Can we stay here? ask the eggs.

Not really, says Gaius. How would that look?

You can come back this way and get us, say the eggs. We want to spend time with our grandpa.

I suppose there's no harm in it, says Gaius. All right, I'll leave you on top of the cabinet.

He places the eggs on the top of the cabinet, directly over their grandpa.

Grandpa thunder egg does not change his expression.

He does not need to.

The smile on his face is the smile of someone who might buy you a hat.

And then lecture you on the means of production.

All We Need

Are we looking for frogs or having a tour of the museum? ask the eggs.

Both, says Gaius. Keep your eyes peeled.

The eggs like that expression.

Gaius passes the fossilised bone of a diprotodon optatum. And a whale's lower jawbone.

These will not interest the eggs.

Nor do they interest Terence.

Aha! But these will! 

Look here, Terence, says Gaius. And you eggs look, too.

Yuck, says Terence. What are they?

Bezoars, says Gaius. Otherwise known as hairballs. These were found in the stomachs of cows.

Gross, say the eggs. Let's keep going.

No, wait, says Terence. Do cows eat hair?

Not normally, says Gaius. A bezoar can be made up of any partly digested material.

Have I got one? asks Terence.

You only drink red drinks, says Gaius. I hardly think so.

I ate that apple once, says Terence.

But it all came out, says Gaius.

What about the eggs? asks Terence. 

What about us? ask the eggs. We never eat anything. We're empty.

How do you know? asks Terence.

Of course they're empty, says Gaius. Come here. Take a look in this hole.

He shows Terence a tiny hole in one of the eggs where the contents were long ago sucked out by Frederick Murray.

Unless he got someone else to do it.

Can you see a hairball? asks the egg anxiously.

YES! says Terence.

The egg trembles. How disgusting.

So does the other one. 

Ha ha! says Terence. Only joking.

Can we go and look for the frogs now? ask the eggs. We hate this museum.

I'm sorry to hear that, says Gaius. I shouldn't have stopped at the hairballs. You might enjoy this though. It's Dr Iain Sutherland's rock and mineral collection.

He enters the room. As luck would have it the frogs are there, perusing the collection.

Hey! says Terence. What are you looking at?

A thunder egg, says Quiet-Tartus. 

It's got a face, says Shorty-Tartus.

Maybe it's the eggs' grandpa, says Terence

That's all we need, thinks Gaius. 

Allow Us Our Illusions

 Okay, says Terence. Let's find the frogs.

We want to spend more time with our mother, say the eggs.

You have to be where I am, says Terence. Or I'll get into trouble from Gaius.

You will anyway, says Roo-kai.

Not if I stay with the eggs, says Terence.

Okay, say the eggs. Goodbye mother.

She's not your mother, says Terence. 

Allow us our illusions, say the eggs.

Gaius comes up behind them with the newly printed photo.

I thought I told you to stay with the birds' eggs, says Gaius. And what did I find? The glass case propped open with a folded antimacassar, two eggs missing and no sign of you or Roo-Kai.

I HAVE stayed with the birds' eggs, says Terence. See?

You must have known what I meant, says Gaius. We'll return the eggs before Stanley discovers they're missing. 

They want to see the rest of the museum, says Terence. This is their chance.

Just a quick tour then, says Gaius. Give them to me. I fear you will break them.

Yay! says Terence. 

The eggs say nothing.

Gaius takes the eggs and gives Terence the photo.

Good photo! says Terence. The frogs will like it.

Where are they? asks Gaius.

They were coming here to see the stuffed golden brush-tailed possum, says Roo-kai. But they've gone.

Dear me, says Gaius. They could be anywhere.

Ask our mother, say the eggs. She was watching.

Mother? says Gaius. Do you mean her?

He indicates the stuffed magpie.

Yes, say the eggs. We are magpie eggs and she is our mother.

They think, says Terence.

Gaius looks at the mother magpie. She looks down at the stuffed golden brush-tailed possum.

See that? say the eggs. Mother says the possum can tell us.

Wishful thinking, says Gaius.

Its tail might be telling us, says Terence. 

As in pointing in the right direction? says Gaius.

Yes, says Terence. You're smart.

There re two ways out of this room, says Gaius, and the tail points to that one. We shall take it on trust.

They exit the room.

Mother magpie continues to look at the possum.

I'm A Bird Myself

The magpie gazes out through glass eyes.

The eggs in Terence's hands gaze inwards.

A poignant moment.

That could be our mother, say the eggs.

How come you always say the same thing? asks Terence.

Because we are eggs, say the eggs.

An insensitive and irrelevant question, says Roo-kai. The eggs may just have come face to face with their stuffed mother.

Woo, says Terence. That would be creepy

At least YOU are sympathetic, say the eggs to Roo-kai.

Thanks, says Roo-kai. I'm a bird myself, that's why I'm sympathetic.

Hang on, says Terence. These eggs are empty.

How do you know? asks Roo-kai.

Didn't you feel them when you picked them up? asks Terence.

Come to think of it, yes, says Roo-kai. They were light as two feathers.

So that magpie isn't their mother, says Terence.

Hey, stop right there, say the eggs. We don't follow.

She may be the mother of your former contents, says Roo-kai. 

Are we in trouble? ask the eggs.

Of course not, says Roo-kai. You have done nothing wrong. And she may be your owner.

The magpie gazes dolefully down at the eggs. Is she the owner?

And therefore, the mother of their missing contents?

The eggs look at one another. Is this what it means to be sollers?

What's up? asks Roo-kai.

What is the meaning of sollers? ask the eggs.

Shoes, says Terence.

No! says Roo-kai. Not shoes. I think you have mispronounced the word solace, although only slightly.

So what is it? ask the eggs.

I was thinking earlier, says Roo-kai, that life goes on in spite of everything, Which gave me comfort, or solace.

So it MIGHT be shoes, says Terence.

Life goes on? ask the eggs. Our mother is stuffed and we're empty. How does that work?

They would see it like that.

Roo-kai tries to think of a comforting answer,

Escape And Goggle

Roo-kai has returned with the key, which he found on a hook in the office.

Open it! says Terence.

You'll have to do it, says Roo-kai. I have my limits.

Terence pokes the key into the keyhole. 

Click. 

Now it should be possible to open the glass case containing the birds' eggs.

But Terence can only lift the lid up so far.

Get something to jam it open! says Terence.

Roo-kai looks about for something to jam it open.

There is nothing in this room. He flies out to the next room which contains old fashioned domestic furniture, jars, pots, lace doilies, a coal scuttle, fire dog and bellows.

He comes back with an antimacassar.

Terence lets down the lid of the glass case with a bang.

What's that? asks Terence.

No idea, says Roo-kai. But if you fold it and jam it under the lid it should hold the lid open enough for a conversation.

Terence folds and refolds the antimacassar.

The two of them succeed in jamming it under the lid.

Hello, you eggs! says Terence. 

Hurrrr, say the eggs.

What's the matter? asks Terence.

We're not used to breathing, say the eggs.

What kind of eggs are you? asks Roo-kai.

Magpie eggs, say the eggs.

It seems they have quickly got used to breathing.

Want to come with us to look at a stuffed possum? asks Terence.

Anything for a change of scenery, say the eggs.

Roo-kai pokes his beak in, stabs an egg, lifts it, and eases it into the cement hands of Terence.

Then the other one.

Yay! says Terence. Let's go.

It's not far to the framed diorama of birds and mammals, made by William Garlick, a self taught naturalist and taxidermist, around 1889.

Look, a stuffed possum! says Terence.

But the eggs are goggling, as only eggs can, at the spectacle of a stuffed magpie.

Finding The Sollers

Why did you choose birds' eggs? asks Terence.

I don't know, why did we? asks Shorty-Tartus.

Had to choose something, says Quiet-Tartus. Now we've seen them. Let's go.

Gaius said Terence has to stay near the birds' eggs, says Roo-kai.

Okay, we'll go, says Quiet-Tartus.

Where will you go? asks Terence.

To see the stuffed possum, says Quiet-Tartus.

That's not fair, says Terence.

Being stuffed is never fair, says Quiet-Tartus.

Ha ha! laughs Shorty-Tartus. 

The frogs hop away in search of the stuffed possum.

I'll stay with you, says Roo-kai. I find solace in these birds' egg arrangements.

The birds' eggs are straining to hear what Roo-kai is saying.

Those eggs are moving! says Terence.

Are you sure? asks Roo-kai. Why yes, those two are vibrating.

Maybe they want to talk to us, says Terence.

Or hear what we're saying, says Roo-kai.

I bet they can't hear us, says Terence.

He puts his face up to the glass and shouts, ROO-KAI finds SOLLERS!

You  embarrass me, says Roo-kai.

Look! says Terence. There's a keyhole!  Let's find the key!

We can't leave this position, says Roo-kai.

You can, says Terence. I'll stay. You go and find it.

Then what? asks Roo-kai.

Open the case and get the eggs out, says Terence.

Out? says Roo-kai. Originally you thought they wanted a conversation.

Just go! says Terence.

Roo-kai goes. This is something like spying and after all, he is a decorated French spy.

Terence mimes what is going to happen, in front of the glass.

The two closest eggs become excited.

Can we be the sollers? they wonder.

Birds' Eggs, Stuffed Possums

I'll go, says Terence.

He runs back to the log.

Roo-kai is perched on it, next to the packet.

We need that! says Terence. 

What for? asks Roo-kai.

The frogs aren't allowed in the museum, says Terence.

Typical, says Roo-kai. They probably wouldn't let me in either.

Parrots are different, says Terence. Do you want to?

Roo-kai is bored. Yes, he wants to.

They return to the museum entrance, with the corn chip packet.

Sweezus, Arthur and Wittgenstein have already gone in.

Gaius is waiting with the frogs and the museum man, Stanley.

I assume, says Gaius, to Stanley, that the frogs may come in, if they're inside this packet.

Certainly, says Stanley. What are their interests? Natural history? Justice, Law and Order?

What does it matter, if they must remain inside the packet? asks Gaius.

It's just when they're on the way in, says Stanley. After that, I thought they might like to view our collections. We have stones, fossils, birds' eggs, stuffed possums, old furniture and a small timber lockup which once held a famous bushranger.

The birds' eggs, says Quiet-Tartus.

Wonderful, says Gaius. Let us go in. I shall pay for our party, including a small token for the frogs. 

Not necessary, says Stanley. Is that oystercatcher coming? I'm afraid it won't....

He's my parrot, says Terence.

Stanley decides to let this go, in the interests of getting on with things, after the the hold up with the corn chip packet.

Where are the birds' eggs? asks Terence.

Over there in that cabinet, says Stanley. There are 570 of them, collected by Frederick Murray, from 1924 on.

Come on, gang, says Terence.

Will they be all right on their own? asks Stanley. I'd like to get this photograph printed. I have other commitments.

Indeed, says Gaius. Terence, stay near the birds' eggs until I return.

He goes off to the office with Stanley.

Yay! says Terence.

He runs across to the cabinet containing the birds' eggs.

The birds' eggs lie in the cabinet, arranged neatly according to type, size and markings.

Normally they pay no heed to being looked at.

But this is the first time in a long time they have been looked at by frogs.

Not Wide Enough To Stick An Arm In

A man comes out of the museum and walks across to the jet.

How do you like our Vampire jet? asks the man.

It's a classic, says Sweezus. 

Donated by the Manning River branch of the Air Force Association, says the man.

Yeah? says Sweezus, with one eye on the frogs.

They can't get down, says Terence.

Who can't? asks the museum man. I hope none of your party has climbed up there.

Just two frogs, says Gaius. They are harmless.

Do they need a ladder? asks the man from the museum.

Surely not, says Gaius.

He calls up to the frogs who are still on the wing of the Vampire jet, looking down.

Jump! says Gaius. Consider it part of your training!

You train frogs? asks the man from the museum.

They are training themselves, says Gaius.

Yes, says Terence. They want to win competitions

Quiet-Tartus and Shorty-Tartus leap down bravely, and land on the concrete block.

Gaius took a photo! says Terence.

Let's see, says Quiet-Tartus. 

Gaius shows them the photo.

Can we get a print of it? asks Shorty-Tartus.

I have no means to do that, says Gaius.

Come into the museum, says the museum man. I've a printer in the office.

Very kind, says Gaius.

Entry is five dollars per adult and a dollar for the infant, says the museum man. And well worth it.

No doubt, says Gaius.

What's going on? asks Wittgenstein, who has made his decision regarding the car windows.

Open, a few centimetres at the top. Not enough for anyone to stick their arm in and open the door.

We're going to visit the museum, says Gaius. This kind gentleman has given us a discount.

I haven't, says the museum man. Those are our regular prices.

We have a photograph of the frogs performing a stunt on the wing of this Vampire, says Gaius. And we are going into the museum, to make use of the printer in the office, and print out a copy.

I say! says Wittgenstein, looking up. This is a fine old jet. Where did it come from?

He is told. With the additional information that it was donated in 1971, on the occasion of the RAAF's 50th birthday.

What a treasure, says Wittgenstein.

The engine is in the museum, says the museum man.

They all head across to the museum. 

You can't bring the frogs in, says the museum man.

They have their own packet, says Gaius. Where is it?

It is probably back at the log. Someone will have to run back and get it.

Jet Tricks

All right, says Quiet-Tartus. We'll sit on the log for a minute.

I'll take a photo, says Gaius.

Terence cheers up.

Gaius lifts Quiet-Tartus and Shorty-Tartus onto the 400 year old tallow wood log.

He takes out his phone, for a photo.

Smiling, says Terence.

We're not smiling, says Quiet-Tartus.

Snap. The frogs are immortalised, on the log, unsmiling.

Can I see? asks Terence. 

Gaius shows him the picture.

The frogs look around. There's a good view, even though the log is horizontal.

They can see Wittgenstein contemplating his windows.

And Sweezus and Arthur approaching.

Cool jet, says Sweezus. Come and see it.

All right, says Gaius. Are we done here?

Yes, says Terence. Get the frogs off.

Sweezus lifts them both off.

The frogs are only too happy. They are smiling.

I told you they'd like it, says Sweezus. 

We didn't like it, says Quiet-Tartus.

You'll like the jet even better, says Sweezus. 

Can they go in it? asks Terence.

Up to them, says Sweezus. If they want to.

Yay! says Terence. They want to!

He runs ahead to the jet.

It's an old Vampire, mounted on a piece of curved metal, set in a large concrete block.

He would like to get in it himself.

Here come the frogs, carried by Sweezus.

Go for it, says Sweezus, setting them down on the block. 

They climb the curved metal, scramble up the sides of the jet and drop into the cockpit.

Hey! calls Terence. What can you see?

Nothing! shouts Quiet-Tartus. Wait a sec!

Moments later, a frog appears on each wing of the Vampire.

Take a photo! shouts Shorty-Tartus. Wait till we're ready!

They each try to stand on one leg. But being frogs they can't do it.

Shorty-Tartus hops across to the wing Quiet-Tartus is on.

And jumps onto his shoulders.

Now! shouts Shorty-Tartus.

Snap!

Best frog photo ever!

A Crab Song

Gaius has spotted the tallow wood log, and walked over to see it.

Sweezus and Arthur are admiring the Vampire jet, mounted on a cement block opposite the museum.

Wittgenstein is determining exactly how far open he should leave his car windows.

Roo-kai and Terence have returned to the camper to pick up the frogs.

Roo-kai flies in, though an open side window.

The packet of corn chips is rustling.

Is that you, Quiet-Tartus and Shorty-Tartus? asks Roo-kai.

Who wants to know? asks Quiet-Tartus.

Roo-kai, says Roo-kai. Terence asked me to fetch you. 

Where are we going? asks Shorty-Tartus.

To look at a log, says Roo-kai. Terence informs me you love them.

Love logs? asks Quiet-Tartus.

We love TREES, says Shorty Tartus.

A log was once part of a tree, says Roo-kai. This particular log is a long one.

We'll pass, says Quiet-Tartus.

Not an option, says Roo-kai, lifting the corn chip packet with his beak.

He flies out of the window with it.

Looks like we're going, says Shorty-Tartus.

We'll stay in the packet, says Quiet-Tartus. And look at the log through the opening.

Shall we pretend that we love it? asks Shorty-Tartus

Why should we? says Quiet-Tartus. 

Roo-kai drops the packet at Terence's feet.

Good! says Terence. Are they still in it?

Yes, says Roo-kai. But they didn't want to come.

Terence opens the packet and pulls out both frogs.

He runs across to where Gaius is standing, in front of the log.

This log, says Gauius, is over four hundred years old. 

That's old, says Terence. Can the frogs sit on it?

We don't want to sit on it, says Quiet-Tartus.

You do, says Terence.

Why? asks Shorty-Tartus.

Frog, frog, sitting on a log, sings Terence. Now he runs a little way. He's GONE!

There is no such song, says Gaius. If I'm not mistaken, that's a crab song.

Crab, crab, sitting on the sand, sings Shorty-Tartus. That one?

Yes that's the one, says Gaius. Now here comes a little wave. He's GONE.

The frogs look triumphant.

Terence is not happy. His treat for the frogs is in ruins.

The Shape Of The Wet Patch

The Mazda pulls up at Central Park, Wingham.

A minute later, the camper pulls up behind it.

Arthur and Wittgenstein are out of the Mazda, and are airing their damp parts.

Roo-kai has remained in the Mazda.

Sweezus gets out of the camper, followed by Gaius and Terence.

Let's have a look for that log, says Gaius.

Wait! says Terence. The frogs want to see it!

So bring them, says Sweezus.

They're still in the packet, says Terence.

Bring the packet, says Sweezus.

Can you? asks Terence.

Ask your parrot, says Sweezus. 

He heads off with Arthur to look for the Vampire jet first.

Where's my parrot? asks Terence, going across to the Mazda, where Wittgenstein is standing with his head through the window.

In here, says Wittgenstein. He doesn't want to come out.

You've got wet pants, says Terence.

Tell me something I don't know, says Wittgenstein.

You don't know the shape of the wet patch, says Terence.

What shape is it? asks Wittgenstein.

Bum-shape, says Terence.

Wittgenstein straightens at once, bumping his head on the top of the window.

Ha ha! laughs Terence.

He tries to see in through the window.

He is too low, and Roo-kai knows it.

Will Roo-kai helpfully shuffle across to the window?

Yes.

What? asks Roo-kai.

I can't do EVERYTHING! says Terence.

What can't you do now? asks Roo-kai.

Get the frogs out of the camper, says Terence. Sweezus and Arthur have gone to look at a jet.

What jet? asks Roo-kai.

There's a log and a jet in this dumb park, says Terence.

A jet, eh? says Roo-kai. I wonder if it would be of any interest to the French government.

YES! says Terence. And so would the log!

I doubt it, says Roo-kai, squeezing himself through the window.

Come ON! cries Terence. The frogs want to see it. 

Why though? asks Roo-kai.

Frogs love logs, says Terence.

My Dark Thoughts Exactly

It's stopped raining.

Sweezus is driving the camper.

Gaius is beside him. 

Terence is in the back with the corn chip packet containing the frogs.

How are they doing? asks Gaius.

How do I know? asks Terence.

Look in on them, says Gaius.

Terence opens the packet, which has been folded.

Are we there yet? asks Quiet-Tartus.

No, says Terence. Wait. Are we there yet?

No, says Gaius. It's ten minutes to Wingham.

Do we have to go there? asks Quiet-Tartus.

Yes, says Terence. There's a long log to look at.

Too right, says Sweezus. Tell them they'll like it.

You'll like it, says Terence.

And a Vampire jet, says Sweezus. In the same park. 

What's it doing there? asks Gaius.

Donated, says Sweezus.

It's the bats we're afraid of, says Quiet-Tartus.

Yes, says Shorty-Tartus. 

So stay in the packet, says Terence.

He folds it over, and looks out of the window of the camper.

They're catching up! shouts Terence.

The Mazda shoots past the camper.

Wittgenstein is driving. Arthur is beside him. Roo-kai is squeezed into the gap.

The windows are down to help the Mazda dry out while they're driving.

How is your bottom? asks Wittgenstein.

In what sense? asks Arthur.

Sitting on that towel, says Wittgenstein. Mine's wet.

Now that you mention it, says Arthur. Mine's wet too.

All that rain, says Wittgenstein. I wish I'd closed the window.

Look on the bright side, says Roo-kai.

Which is? asks Wittgenstein.

I found shelter, says Roo-kai.

You could have got into the camper, says Wittgenstein.

I needed to be alone, says Roo-kai.

So you sat here, letting the rain in. What were you thinking? asks Wittgenstein.

Dark thoughts, says Roo-kai.

I understand that, says Wittgenstein. I have dark thoughts too.

Me too, says Arthur.

They travel in silence, thinking their dark thoughts together.

Not the best way to deal with dark thoughts.

After five minutes, Roo-kai asks Arthur what his dark thoughts are.

Lately I've been too reliable, says Arthur. 

No kidding? says Roo-kai. Those are my dark thoughts exactly. 

Didn't you let Terence fall out of a tree? asks Wittgenstein.

But I'd volunteered to go and find him, says Arthur. I didn't have to.

Chaos, says Wittgenstein. You sought drama and chaos.

There you go, says Roo-kai. You weren't being reliable. But me, I've done too many messages.

And received little thanks, says Wittgenstein.

No thanks at all, says Roo-kai.

I would have thanked you if you'd come and told me the car window was open, says Wittgenstein.

Sorry, says Roo-kai.

They are almost in Wingham, where the bats come to drink, and the tallow wood log is.

They speed up.

 The smell of damp seats floats behind them.

Where Bats Come

I hear you're working out plans, says Roo-kai.

Yes, says Gaius. When the rain stops, we'll go inland to Wingham.

It's stopping now, says Roo-kai.

I can confirm that, says Wittgenstein. 

Good, says Gaius. We'll go to Wingham, and work out our next move from there.

Wingham, says Arthur. What's at Wingham?

It hardly matters, says Gaius.

May as well look, says Sweezus, getting out his phone.

Bats,  says Sweezus. Which is why it's called Wingham.

Not after Wingham in Kent? asks Wittgenstein.

Maybe, says Sweezus, but the aboriginal word wingan means where bats come to drink.

Ah, says Gaius. One can see how the name arose.

Can one? asks Wittgenstein.

Yes, says Gaius. A British explorer asks a local indigenous fellow what the name of the place is, and the fellow says wingan, and the explorer thinks, understandably, that he has said Wingham, so he names the place Wingham.

Why understandably? asks Wittgenstein,

Being British, says Gaius. He will know Kent.

Has he asked the aboriginal fellow what wingan means? asks Wittgenstein.

He may not have felt the need to, says Gaius. 

Let's say he did and the fellow said it's where bats come to drink, says Wittgenstein.

Then the explorer would have been pleased with his naming, says Gaius.

Assuming he'd noticed the bats, says Wittgenstein.

Yeah, anyhow, says Sweezus, there are more cool things in Wingham.

He shows Arthur a picture of a long tallow wood log, propped up in Central Park in Wingham.

Sixteen metres long, says Sweezus, and 3.8 metres wide. Awesome.

Arthur looks less than excited.

In The Shiny Silver

Terence slides open the door of the camper.

Roo-Kai!

Roo-kai, who is sitting in Wittgenstein's Mazda, ignores him.

Roo-Kai! My parrot!

Roo-kai has been considering his position.

Perhaps it's time to go solo.

Roo-kai!

Roo-kai eases himself through the window of the Mazda.

He flies over to Terence at the door of the camper.

Guess what? says Terence. I found it!

My medal? Where was it? asks Roo-kai.

Under the water, says Terence. Under the tree  Under me.

Roo-kai tries to picture the scenario. 

Come in, says Terence. We're working out plans.

Roo-kai goes in.

Where were you? asks Gaius. We were worried.

In the Mazda, says Roo-kai.

How did you get in? asks Wittgenstein.

Through the window, says Roo-kai. You left it open.

I hope you shut it, says Wittgenstein.

What with? asks Roo-kai.

Is it still open? asks Wittgenstein. 

YES! says Terence. That's how he got out!

Wittgenstein dashes out of the camper and across to the Mazda.

He opens the door. 

Water flows out.

And several dead frogs.

Damn bird, says Wittgenstein, gathering the frogs.

He closes the window, and returns to the camper.

Full of water! he grumbles. And dead frogs. I hope I'm covered.

Can you still drive it? asks Gaius.

I think so, says Wittgenstein. 

Dead frogs! says Gaius. Interesting.

Let's see, says Coralie. 

Let ME see, says Terence.

They are dead frogs alright. Brown and shrivelled. 

They didn't die in the rain, says Coralie. Looks like chytrid fungus.

All too common, says Gaius. 

Where are MY frogs? asks Terence.

Here, says Tilly. In the corn chip packet.

Here we are! shouts Quiet-Tartus. In the shiny silver!

They were shivering, says Tilly. It's like a foil blanket.

Hey! says Sweezus, I've been eating those corn chips. How come no one told me the frogs were inside?

I'm sure you'd have noticed the difference, says Gaius.

Not funny, says Sweezus.

A Horse Would Know

Yes, but guess what? says Terence.

What? says Sweezus. 

I found my medal, says Terence. 

Where was it? asks Sweezus.

Under my horse, says Terence.

He means the branch he was sitting on, says Arthur.

Yeah? says Sweezus. We could use a horse now.

What for? asks Terence.

We could sit on it, says Sweezus. 

And go, says Arthur.

A horse would know the way back to the campsite, says Sweezus.

Don't you? asks Arthur.

Thought I did, says Sweezus. It looks different.

The waters are rising. The bushes look shorter. 

Arthur and Sweezus push through.

Terence is on Sweezus's shoulders.

He sees an arrow scratched into the bark of a pine tree.

Woop! says Terence. An arrow! We're saved!

Yeah, but where's the arrow pointing? asks Sweezus.

Home, says Terence. Maybe Tilly was trying to help us.

You reckon? asks Sweezus. It's too high. Maybe it was her mum.

It's the kind of thing she would do, says Arthur. She even had waders.

Yeah, I know, says Sweezus. And an umbrella.

Full of snakes, says Terence.

Frogs, says Arthur.

We'll go that way, says Sweezus. Terence, your job's to look for the next one.

Terence likes his job.

He sees lots of arrows.

They point lots of ways.

So Arthur, too, has to do it.

They are making some progress when Gaius appears.

There you are boys! I was worried!

Yay! says Terence.

You on the trail? asks Sweezus.

Indeed, says Gaius. It's under my feet somewhere. Make haste. We must move the camper to higher ground.

They wade back to the camper.

Wittgenstein is in it, with Coralie and Tilly.

We waited to make sure you got back safely, says Tilly. Did you find your bird's medal?

Yes, says Terence. Hey! Where is he?

A good question. 

Roo-kai hasn't been seen for some time.

Gutful Of Water

How did that get there? asks Terence.

The water took it, says Arthur. 

From me, says Terence. 

Funny how it was right under the branch you were sitting on, says Arthur.

Yes, says Terence. Maybe it fell out of my shorts.

Only if you had it, says Arthur. 

I didn't have it, says Terence.

Doesn't matter now, says Arthur. You've got it.

You have, says Terence.

And I'm keeping it, says Arthur. Until we get back to the camper.

Okay, says Terence. Can we go back now?

Yes, says Arthur. Do you remember the way?

Follow the trail, says Terence.

There is no trail, says Arthur.

There is only swirling water, and sad looking bushes and Bunyas.

Wah! cries Terence.

I think it was that way, says Arthur. Do you trust me?

No, says Terence.

You could stay in the tree, says Arthur.

NO! says Terence. He jumps down into the arms of Arthur.

Or that was the plan.

Arthur doesn't catch him. Terence disappears under water.

Blub blub.

Lucky Arthur didn't give him the medal.

Hey bro! shouts someone, from a direction which is not the one Arthur intended to take.

It can only be Sweezus.

It is.

I saw Coralie and Tilly, says Sweezus. They reckoned you were down here, you mad bugger. Where's Terence?

Arthur points downwards. 

He only just fell. He was in the pine tree until fifteen seconds ago.

Shit! says Sweezus. Where is he exactly?

There, says Arthur. Those are his toes.

Sweezus picks Terence up by them.

Guess what? says Terence.

We've all had a gutful of water, says Sweezus. Let's head back and get dry.

Drowned Looking

Tilly! says Coralie. What on earth are you doing out here?

Helping Terence look for his medal, says Tilly.

Mission aborted! says Coralie.

Okay, says Tilly. Bye Terence.

We can all go back together, says Coralie.

Not me, says Arthur. 

Arthur, says Coralie. Gaius said you were reliable.

I am reliable, says Arthur.

Me too, says Terence.

At least Terence is coming, says Coralie. Look at the poor little fellow.

Terence is up to the top of his legs now, in water.

His gecko shorts are ballooning.

I don't want to, says Terence. I'm staying with Arthur.

We'll take the frogs back, says Tilly. Where are they?

Up here! shouts Quiet-Tartus, from a branch of a Bunya.

We saw a snake! shouts Shorty-Tartus.

It won't hurt you, says Coralie. Jump down into my umbrella.

Woo! says Terence. Do it!

They jump. Boing!

It would have been fun, in other circumstances.

Last chance, says Coralie, turning.

We'll take the frogs back to Gaius, says Tilly. And we'll tell him you died looking for a medal that wasn't even yours.

I haven't died, says Terence.

But you're drowning, says Tilly.

Come on Tilly, says Coralie. Put these on.

She whips out a pair of small waders.

Tilly steps into them

The frogs are transferred to Tilly's umbrella, and they head off under Coralie's umbrella.

I'm drowning, says Terence.

You can't drown, says Arthur. Remember Lake Geneva.

Terence remembers. The fish, staring.

Get up in that tree, says Arthur. I'll look around a bit.

Can't, says Terence.

Arthur lifts him up to the branch recently vacated by the Tarti.

This is like a horse, says Terence. Hey! I saw something shiny.

Where? asks Arthur.

Under me, says Terence. In the water.

Arthur sees it. 

He picks up the medal.

That's Why I'm Here

Arthur arrives at the upturned red and white spotted umbrella.

He picks it up.

Leave it! says Tilly.

It's for snakes, says Terence.

They are standing beside the trail, on a rock.

Okay, says Arthur. He puts down the umbrella.

Snakes! says Quiet-Tartus. How many?

We saw one, says Tilly. It was swimming towards us.

What did you do? asks Arthur.

Tried to prong it! says Terence.

Did NOT! says Tilly.

Where's Gaius? asks Terence.

Not coming, says Arthur. That's why I'm here.

Yippee! says Terence. You won't make us go back!

Does my mum know? asks Tilly.

Roo-kai would have told her, says Terence.

So let's go, says Arthur. 

What about the umbrella? asks Quiet-Tartus.

I don't want it, says Tilly. 

There might be more snakes, says Arthur.

Bring it, says Quiet-Tartus.

Arthur grabs it. It was floating away.

The rain is not stopping. The water is knee deep on Terence.

Could you carry me? asks Terence.

No, says Arthur. Keep going. 

I hope my medal floats by, says Terence.

Will it float? asks Tilly.

Yes, says Terence. Everyone, look out for it.

What does it look like? asks Tilly.

A medal, says Terence. On a French ribbon.

Red, white and blue, says Tilly. Is that it over there?

A red, white and blue ribbon is hooked round a half-submerged myrtle.

YES! cries Terence.

Arthur unhooks it.

It's just the ribbon. The medal is missing.

We have to keep looking, says Terence.

The waters are rising! says Quiet-Tartus.

We should go back, says Tilly.

Arthur knows this. But he likes being out in a rain storm with water rising around him and a lost medal which could be anywhere.

What's your mum's number? asks Arthur.

Tilly tells him. He calls it.

Hello! says Coralie. 

Can you come and get Tilly? asks Arthur.

I'm right behind you, says Coralie.

Arthur turns.

A much larger red and white spotted umbrella is approaching, held aloft by a woman in waders.

They Do Shut their Eyes

The tree frogs are quite fit now.

They soon catch up with Arthur.

We're coming with you, says Quiet-Tartus.

As long as you use your own steam, says Arthur.

We can show you the way, says Shorty-Tartus.

I know the way, says Arthur. I just follow the trail to the creek.

The rain is pelting down.

The trail is slushy. 

The paper barks are soggy.

The hairy achronichia are dank and dripping.

The Bunya pines are weighed down and wet.

Want a Tiny Teddy? asks Arthur.

What's a Tiny Teddy? asks Quiet-Tartus.

A tiny biscuit shaped like a teddy, says Arthur.

No thanks, says Quiet-Tartus. If it was shaped like an insect or a spider or a cricket or a lizard or a cockroach we might be interested.

Or another frog, says Shorty-Tartus.

Yes, says Quiet-Tartus. Or another frog.

They make Tiny Freddos, says Arthur. But they'd still taste the same.

That's an interesting concept, says Quiet-Tartus.

But obvious, says Arthur. Why are you coming?

We want to see the medal, says Quiet-Tartus. And forget about our nightmares.

The water on the path is ankle deep now. The frogs need to hop high.

Hop splosh hop splosh, it's tiring.

I didn't know frogs had nightmares, says Arthur.

Clinging to snakes, says Shorty-Tartus. How would you like it?

Wouldn't mind, says Arthur. Where are the snakes?

In a rain tank, says Shorty-Tartus. With us and two mice.

It's a dream, right? says Arthur.

A nightmare, says Shorty-Tartus.

Do frogs sleep? asks Arthur.

We think so, says Quiet-Tartus. We were going to ask Gaius.

He'd know, says Arthur. But I can find out.

He takes his phone out of his pocket, and types in the question.

No one knows, says Arthur. Not enough research. But they do shut their eyes.

We know that, says Quiet-Tartus. And we worry.

That's good enough, says Arthur.

He can see what looks like a red and white spotted umbrella up ahead.

But it's upside down, floating.

He speeds up. 

Not everyone leads a charmed life.

Only If It's True

Roo-kai has been listening.

Don't just go off, says Roo-kai.

What? says Terence.

You should let Gaius know where you're going, says Roo-kai.

You tell him, says Terence. We're in a hurry. We lost something.

I know, says Roo-kai. It was my medal.

Why was it yours? asks Tilly.

He got it spying for the French government, says Terence. But he lets me wear it.

It was a bit showy, says Roo-kai. And it dangled annoyingly, when I was digging for molluscs.

That makes sense, says Tilly. 

Shall I tell your mother you're going with Terence? asks Roo-kai.

Err.... yes, but could you tell her we're going with a grownup? says Tilly.

Only if it's true, says Roo-kai.

Tell Gaius to follow us, says Terence.

Okay, says Roo-kai.

Terence and Tilly set off in the rain, under the red and white spotted umbrella. 

Aren't you frogs going? asks Roo-kai.

We'll wait for Gaius, says Quiet-Tartus. We want to ask him a question.

Suit yourselves, says Roo-kai.

He goes across to the camper. Taps on the door. It slides open.

Come in out of the rain, says Gaius. Is Terence with you?

No, says Roo-kai. He's gone back to Knappinghat Creek with Tilly.

Jumping Jupiter! says Gaius. In this rain storm?

He wants you to follow him, says Roo-kai.

Gaius had been about to start on his second cup of tea. Sweezus had just opened a packet of Tiny Teddies.

I'll go, says Arthur. 

Excellent, says Gaius.

Good on you, bro, says Sweezus. Take some Tiny Teddies.

Arthur grabs a handful of Tiny Teddies, and heads off down the Five Islands trail.

Wait for us! cry the two Screaming Tree Frogs.

But Arthur doesn't.

Is Gaius coming? cries Quiet Tartus,

No! squawks Roo-kai. Catch up with Arthur!

Quiet-Tartus looks at Shorty-Tartus. 

They don't have to go.

They could go into the camper and ask Gaius their question.

Or they could follow Arthur who is following Terence who is on a quest with Tilly under a red and white spotted umbrella to find a medal that may or may not have dropped into Knappinghat Creek.

Which is more exciting.

The rain beats down heavily. Psshhh!

They follow Arthur.

Forgetting The Snake

Now we'll have nightmares, says Quiet-Tartus.

We will, says Shorty-Tartus.

Me too, says Terence. What will yours be?

Clinging to a dangerous snake in a rain tank, says Quiet-Tartus. 

With two mice, says Shorty-Tartus.

What two mice? asks Quiet-Tartus.

Us and two mice, says Shorty-Tartus. All clinging on to the snake.

Do snakes eat mice first or frogs first? asks Terence.

We don't know, says Shorty-Tartus. It'd be scary for all of us.

Including the snake, says Tilly. That's why it won't eat you.

Or the mice, says Terence. 

I'll still have nightmares, says Quiet-Tartus.

Sorry, says Tilly. Would you like me to sing you a song?

No, they wouldn't, says Terence.

Yes, we would, says Shorty-Tartus. 

One about tree frogs, says Quiet-Tartus.

This song is about speckled frogs, says Tilly. 

She sings Five Little Speckled Frogs, which she remembers singing in kindergarten.

The five little speckled frogs jump into the pond one by one until there are no little frogs left on the speckled log.

Did a snake eat them? asks Quiet-Tartus.

Of course not, says Tilly.

Try another one, says Terence.

Tilly tries to remember another one.

There's one about a frog jumping out of the pond one day and finding himself in the rain. 

I know that one, says Terence.

Is there a snake in it? asks Shorty-Tartus.

No, says Tilly. The frog thinks he might catch a cold so he jumps back in again.

What's a cold? asks Quiet-Tartus.

It's a virus, says Tilly. 

Not a snake, says Terence. Who wants to know what my nightmare will be?

No one, says Tilly. We should talk about dreams. My dream is to be an ornithologist. What's yours, Terence?

A horse, says Terence. But I'm not going to get one.

So that's more like a nightmare, says Quiet-Tartus. A horse you don't get.

How would that go? asks Shorty-Tartus. Wouldn't it be boring. What would happen?

Nothing, says Tilly. Why do you want a horse anyway?

Because, says Terence, see this medal?

He looks down at his chest where the Chevalier des Clandestines medal should be hanging on a ribbon.

It isn't.

Wah! says Terence. I've lost my medal!

Maybe it fell off when you fell into Knappinghat Creek, says Tilly.

I'm going back there, says Terence.

I'll come with you, says Tilly. Are you frogs coming?

Yes they are coming. 

At least they've forgotten the snake.

Don't Know Do Know

Gaius lets the frogs out of the camper.

Then he pours four cups of tea.

What about me? asks Terence.

A Fruit Box, says Sweezus. Where'd I put it?

With the corn chips, says Arthur. 

Yes, there it is, behind the open packet of corn chips.

Now everyone has something.

What if we drive inland? asks Wittgenstein. 

What good would that do? asks Gaius.

Avoid the worst of the flooding says Wittgenstein.

No, says Gaius. I think we should just sit it out here. The rain won't last forever.

Yeah, says Sweezus. And anyhow, we can surf in the rain.

What can I do? asks Terence.

Train your frogs, says Arthur. Work out a training program.

I already did, says Terence. Give me those pebbles.

He takes them outside.

Hey! says Terence. Where are the girl frogs?

Gone off, says Quiet-Tartus.

When we told them we weren't going to Queensland, says Shorty-Tartus.

But we are, says Terence. As soon as the rain stops.

Quiet-Tartus looks at the sky.

It won't be stopping.

Frogs don't know, says Terence.

Frogs do know, says Quiet-Tartus.

Terence looks glum.

Tilly walks up with a red and white spotted umbrella.

She's wearing gumboots.

Can I get my socks back? asks Tilly.

They might be ruined, says Terence.

Oh, says Tilly. 

Arthur used a knife, says Quiet-Tartus.

Guess what, says Terence. We're not going.

We're not going either, says Tilly. Everywhere's flooded. At least frogs like the water.

We don't like it that much, says Quiet-Tartus. We're tree frogs.

I forgot, says Tilly. What happens if you fall into a rain tank?

Frogs never fall into rain tanks, says Shorty-Tartus.

And the water is rising, says Tilly, because of the rain.

Panic! says Quiet-Tartus.

It gets worse, says Tilly. Suddenly you see a dangerous brown snake swimming beside you.

Yikes! says Shorty-Tartus. Now what?

You cling to the snake until you all get rescued, says Tilly.

How come you know, and they don't know? asks Terence.

It's just a story, says Tilly.

Just a story. But the tree frogs have swallowed it whole.