The Twenty First Century

Your mistress! cried Gaius. What are you thinking of, Gustave? This is the twenty first century! You must reconsider!

Oh alright, said Gustave, who had already reconsidered. He sat down. What would you like to do now?

Let's go to the Lyrics Bar and have another drink, said Gaius. On you.

No, on you, said Gustave, standing up again. Those tickets were worth quite a lot.

They walked over to the Lyrics Bar and sat down at a table. Gaius ordered two cabaret cabernets, and a platter of cheese.

I really shouldn't be eating this cheese, said Gustave. I've been putting on weight lately.

Lately, scoffed Gaius. You've been portly for as long as I've known you. You should do more excercise.

I've been thinking of taking up cycling again, said Gustave.

Indeed? So have I, said Gaius. We should do it together.

Done! said Gustave. Let us begin first thing in the morning. Who knows, by next month we may be fit enough for the Tour de France!

The Tour de France, said Gaius, doubtfully. That's ambitious.

Yes, we could get up a team, what shall we call ourselves? Umm... What do you and I have in common?

We are both famous writers, said Gaius.

So we are, said Gustave. Very famous. But I am a serious novelist while your subject is outdated natural history.

What is that supposed to mean? asked Gaius, annoyed. I've been famous a lot longer than you.

Just saying, said Gustave. Don't mind me, old friend. Help me think of a name.

Team Bumptious, said Gaius.