The Picky Bike

Sweezus and Baby Pierre ride their bikes to the Kiln Park.

Choose a tree, says Sweezus. They're all pretty good here.

Baby Pierre's bike doesn't think so. 

Baby Pierre whizzes from tree to tree.

How about this one? shouts Sweezus.

Which one? shouts Baby Pierre.

He zooms across to the tree in question.

Photogenic bark, says Sweezus. Nice contrasts.

You may think so, says Baby Pierre, but my bike has different requirements.

Like, what? asks Sweezus.

Straight up and down, says Baby Pierre. No sticky-out bits. Especially at the bottom. And no bugs.

Why do you care about bugs? asks Sweezus.

It's not me, it's my bike, says Baby Pierre. I'm okay with bugs.

As a matter of interest, says Sweezus, how do you know what your bike thinks of bugs?

Watch this, says Baby Pierre. 

He leans his bike against the photogenic tree with the contrasts. And bugs.

The bike remains immobile.

What's meant to happen? asks Sweezus.

It's already happened, says Baby Pierre.

Sweezus can't see that anything has happened.

It must be kind of minimal, says Sweezus. But if you want to pick another tree, go ahead.

How about a lamp post? asks Baby Pierre. They're smooth. My bicycle loves them

Lamp posts? says Sweezus. How come?

Just does, says Baby Pierre. Want us to get behind this one?

Okay, says Sweezus. You get behind it. I'll stand here.

Baby Pierre wheels his tiny bicycle behind the lamp post.

Wheel out further! says Sweezus. No, not that far! Back a bit. Okay. Awesome.

He takes a photo.

How does it look? asks Baby Pierre

Cool, says Sweezus. You can just see the green curve of your front wheel.

Baby Pierre looks.

Good one! 

Oh shit! says Sweezus. I just thought of something.

What? asks Baby Pierre.

Lamp post, next to a lagoon in Melaleuca, miles from anywhere? says Sweezus. Dead giveaway.

Oo yes, says Baby Pierre. You'll have to fix it.

Like yeah, turn the lamp post into a tree, says Sweezus. You could've just got behind a real one.

Do they have toilets in Melaleuca? asks Baby Pierre.

He has just spotted the public toilets, next to the playground.

Dunno, says Sweezus.

But it hardly matters.

Baby Pierre's bike doesn't want to go near them.