Wednesday, November 16, 2016

'If So' Has An Answer

The spider stops lowering, and just hangs there.

In the dark, Nina and Baby Pierre keep on talking.

But you must have a mother, whispers Nina.

That's true, thinks the spider.

No, says Baby Pierre.

He doesn't want to speak of his mother, Pierre, and her crazy ideas.

The spider doesn't believe Baby Pierre's answer.

Buena noces! says the spider. 

Nina turns the torch on.

Spider! says Nina. Courage, Baby Pierre!

What? Am I expected to bite him or something? says the spider. I'm not stupid. I came down with a question, that's all.

Who for? asks Baby Pierre.

You, says the spider. Will you answer?

Yes, says Baby Pierre. If you answer a question from me, in return.

All right, says the spider.

Good move, Baby Pierre, says Nina. Let the spider go first.

My question is, says the spider, how can anyone deny having a mother? Is it, by chance, because she has crazy ideas?

That is two questions, says Baby Pierre. And yes is the answer.

To which question? asks the spider.

You are pushing your luck, says Nina. Let him ask you one.

Okay, says the spider.

(This is your chance, Baby Pierre. You are on Tenerife. You came here with one purpose. To assist Daniel O'Connell (in spite of his neglectful behaviour), with finding his relatives).

Are you......says Baby Pierre.....a Black Jumping Spider, and if so....

Is this going to be two questions? asks the spider.

You can't ask that, says Nina. It's another question.

Just answer 'if so', says Baby Pierre.

How do I answer that? says the spider. There is no answer to 'if so'.

This is crazy, says Nina.

Like his mother, says the spider.

Like you, says Baby Pierre.  And like Nina's grandma, Maricruz. 

What? says Nina. Grandma isn't crazy. 

Sending us out here in the dark to the spiders, mutters Baby Pierre.

Yoo hoo! cries Maricruz, from the upstairs window. Feebee's asleep now. Come inside for a chocolate a la taza.

Does she mean me as well? asks the spider.

Want to find out? asks Nina.

They all go inside, hopeful.

........

Ying's poem has had an effect. 

A couple of locals join them at their table.

Are you all poets? asks Sebastián.

Nope, says Sweezus. I'm a writer and tweeter. Arthur's a poet. Ying's got a Masters in something.

Environmental Management and Sustainability, says Ying. But we're here on a mission.

Qué es? asks Valentina.

Looking for Black Jumping Spiders, says Ying. 

And postcards, says Arthur. We need ten thousand, and so far we've got five.

Yeah and four of them are cactus, says Sweezus.

Have you still got them? asks Ying.

Yep, says Sweezus. 

Valentina can give you one, says Sebastián. 

Si, says Valentina. This one has parrots.

She takes an old postcard out of her handbag. Loro Parque, where they have parrots.

Thanks, says Ying. I'll take that. These guys are hopeless.

Valentina looks at the two guys who are said to be hopeless.

To her they look deep and intellectual.

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