Rest Day: Picnic with Professor Freud

It is the second rest day of the Tour. Team Philosophe, Team Bumptious, Belle et Bonne, Marie and Professor Freud have spread their picnic in a field of flowers outside Montpellier. All except Farky have already tossed down a few glasses of Blanquette de Limoux. Professor Freud is explaining the psychology of Yukio Mishima to anyone who cares to listen.

Professor Freud: Of course, it was all because his grandmother, a woman prone to morbid and violent outbursts, took him away from his family at a very young age, kept him out of the sunlight and only allowed him to play with his girl cousins and their dolls.

Belle et Bonne: You don't say! Here Professor, have a pebradou.

Professor Freud: Thank you my dear. What is this again? A stuffed bun?

Marie: No that's not the stuffed bun. That comes later. This is an aperitif cake. Have a splash more of Blanquette to go with it.

Le Bon David: I'll have more too, Marie. It's a jolly good drop.

Sweezus: This is brilliant! What a day! What a picnic! What's this yellow meat?

Farky: I already asked. It's Duck a la Limoux. Duck with saffron and garlic. Yucky duck.

Sweezus: But I thought you liked duck. Is it the garlic? You can eat a mint afterwards.

Gustave: Yes Farky, a mint will get rid of garlic breath.

Gaius: Yes it will, it's been a tried and true method since Roman times.

Farky: I know you humans think so, but it doesn't work for dogs. In fact, let me tell you something, it doesn't work that well for humans either....

Professor Freud: ....and then, when he went back to live with his family, his father, a strict military disciplinarian, used to hold him up to speeding trains, and raid his room to search for poetry. A classic case.....

Violetta: A classic case of what, Professor?

Professor Freud: Of someone who becomes fascinated by death of course.

Violetta: Who are we talking about?

The VeloDrone: Molly is it? The dachshund. May I try that Cremant, Belle dear?

Le Bon David: Me too, while you've got the bottle there, Belle.

Belle et Bonne: Molly isn't fascinated by death. She just got confused by the authorial voice.

Farky: Is that what it was? Did you and Marie think the same?

Violetta: The same as what?

Farky: That the text was written by a madman.

Violetta: I have to read this book.

Marie: We thought that it would have been best not to know anything at all about the author, either before or after reading it.

Violetta: Well, thank you Professor.

Professor Freud: What have I done? And when are we having this stuffed bun?

Stage 15: Limoux to Montpellier

It is windy on the route from Limoux to Montpellier, but at least there are no steep climbs. Some of the riders are chatting amongst themselves.

Mark Cavendish: Hey, Contador! Do you ever feed your dog garlic?

Alberto Contador: Si! Claro! We eat lots of garlic.

Mark Cavendish: What about your dog, Cadel?

Cadel Evans: Pfffft! Never touch it. Why?

Mark Cavendish: Oh, nothing. Just wondered if it's good for dogs.

Thomas Voeckler: Hee Hee! It would be no good for yours.

Mark Cavendish: That's not funny, Thomas. Bugger off!

......

Meanwhile, Belle et Bonne and Marie are shopping in Limoux for the picnic tomorrow, when who should they see in the cake shop but their friend Professor Freud.

Belle et Bonne: Professor! It's lovely to see you again. How are you enjoying the Tour?

Professor Freud: There are too many fools on the sidelines.

Marie: That just makes it more fun.

Professor Freud: And none of my friends are here.

Belle et Bonne: Oh poor Professor Freud! Would you like to come to our picnic tomorrow?

Professor Freud: Picnic? Why thank you my dear. I should love to. Are these some of the things we will be having?

Belle et Bonne: Yes. We thought we'd buy lots of Limoux specialties. We'll start with some peradou, an aperitif cake, then we'll have some artichoke with salted liver, and some Limouxine duck, some Limos, which is a sort of stuffed bun, and finish off with some tap, which is chocolate.

Marie: And to drink, we'll have the local white wines, Blanquette de Limoux, and Crement de Limoux.

Professor Freud: I look forward to it. And perhaps we shall find time to discuss Yukio Mishima's book? Have you both finished it?

Marie: Yes we have. Now we understand how Molly the dachshund felt while she was reading it.

Professor Freud: A dog's view! That will be of great interest to me.