How To Broaden The Gene Pool

I hear sobbing, says a Third Ager called Beverley.

Me too, says her friend Brenda. It's coming from that box.

Several Third Agers gather round the box to look in.

It's a cuttlefish! says Beverley. Outrageous! Who does this box belong to? You, young man? This is a No Take Area. Take that cuttlefish back to the sea right this minute!

She glowers at Arthur.

He won't go, says Arthur.

What nonsense, says Brenda. Cuttlefish can't have an opinion. So this is your box?

Madam, says Gaius. This box belongs to Victor, your policeman. It is a box for the storage of confiscated goods, as you see. It was stolen from the police station earlier, and found to be full of dead cuttlefish. These young people here rescued the only cuttlefish still showing signs of life. This one. They named him the Twitcher. He refuses to go back in the sea, as he fears he is the only one left of his kind. Therefore he has made up his mind to come with us to Turkey.

Beverley and Brenda and the other Third Agers are gobsmacked. But only for a moment.

How wonderful! says Beverley. Turkey!

She bends down to poke at the Twitcher.

Oooh! says the Twitcher. Am I in Turkey?

No sweetheart, says Beverley kindly, but you will be there soon. These kind people are taking you there.

Madam, if only that were so, says Gaius. But it is a matter of funding.

Funding! says Beverley, looking at Brenda.

Brenda nods sagely.

We country women, says Brenda, know all about funding. How much do you need?

Several thousands, says Gaius vaguely, but there is no need......

Yes there is! says Bunny. It would be amazing of you ladies to help us. Poor little Twitcher wants to go to Turkey so badly.

Why, as a matter of interest? asks Beverley.

Oh......, says Bunny

There are cuttlefish there, says Arthur. Special, orange and red ones. He wants to broaden the gene pool.

Arthur, says Gaius. I believe you are making that up.