Fastest Reincarnation Ever

Sorry, Terence, says Arthur. I wasn't trying to cut her head off.

What were you trying? asks Terence.

I was trying to saw through the radio collar, says Arthur. But a Swiss Army knife can be tricky. See, I was sawing the collar with the small blade, but the corkscrew collapsed and the pliers popped out, then the wire stripper stripped off a few feathers when the chisel sprang up, which meant the large blade was sticking out at a right angle.

And you didn't realise that you were SAWING HER HEAD OFF, says Terence. You're an idiot!

It may be all for the best, says Arthur.

Terence picks up the head of his peacock. The eyes are staring in horror.

Her eyes are staring in horror, says Terence. This will haunt me for the rest of my life.

Gaius will fix it, says Arthur.

What's this? says Gaius. What's happened?

Arthur cut off my parrot's head, says Terence. And it's staring in horror.

I'll fix that, says Gaius. Give it to me.

Gaius places the peacock's head on the table and gently closes its eyelids.

And Arthur said it was all for the BEST, says Terence.

Did he? says Vello. Arthur, you would make a fine Doctor Pangloss.

It's actually all for the WORST, says Terence.

Wasn't it a Hindu? says Arthur.

We both were, says Terence.

Then it will be reincarnated, says Arthur.

What does that mean? asks Terence.

Come back, says Arthur. As something. Maybe a real parrot. Maybe a person. Or even a bee.

A bee? Ssü-K'ung Shu smiles at the thought of the peacock coming back as a bee.

(Even though it wouldn't be funny)

When? asks Terence, picking up the head and staring at it intently.

Terence, says Vello, that is not how reincarnation works. The peacock is finished. You must wait for it to be reborn into another body.

Ridiculous, says Gaius.

Just humouring him, says Vello. No doubt you have your own foolish beliefs about what happens after.

I do not, says Gaius. And nor did he, until you and Arthur put ideas in his .....

Sweezus appears in the doorway.

He's here! cries Terence. My parrot! Oh my parrot. Was it bad being dead? Look at you, you had your head cut off. That's you on the table.

Freak me out! says Sweezus. What's happened in here?

Peacock's dead, says Arthur. And I did it without upsetting Terence. He's happy.

And it's true. Terence is happy his parrot has come back as Sweezus and not as a bee.