Tour de France Practice

The next day Gaius had Tour de France practice.

He met The Velodrone and the rest of Team Philosophe in Norwood.

There was Sweezus, but where was Le Bon David? And who was the other young man?

Hello Gaius, said Sweezus. Did you have a good holiday?

Yes, thank you, said Gaius, looking around. Where's David?

Gaius! said The Velodrone. Didn't I tell you? David's pulled out. Says he's getting too old. Nonsense of course, he's merely overweight. But now I want you to meet our newest team member, Arthur. Arthur Rimbaud.

Gaius looked at Arthur Rimbaud. He was young, wild-haired and handsome, with a dirty bandage wrapped round his left knee.

Arthur Rimbaud, said Gaius. Pleased to meet you. Your name rings a bell.

You'll have read my poems, said Arthur Rimbaud.

No, I haven't said Gaius.

Everyone has, said Arthur Rimbaud.

I haven't, said Gaius. Perhaps Margaret has. I know someone has. Maybe it was that pinhead Ouvert.

Arthur Rimbaud looked slightly annoyed.

Well, said Gaius, looking around, what's the game plan this year?

First, said The VeloDrone, Arthur must rest his knee. Second, we must practice a bit. Third, we must get to Liège by next Saturday.

What's wrong with his knee? asked Gaius.

Recurring pain, said Arthur Rimbaud. I may lose it one day.

The knee? asked Sweezus.

Possibly, said Arthur Rimbaud. But until then I am sustained by the blue and yellow phosphorescent waves of anguish and unimaginable pain, and...

Steady on, young Arthur, said the Velodrone. Why don't you sit down.

Arthur Rimbaud sat down.

You three carry on, he said. Don't mind me.

And so began the first practice of Team Philosophe for the Tour de France.