Science, Or Disaster On Disaster

Sweezus and Grandpa Karl Marx have appeared like a vision on the boardwalk.

Marx is dressed in brown overalls.

Sweezus is wearing his faithful old Bender Mash shorts, and a new khaki tee shirt sporting the logo Held Der Arbeit.

Man! says Surfing with Whales. Held der Arbeit! How come?

How come what? says Sweezus.

Hero of the Workers, says Surfing-With-Whales.

Awesome, says Sweezus, who hadn't bothered to ask Marx to translate the German.

What brings you here? asks Gaius. Although I must say, the more the merrier. Have you brought spoons?

I have not brought a spoon, says Marx. Spoons should be supplied to the workers.

They would be, says Gaius, But someone has to bring them.

Arthur, says Sweezus. Guess what?

You're channelling Terence, says Arthur.

Shit. Terence! says Sweezus. Forgot he'd be here. How's it going with Terence?

He's discovering science, says Arthur.

That's good, says Sweezus. Science is cool.

Yeah, says Surfing-With-Whales, who also likes science.

Science can be seen as a revolutionary force, says Marx.

I wouldn't go that far, says Surfing-With-Whales.

Terence stops jiggling his jar of green slime and comes over.

Let me see, says Marx. Green slime. And quite smelly. I remember when I studied agronomic chemistry under Liebig, he had a theory about the exhaustion of the soil.

It's not exhausted, says Terence. Look it's moving.

Tell you what, says Marx. If you eat it, I'll tell you a story.

Ying looks up from her careful spooning.

That's outrageous! says Ying. Don't do it, Terence.

But Terence is already doing it.

Respect! says Stew.

Well, says Gaius, standing up and rubbing his lower back, if you haven't come to help but to tell anecdotes and make ridiculous bargains with children...... what have you come for?

A holiday, says Sweezus. We finished the article. I got paid. We decided to come. Marx wants to study the business model at Dismal, and I'm going surfing.

In a stinky old swamp, says Terence. You're mental. I'm not growing up to be mental.

Surfing at Marrawah, says Sweezus. On the north west coast. There's wicked surfing.

Can I come? says Terence.

You won't be going anywhere, says Ying. You're all grey and ashen.

I am grey and ashen, says Terence. It's called cement, stupid.

And there was another reason, prompts Marx. To do with ownership rights.

Oh yeah, says Sweezus. You guys took Katherine's car. She wants it back pronto.

Dear me, says Gaius. That is inconvenient. She can't have it.

She is having it, says Sweezus. We saw Unni and Rosamunda at the top of the Giant Slide. They've already headed off back to Devonport.

If this is not enough of a disaster, at the very same moment, Terence falls into a coma.