Without Torture No Science

In the Low Down.

Arthur is moodily drinking cold drip and eating his muffin.

Aleksander wonders if now is a good time to ask:

May I look at your skewer?

All right, says Arthur.

Aleksander likes the look of the skewer

He sniffs it.

Sniiffff. Mm. He also likes the marine smell of the skewer.

I was thinking, says Arthur, of making it look like a prayer stick with feathers.

I have feathers, says Aleksander.

On you? says Arthur.

No, says Aleksander. Back at the theatre. Want to come with me?

Okay, says Arthur. He has nothing better to do until Gaius and Sweezus turn up, which could be as late as tomorrow.

Are you in a play? asks Arthur, as they walk down Hay Street.

A ballet, says Aleksander. I'm with the Moscow Ballet. We're performing Sleeping Beauty tonight. I should NOT have had that muffin.

Sleeping Beauty, says Arthur, I know that one. Do you play the prince?

No such luck, says Aleksander. Just a courtier. Here we are. Let's go round the back.

They enter the Regent Theatre through a low dirty doorway. Aleksander leads the way to the costume department.

A bony hand reaches out to grab Arthur.

.........

It's the hand of the evil fairy Carabosse.

Not really her. And the hand is not really bony, just painted with greasepaint.

Excellent work, Aleksander, says the evil fairy Carabosse.

Without torture no science, says Aleksander.

Arthur rightly supposes that this is an old Russian aphorism.

The spindle! says Carabosse. Hand it over.

Does she mean that she wants to have a look at the skewer?

Yes. And she doesn't wait to be given it.

Perfect, says the evil fairy Carabosse. What do you want for it?

Feathers, says Arthur. I was lured here by the promise of feathers.

Feathers! We have plenty of feathers, cackles Carabosse. Take your pick, boy!

Arthur picks out a red and a black one.

Deal, says Arthur. I guess you've lost your one.

Quite right, says Carabosse. You've saved our bacon. Princess can't die without a spindle. And this is the deadliest one I've seen in all my days of touring.

Will I get it back? says Arthur. Because if  not, there's no point having the feathers.

No, you won't, says Aleksander. But we have a whole pile of steel knitting needles. And you can have as many as you like.

No, says Carabosse. Not that many. We need them for the Confiscation of Sharp Pointy Objects Scene. He can just have a handful.

This seems like a good deal to Arthur. Steel knitting needles. A handful. As well as the feathers.

Good luck with the performance, says Arthur.

Would you like a free ticket? asks Aleksander.

Thanks, says Arthur, thinking perhaps he can sell it.