Nature Comes Good

Sweezus tries on his costume.

Everything fits.

He wonders how Belle knew his sizes.

Gaius comes in.

How are we progressing? asks Gaius.

No one answers. They're watching Sweezus's feet.

The white soles of his metallic gold shoes flash green and purple with every movement.

I wonder, says Vello, if we might all wear shoes like that?

No papa, says Belle. And not you, particularly. Your character Martin's a pessimist.

An extreme pessimist, says David, whereas Pangloss...

Not you either, says Belle. We want Candide to stand out from the others.

Nevertheless I might buy some for my own use, says Vello.

Great, says Belle. Remind me not to go out with you. Hello Gaius. We have something to ask you.

Not changed your minds about the vacuum cleaner, I hope, says Gaius. I've taken it home.

No, says David. How are you at pratfalls?

Gaius informs them he is an expert at pratfalls.

Good, says Sweezus. You'll be tripping on string.

And going unconscious, says Terence, because I pressed my stink button. And then you go up on a rope and I plant some oranges. Red ones.

Wait! says Gaius. Oranges. In the sink hole?

Sweezus has been jogging on the spot, to check out the lighting. He stops jogging.

Now what?

You wouldn't plant oranges in a sink hole, says Gaius. They need a sunny well drained area, and at least six hour of sun every day.

Plant them at the top then, says Belle.

Sweezus looks grateful.

Yeah, says Sweezus. Plant them at the top.

What will I eat? asks Terence. I'm at the bottom.

You won't be eating oranges in a hurry, says Gaius. It's three years to produce oranges from grafted root stock and fifteen from seeds.

Fifteen oranges? says Terence.

Fifteen years, says Gaius. Gardening is a long term proposition. My own garden attests to it. This year I enjoyed a small crop of asparagus, after seven years of nothing.

Okay, says Sweezus. We can get round this. Terence stays at the bottom. Paquette goes to market and buys a box of oranges to keep everyone going while they figure out what to do.

I can't carry a whole box of oranges, says Celia.

You won't have to, says Belle. It can happen off stage. The box of oranges will appear at the top of the sink hole, beside you.

But I'm at the bottom, says Terence.

Terence, says Belle, if you are at the bottom and the oranges are at the top, and that is a problem, there are two ways to solve it.

More than two, says David.

Okay, says Belle. More than two. But the point is, we can solve it.

Sweezus sits down and watches his LED lights stop flashing.

Three ways to solve the oranges. Not long ago there were no oranges. Heavy.

Scene three, says Vello. Let's progress to scene three. Thoughts anyone?

What about ...... it's fifteen years in the future, says Sweezus. And there's oranges dropping into the sink hole from above. And Terence is eating them. It's kind of ..... like, nature comes good.

BUT, says Terence, I'm a really old stink bug, and I haven't got any teeth.

Even worse, says Gaius. For you anyway. You would have died years ago.

Wah! wails Terence.

But, says Sweezus. You can play a descendent.

What's that? asks Terence. Another sink hole in the sink hole?

He's sharp, says Vello.

No, says Sweezus. A grandchild of the stink bug. Or a great grandchild, whatever. And you can wear the same costume.

Yay! says Terence. I'm still in it!