Stiff

The women of Roman Britain used a foundation made of animal fat, starch and tin oxide, said Pliny the Elder, this morning.

Well, I said. How come you didn't know that yesterday?

I did, said Pliny. I forgot.

That happens, I agreed. Foundation, you say? So it wasn't a lipstick.

No, said Pliny. It was a face whitener.

Then what's it doing in my shimmering brown Dangerous Diva?

Shimmering, said Pliny.

Was it poisonous? I asked.

I don't know, said Pliny, But I believe it used to set quite stiffly on their faces.

That would have been the starch. How is it we know what the ingredients were?

A little pot of grayish cream was dug up in south London, said Pliny. It had fingermarks on the lid, and in the cream. It dated back to the second century AD.

How did they know what it was for?

At first they thought it might be toothpaste, but....

But?

They analysed the ingredients and decided it must have been a facial cream. Either that or...

Yes?

A cream for smearing on to sacrificial goats.