Worse If Anything

On the beach at Saint Kilda, Gaius waits for Victor to return with the captives.

I wonder why he's taking so long, says Gaius

Would you like me to look for them? asks Roo-kai.

That'd be helpful, says Gaius. I would like my bike back.

And Terence, says Roo-kai.

Yes, of course, Terence, says Gaius. 

Roo-kai flies north.

Gaius watches him go.

I wish I could do errands, says Waca.

Keep an eye out, says Gaius. 

What for? asks Waca.

Their return, says Gaius.

What will you do? asks Waca.

Read my notes, says Gaius. 

Flip flip. He flips through the pages.

I wish I could read, says Waca.

I'll read aloud, says Gaius. 

The orange-bellied parrot is one of only three migratory parrot species in the world, reads Gaius.

Lucky them! thinks Waca. 

He sinks into a reverie.

Meanwhile Roo-kai has spotted the police car in the distance.

Should he circle? 

Why not?

He circles.

Look at that! Roo-kai's come to meet us, says Victor.

He stops the police car.

Roo-kai lands on the bonnet.

Off! yelps Victor.

Roo-kai is astonished.

Plop!

Victor gets out of the police car.

A thousand pardons, says Roo-kai. You gave me a shock. 

Tch! says Victor. Will you wipe it off or shall I?

You, says Roo-kai. I have nothing to do it with.

Victor reaches into the glove box of the police car where there should be some tissues.

But no. There are none, and in any case, a sponge would be better.

There should be a sponge in the boot. 

Roo-kai! shouts Terence. You're back! Come and look at my drawings.

May I? asks Roo-kai.

All right, says Victor. Get in. 

Roo-kai flutters in. Camus gets out.

Need a hand wiping the shit off? asks Camus.

Just looking for a sponge, says Victor.

Sea water'll do it, says Camus. You don't need a sponge. 

Salt water is bad for police cars, says Victor.

You can swish it again with spring water when we see Gaius, says Camus. He has plenty.

Okay, says Victor. Hand me that bottle.

Camus hands him the police water bottle, which contains the sea water he collected earlier. 

Victor sloshes it over the bird poo.

The small neat poo disintegrates and spreads in random white dribbles dotted with gritty black spots.

If anything, that's worse, says Victor.

Let's get going, says Camus.

They get into the police car.

In the back seat, Terence is showing Roo-kai the two black fart shapes.

Roo-kai has already guessed what they are.