Stage 11: Blaye-les-Mines to Lavaur

Belle et Bonne and Marie are in the bookshop, looking for a copy of The Sailor Who Fell from Grace with the Sea. They have just located one and picked it up from the shelf when they see Professor Freud peering in their direction.

Marie: Oh look! Is that Professor Freud?

Belle et Bonne: Yes it is! Hello Professor! I didn't know you were riding in the Tour this year!

Professor Freud: Hello my dears. No, I'm not riding, I'm not allowed to after the stone-throwing incident last year.

Belle et Bonne: Oh dear. Yes, I remember. That wasn't really your fault.

Professor Freud: Yes it was. I should have known better.

Belle et Bonne: You were just testing Galileo's theory.

Professor Freud: I was, but it was the wrong place to be doing it. What's this you're reading?

Marie: It's Yukio Mishima's The Sailor Who Fell From Grace with the Sea.

Professor Freud: An interesting book, by a fascinating case study! Let me know what you think when you've read it.

Belle et Bonne: Yes, we will.

.....

Meanwhile it is cool and wet on the Stage 11 road from Blaye-les-Mines to Lavaur. Cavendish, the Manx Missile is riding next to Farky, who is bemoaning his fate.

Farky: And I was going out on a date with her last night, but I had to cancel.

Mark Cavendish: Why was that?

Farky: Garlic breath.

Mark Cavendish: Aah.

Farky: Garlic's no good for dogs.....

Mark Cavendish: I used to give garlic to my Golden Retriever.

Farky: And now it's dead.

Mark Cavendish: Oops! Sprint's coming up! Bye!

Stage 10: Aurillac to Carmaux

Farky, who had drunk water at the picnic, was riding up near the front of the peloton. The others were feeling a little under the weather, and kept towards the back.

Sweezus: What are Belle et Bonne and Marie doing today?

The VeloDrone: They're looking for a bookshop. They want to buy a copy of The Sailor Who Fell from Grace With the Sea.

Violetta: Sheesh! I wouldn't want to read it. Farky hasn't exactly been talking it up.

Sweezus: Yeah, funny isn't it. He keeps saying 'it gets worse'.

Le Bon David: I gather he means it gets worse for Molly. Poor Molly. She should never have googled the author.

Gustave: Yes, I agree. The story is gruesome enough, but what happened to the author was worse.

Violetta: You mean, when his friend failed to cut off his head? So another friend had to do it. And then the first friend had to do seppuku too.

Gaius: What's so terrible about that? We Romans....

Gustave: Button up Gaius! No, it was worse than that.

Sweezus: Now you sound like Farky.

Gustave: Well it was. Worse for Molly.

Le Bon David: Absolutely. When she read about Yukio Mishima's childhood.....

Sweezus: Yeah.

Just then Farky appeared, dropping back to ride with them.

Farky: Burrrp! Oooh! Pardon! What was in that aligot stuff we ate yesterday?

Violetta: Just Chantal cheese, mashed potato and garlic.

Farky: Yikes! Garlic! Molly hates garlic. I'm done for!

Stage 7: Le Mans to Chateauroux

It was windy and slow on the way from Le Mans to Chateauroux. They passed wheatfields and sunflowers, and rode through grey towns. Farky caught up to Sweezus.

Sweezus: Hey,Farky! You look grim.

Farky: I keep thinking about what Molly told me.

Sweezus: What did she tell you? Tell me.

Farky: She's reading a book called The Sailor Who Fell from Grace wth the Sea. This gang of very smart thirteen year old boys hate dads and their leader talks them into killing the new dad of one of the boys.

Sweezus: That doesn't sound like suitable reading for a dachshund.

Farky: First they ritually kill a kitten.

Sweezus: Shit! Is this book Japanese?

Farky: How did you know?

Sweezus: I think I've read it. It's very disturbing.

Farky: It disturbed Molly. She's up to the final chapter. She knows what's going to happen because of the kitten and she doesn't know whether to read it.

Sweezus: Tell her to read it. It's not quite as bad as she thinks.

Farky: Alright. But poor Molly. It's upsetting her ideas about literature.

Sweezus: How is that bad?

Farky: You're right. How is that bad?

Sweezus: By the way, looks like today's going to be another victory for Mark Cavendish. Does he have a dog?

Farky: He does, but it's dead.