Tuesday, December 22, 2009

The Minus Second Day of Christmas.

Now here's a coincidence for you, said Pliny the Elder, who seemed in a talkative mood.

Go on, I said warily.

Imagine, he said, that you are walking to Norwood to post some letters and do some Christmas shopping. You're just turning in to Webbe Street between the carpark and the Plaza. All at once you hear the strains of Christmas music drifting across from the Parade. There are buildings in the way so you hear only one choral phrase, and that phrase is ' Fall on your knees '.

Oh, I know that one! I said. Oh heeear the angel voiiices, oh niiight divine, ohhhh night, oh night deeevine!

Really, said Pliny. Is that how it goes? Well, I didn't hear any of that, it was cut off. But I was thinking, when I heard it, would it not be an amusing coincidence if one were to fall upon one's knees?

What do you mean, Pliny? In adoration?

Adoration? No. I mean if one were to accidentally trip just at that moment.

Well, I suppose it would if you did. But did you?

No, I merely hypothesised it.

I don't think there can be any such thing as a hypothetical coincidence, Pliny. That means at least one of the things didn't happen. So it can't be a proper coincidence. I do agree it would be funny though. As long as you didn't hurt yourself.

Funny indeed. In fact it is quite a funny song. What comes after 'Oh night deeevine'?

Oh-oh, niiight, when Christ was booorn, I crooned, pleased that I remembered it so well.

What night was that exactly? asked Pliny.

December the 25th of course, I replied.

Ah! said Pliny. The same night that Newton was born! Another coincidence!

Another hypothetical one, I muttered.

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