What If?

Ageless and Mr Lee went downstairs to Mr Lee's laboratory. It was full of shelves and glass cases, dimly lit.

Would you like an iced coffee before we start? asked Mr Lee.

No thanks, said Ageless. I told you I don't like ice.

There's no ice in iced coffee, said Mr Lee. You add it, if you want it. Why don't you like it?

It presages death for lobsters, said Ageless. They keep us on ice before they drop us into boiling water.

Oh bad luck! said Mr Lee, feelingly. Well I'll have one, if you don't mind. And do you mind if I also eat my lunch? It's sushi.

Go ahead, said Ageless, wrinkling up his nose.

Mr Lee went over to the fridge and took out an iced coffee and a small plastic tray of sushi. He opened the coffee and put it on his desk next to the tray.

Now, said Mr Lee, I'll show you my giant trilobite.

He leaned across Ageless to lift his giant trilobite down from an upper shelf.

Oops! said Mr Lee, dropping the giant trilobite onto his lunch.

Sheeezz! said Ageless. This is getting too much like Kobo's counterfactual for my liking.

What are you talking about? asked Mr Lee crossly. Look at my lunch, it's ruined!

What if your giant trilobite had rolled off the table and cracked me on the head? What if my brains oozed out? said Ageless. That could easily have happened.

No it couldn't, said Mr Lee.

Why not? said Ageless. Don't tell me you are of the opinion that a counterfactual can't happen?

It's not that, said Mr Lee, I don't quite know if I should say this, but I'm sure you know.....

What? said Ageless, moving slightly to avoid the dripping coffee and falling lumps of fishy-smelling rice.

A lobster. said Mr Lee, has a primitive nervous system and doesn't have the sort of brain that can ooze out.