How to Beat Crabs

Surfing-With-Whales! said The VeloDrone. What kind of a name is that?

He's going to start up a business, said Sweezus. Surfing with whales at Middleton.

Ridiculous! scoffed The VeloDrone. Everyone knows whales don't surf.

They sometimes come in on the tide, said Sweezus.

When they're dead, said the VeloDrone. Or beaching. That's a bad kind of business.

Don't be so sure, said Le Bon David. People love to save whales.

It's nothing to do with saving whales, said Sweezus. This is how it works. You pay to go surfing with Surfing-With-Whales. He takes you way out to where the whales are. Then you surf in.

Without the whales? said Marie. That's misleading.

No, it isn't, said Sweezus. I'll call him and get him to come in and meet you. You'll see he's a really nice guy.

He called Surfing-With-Whales, who was not far away. Ten minutes later there was a rap on the door.

Hi all! said Surfing-With-Whales.

You must be Surfing-With-Whales! said Belle et Bonne.

Not at the moment, said Surfing-with-Whales. I'm in town on my bike.

Oh well said! laughed Le Bon David. Very funny! Do come in! I'm David, this is Vello, Marie, and Belle et Bonne. And Sweezus you already know.

Yeah, said Surfing-With-Whales. He told me you need a fourth rider. I'm your man.

Wait, said The Velodrone. We have two requirements. One is that you can ride a bike. The other is that you must be a philosopher. What do you say?

Dude! said Surfing-With-Whales. Did you ever meet a surfer that wasn't?

Yes, said The VeloDrone. I'm afraid you'll have to do better than that.

Papa, whispered Belle et Bonne. Don't be so picky. Surfing-With-Whales could be our secret weapon. At the very least he'll know how to beat crabs.