The Flying Happens

Guess what? says Terence.

You're going to Barbados, says Baby Pierre. And Nose is going.

I know, says Terence.

I don't, says Nose. Where is Barbados?

In the ocean, says Baby Pierre. Ageless and Kobo are there already.

I can't swim, says Nose.

Me either, says Terence. We'll be flying.

I can't fly, says Nose.

You're an idiot, says Terence. You just have to sit down. The flying happens.

I can't go anyway, says Nose. I'm endangered. I have to stay here. What if there aren't any blackberries?

There will be, says Terence.

In the ocean, says Nose. I don't think so.

It's an island, says Baby Pierre.

My parrot came from an island, says Terence.

I thought you'd forgotten your parrot, says Baby Pierre.

I have, says Terence. But I still have the memory.

That doesn't make sense, says Baby Pierre.

Do you like parrots? asks Nose.

I LOVE parrots, says Terence. If you were a parrot, I would love you. And you could be my blood brother.

Sister, says Nose.

Gaius comes into the kitchen.

We have a problem.

What is it? asks Baby Pierre.

The bandicoot, says Gaius. It's protected. It may not be able to leave the country.

It isn't a bandicoot, says Terence. It might be a parrot.

Nonsense, says Gaius. Anyone can see it's a bandicoot.

I want to come, says Nose. I want to be Terence's sister.

Blood sister, says Terence. You have to give me a claw.

And what does she get? asks Baby Pierre.

Later, says Terence. Something always falls off me.

This is ridiculous, says Gaius. I've called Arthur, but he's not answering his phone.

Griff has followed Gaius into the kitchen.

Shouldn't we be leaving?

Yes, says Gaius. As soon as we've dealt with the problem.

No time, says Griff. We must get to the airport.

Gaius thinks quickly.

......

At the airport.

Time for boarding.

Griff walks up the steps with his carry on luggage. Gaius follows, with Terence, and a basket.

The flight attendant bends down charmingly to Terence.

Hello there, little fellow, what have we got in the basket?

A parrot, says Terence.

How cute, smiles the flight attendant. Will he be staying in the basket?

It's a girl parrot, says Terence.

What a long nose she has for a parrot, says the flight attendant. You're a lucky little boy. She looks almost real. May I pat her?

No, says Terence. She's growing new feathers.

The flight attendant looks at Gaius.

What a lovely imagination your little boy has!

Hm, says Gaius. We seem to be holding people up here.

Of course sir, seats 18A and B, on the right.

They join Griff, who is already seated, his seat belt done up.

Terence has to sit in the middle.

Put the basket under the seat in front of you, says Gaius.

I can't, says Terence.

I'll do it, says Griff.

He snatches the basket from Terence.

He peers in at Nose, who isn't a parrot.

He has a bad feeling. The Lord is not happy with this type of deception.

He kicks the basket under the seat in front of the unholy infant.

He closes his eyes, and prays for guidance.

Guidance which is forthcoming.