Big Lobster Trousers

Gaius and Denis have gone home.

Denis is sitting in a comfortable chair with his foot up.

He is talking to Ageless.

I may be all right by tomorrow, says Denis. But you need to be ready in case.

Ever ready, that's me, says Ageless. Shall I practise falling off the table?

Yes, says Denis. That's the part I'm most reluctant to do.

Cup of tea, Denis? asks Gaius, looking into the room.

Yes thanks, says Denis. And a couple of pillows.

Pillows? says Gaius. 

Ageless is going to practise falling off the table, says Denis.

Ah, yes, says Gaius. We don't want him cracking his carapace.

I know how to fall without breaking my carapace, says Ageless.

You may think so, says Gaius. But these tiles are quite hard.

He goes into his bedroom and comes back with two pillows.

Ageless is now on the table.

Denis has turned his chair round to watch.

Baby Pierre is also watching, from the window sill.

Gaius arranges the pillows on the floor below Ageless.

Ageless curls up slowly and drops.

Floop.

Well done, says Gaius.

What was supposed to happening? asks Baby Pierre.

A violent storm, during which the deck splits in two, says Gaius. Candide, Pangloss and the sailor are washed overboard.

I didn't get that, says Baby Pierre. It was more like he decided to roll into the water.

My first try, says Ageless. This time, rock the table.

All right says Gaius. Although it's not easy to rock this table. But it does come apart in the middle.

What for? asks Denis.

An extension, says Gaius. In case I have multiple guests.

Ageless has climbed back onto the table.

Ready, says Ageless, expecting the table to start rocking. 

Instead the table opens up underneath him.

He lands on the folded extension, amongst fallen crumbs.

Sorry, says Gaius. I forgot that you couldn't fall right through it.

No harm done, says Ageless.

He moves away from the folded extension. 

Gaius closes the gap in the middle.

Rock the table, says Baby Pierre. 

Gaius tries, but the effect is unconvincing.

Henriette comes in from the bathroom, with wet hair.

Care to lend a hand? asks Gaius. I'm rocking the table so that Ageless can practise falling off it.

Sure, says Henriette. She starts rocking the table.

Denis watches her fondly.

She may have small hands, but she's strong.

Ageless falls off the table, realistically. 

Better, says Baby Pierre. Now do it without the pillow.

He'll need some kind of padding, says Henriette. 

Big lobster trousers, suggests Baby Pierre.

Ageless jumps at the idea of big lobster trousers.