Doctor Brown Behaves

Le Bon David was feeling a little uncomfortable. He was sitting in the front row, and Doctor Brown was beginning to misbehave.

He had already forced David to take a bite of his banana, and lick an indeterminate substance from a very large spoon.

Now he seemed to be inviting him to get up and dance. David knew that at perfomances such as these it was better to play along. He stood up graciously and allowed himself to be waltzed on the spot in front of his seat. But when Doctor Brown tried to gve him a big smoochy kiss, David drew the line, and sat down. Wait till I tell Vello about this, he thought. He won't believe it.

Now Doctor Brown had produced a Princess magazine. He read out a line, then asked the audience a simple question. No one was willing to chance a reply. David, finding the wait intolerable, called out the answer. Doctor Brown threw a green olive at him. I must not answer any more questions, thought David, no matter how much I feel impelled.

Doctor Brown, having thrown dripping handfuls of green olives at various members of the audience and driven three of them out of the room, decided to do some puppetry. Oh good, thought David, I do like puppetry. And he craned forward in his seat. But Doctor Brown's puppets were invisible. No matter how intricately he appeared to be manipulating them, David could see nothing but Doctor Brown's patterned trousers in the space where he was directed to look.

For an empiricist, it was thoroughly confusing.

NanoString Bicycle

People! Remember me? It is I, Salvador Dali. The only difference between myself and a madman is: I am not mad. Ah yes, you remember me now!

It was I who painted the fourth dimension, in the shape of eight cubes. It was I who depicted the bending of light in the form of a spoon. Science, my friends, follows Dali, and Dali follows no one at all.

Surrealism may be dead. But Dali is not dead. Dali moves with the times. Dali moves before the times. The times follow Dali.

Enter my space. It is dark. What have we here? In a dark interactive tunnel you find a brilliant piece of work, by Dali. It is his new NanoString bicycle. The bicycle is blue and green and violet. These colours symbolise.....NOTHING!!! they are merely the colours Dali has chosen today. Symbolism is dead, but things must have a colour.

The NanoString bicycle is made of nano particles. They are miniscule. They are absorbed immediately into your skin. The bicycle becomes a part of you and you become the bicycle. You pedal down the dark tunnel, towards a screen at the end. You see your self riding towards you, and you are ALARMED! Momentarily. But you have forgotten your new nano qualities. You ride straight through the screen.

Crash! A million stars! Receding, receding....... You ride through dark matter, and dark energy sucks hungrily at your pedals....... you are going to vanish inside a BLACK HOLE. PANIC!!! But no. Here is the beauty and inventiveness of Dali's bicycle. The bicycle has remained attached to the tunnel by a series of nano strings, blue and green and violet. Yes! They did symbolise something afer all. They draw you back from certain extinction.The beautiful strings.

I, Dali, invented this.