Running From The Alien

They drive on, towards Grafton.

It's raining heavily, but the camper windows are open.

The wipers are swishing. Frop-frip-frop.

A feathery mass lands on the front windscreen.

Sweezus stops.

It's Roo-kai.

Thanks, says Roo-kai, coming in through the passenger window. It's too wet for flying.

Sure is, says Sweezus. 

You didn't wait for me, says Roo-kai.

Sorry, says Sweezus. 

I stayed behind to have a few words with Ninja, says Roo-kai.

He's half mine now, says Terence. Did you tell him?

How could I tell him? says Roo-kai. 

You are half Terence's, says Terence. That's how.

At the time I didn't know that, says Roo-kai. I simply warned him not to expect to see too much of Arthur.

And did he answer? asks Arthur.

He answered with a sound that could be interpreted in several ways, says Roo-kai.

Prrrrt! says Terence.

Something like that, says Roo-kai. Why are the windows open?

Mexican beans, says Sweezus. Squeeze through to the back and get dry.

We saw the Big Banana, says Terence. I took a photo.

I saw it too, says Roo-kai. 

I've been inside it, says Terence.

Not today? says Roo-kai.

A long time ago, says Terence. At night, with the Magpie.

First I've heard of the Magpie, says Sweezus. 

It could make train noises, says Terence. It could even do crashes.

Yeah, magpies can do that, says Sweezus.

We saw an alien, says Terence. A red alien glowing inside the banana.

No wonder Farky wouldn't go in, says Sweezus.

I bet it was a drinks fridge, says Arthur. 

Yeah, probably, says Sweezus.

Terence remembers that, yes, it was a drinks fridge. And the red glowing alien was a sports drink.

But it had been scary.

And Farky had run away. 

Friends Are For

It's raining when they arrive in Coffs Harbour. 

Sweezus stops at the Big Banana.

Take a good look, says Sweezus. We're not getting out.

But I want to, says Terence.

Too bad, says Sweezus. Here, take a photo.

He hands Terence his phone.

Set it up first, says Terence. 

Terence hands the phone back.

Ring! The phone rings, at that moment. 

It's Gaius.

Where are you? asks Gaius. 

Big Banana, says Sweezus.

We're in Grafton, says Gaius. It's raining.

Same here, says Sweezus. We've just stopped for some snacks.

Well, hurry up, says Gaius. Ludwig and I and the frogs are waiting here in the Mazda.

No worries, says Sweezus. See you shortly.

Photo! says Terence.

Sweezus sets up the phone so that Terence only has to press one white button.

Click.

Good, says Sweezus. Now you've got that to remind you.

Terence looks at his photo of the Big Banana.

It is just of one end. 

He shows it to Arthur.

Interesting angle, says Arthur.

Okay, says Sweezus. We're done here. Let's look for a café.

They drift slowly through Coffs in the camper looking for a café.

The Happy Frog!  All Day Breakfast! says Arthur.

Sweezus pulls up. They enter and order.

Two serves of Mexican Beans on sourdough toast with cheese and sour cream.

Three drinks.

A Metabolizer for Arthur, a Whole Earth for Sweezus and a Veg Out for Terence (featuring beetroot). 

This has got pumpkin seeds in it, says Sweezus.

This has got spinach, says Arthur.

Wanna swap? asks Sweezus.

They swap. That's what friends are for.

Like yeah, when you don't read the full list of ingredients in your special blend smoothie.

Terence likes his, though. Carrot and beetroot and ginger. It's red.

Can I see my photo again? asks Terence.

Sweezus brings the photo up on his phone.

Did you go into the Big Banana with Unni? asks Sweezus.

No, says Terence. I went in. But not with Unni. 

Just with Farky, says Sweezus. 

No he waited outside, says Terence. It was night time. He was too scared to come in.

Too scared? That wasn't like the old Farky.

Sweezus looks pensive.

Arthur thinks maybe Sweezus should get a new dog.

Tree Rhymes

 Is banala a word? asks Terence.

Not that I know of, says Sweezus.

Trying to think of a rhyme for koala? asks Arthur.

No, says Terence. 

A poem doesn't have to rhyme, says Arthur.

Yeah that's true, says Sweezus. Remember that poem you wrote about the fig tree?

That's not a good example, says Arthur.

Say it, says Terence. 

I passed a fig tree / and perceived the whole tree/ I am like the fig tree..... says Arthur.

They're the best rhymes ever, says Terence.

Except they're not rhymes, says Sweezus.

I don't care, says Terence. Now I've got an example.

He thinks a bit more.

Then...

Got it! says Terence.

I passed a koala, a whole koala, I'm like the koala.....

You're just copying Arthur, says Sweezus.

It's not finished, says Terence.

He continues.

Except he's at the zoo, the koala/ and I'm at the Big Banala.

Not yet, says Arthur.

You going to let him get away with banala? says Sweezus.

Depends how he ends it, says Arthur.

I have ended it, says Terence. At the Big Banala.

Do you want to hear the rest of mine? asks Arthur. 

More tree rhymes? says Terence. No thanks.

I am the same as the leaves/ and the cells of which leaves are fabricated/ but this is only true if...

Leaves are like fingers! says Sweezus.

You remembered, says Arthur.

I never really got it, says Sweezus. 

I'm not like the fig tree, says Arthur. That was my point.

My poem is better, says Terence. Because, want to know why?

Yeah, says Sweezus. 

Claws, says Terence.

I don't remember any claws in it, says Sweezus.

That's my point, says Terence.

Sweezus and Arthur confer briefly.

Then.....

It's good, says Arthur. You get a half share in the baby koala. Congratulations.

Yay! says Terence. 

He is proud of his poem.

Proud of what's in it, and prouder of what he left out.

Impala Or Gala or Mahler

The rain is easing.

Are we there yet? asks Terence.

Not yet, says Sweezus. But we'll stop off in Coffs Harbour to buy snacks.

I've been there before! says Terence. Can we see the Big Banana?

We'll be driving past it, says Sweezus.

When were you there? asks Arthur.

A long time ago, says Terence. I was with Unni.

Oh, Unni.

And Farky, says Terence. When his teeth all got broken.

Yeah, says Sweezus. The omniscient teeth. I remember.

They knew everything, says Terence.

It did seem that way, says Sweezus.

Arthur decides to change the subject.

Have you popped all the bubble wrap? asks Arthur.

Yes, says Terence. 

Want to look at Ninja's adoption papers? asks Arthur.

Okay, says Terence.

There's a photo and a paw print, says Arthur.

Terence looks at the photo of Ninja, and the paw print.

All that for a stupid poem, says Terence. You were lucky.

I'm always lucky, says Arthur.

Can I share him? asks Terence.

If you come up with a poem, says Arthur. 

Easy, says Terence.

It's not that easy, says Sweezus. It should be a good one.

It will be, says Terence. Wait while I think of a rhyme.

Silence in the camper.

The wipers are no longer needed.

Arthur picks at the edges of his bandaids.

Sweezus thinks about Farky.

He was really fond of that dog.

Terence tries to think of a rhyme for koala.

He doesn't know impala, or gala, or Mahler.

(Not that these rhymes would be useful).

Does He Do Ninja Moves?

Arthur comes out of the breeding centre with the paperwork.

He has officially adopted Ninja, the baby koala.

Okay, let's go, says Sweezus.

Where's Ninja? asks Terence.

Ninja stays here, says Arthur. But we can visit him any time the zoo's open.

It's open now, says Terence.

Yeah, but we're going, says Sweezus. 

Veronica sticks her head out.

You're not leaving without seeing Ninja?

I guess not, says Sweezus. Where is he?

Veronica points to a cage of koalas, who are either sleeping or chewing.

That one's Ninja.

Does he do Ninja moves? asks Terence.

Sometimes, says Veronica.

Terence tries a Ninja move. A back flip and twist. 

Without the actual flip. 

Or much of a twist.

Ninja stops chewing, scratches his bottom, and resumes chewing.

That's not a Ninja move, says Terence.

Even Ninjas sometimes scratch their bottoms, says Veronica.

I don't, says Terence. 

This is Arthur Rimbaud, Ninja, says Veronica. He's adopted you in exchange for an original poem

A bargain, says Arthur. 

I'm sure Ninja thinks so, says Veronica.

Okay, we're off now, says Sweezus. 

That was good adopting, says Terence. Goodbye Ninja. You need to practise.

Ninja spits out a gum nut. 

Sweezus, Arthur and Terence leave the Billabong Zoo and head for the camper.

Roo-kai lingers.

He facilitated this adoption. He feels he should speak.

I'm afraid you won't see much of Arthur, says Roo-kai. But, have a good life.

Prrfft! says Ninja.

Roo-kai takes that to mean Thanks.

Green Arses Out

That your kid? asks Veronica.

Our statue, says Arthur.

A mobile statue? says Veronica.

Yes, says Arthur. This one's different. Most statues move imperceptibly.

Like koalas, says Veronica. They sleep almost all day. How's the poem going?

I'm working on it, says Arthur. It starts like this: Disinfectant reminds us of leaves.

Hey, that's good, says Veronica. It does smell of eucalyptus, come to think if it.

Our eyes roll back inside our heads with the fumes/ Our green arses...

Not allowed says Veronica. 

My poem, says Arthur. Their green arses.

This isn't working, says Veronica. No arses. Try describing their dear little faces.

Our spoon shaped noses swoon in the blue delirium, says Arthur.

They're not dolphins, says Veronica. That's it. You're not going to adopt one.

Okay, says Arthur. Suit yourself. But feel free to use spoon-shaped.

Veronica nods curtly. 

He joins Sweezus and Terence outside the koala breeding centre.

What happened? asks Sweezus.

I blew it, says Arthur. Looks like I don't get to adopt one.

I want to adopt one, says Terence. What's adopt?

Be like a parent, says Sweezus. Pay for its stuff.

I don't want to, says Terence. When are we going?

Now, says Sweezus. Come on. Where's Roo-kai?

Roo-kai comes out of the breeding centre. 

Good news, says Roo-kai. Arthur's adopting a baby koala called Ninja.

How'd that happen? asks Sweezus.

I told Veronica he was Arthur Rimbaud, says Roo-kai. It made all the difference.

The poem wasn't finished, says Arthur.

She doesn't want you to finish it, and she said she'll keep the green arses, says Roo-kai.

Ha ha, laughs Terence. 

You'll get a photo and bio, a certificate of adoption, a paw print and a quarterly news letter, says Roo-kai. 

When? asks Arthur.

Now, says Roo-kai. Go back in and meet Ninja.

This is embarrassing. Arthur goes back inside

You'd Think Differently

We should be getting back to the entrance, says Roo-kai.

Not yet! says Terence. 

They'll be waiting, says Roo-kai.

I haven't seen all the animals, says Terence.

It's too wet, says Roo-kai. They'll be sheltering.

This is a bad day, says Terence. 

Yes, says Roo-kai. Say goodbye to the monkey.

Bye, says Terence. 

Plooey, says the monkey. Pop! Ha ha!

They head for the entrance, which is close to the  koala breeding centre, which Sweezus and Arthur have gone into.

This isn't a hospital, says Veronica. It's a breeding centre.

No worries, says Sweezus. 

But here's a couple of bandaids, says Veronica. And two for your friend.

Thanks, says Sweezus. 

Disinfectant? asks Veronica.

Not for me, says Arthur.

You might be sorry, says Veronica.

I'm never sorry, says Arthur.

That's a weird thing to say, says Veronica, handing bottle of disinfectant-for-koalas to Sweezus.

He's a poet, says Sweezus. 

Not many of them about these days, says Veronica.

Because we don't use disinfectant, says Arthur.

Very funny, says Veronica. I imagine you'd think differently if you were a koala.

Yeah, he would, says Sweezus. 

Would either of you like to hold a baby koala? asks Veronica.

Nah, says Sweezus. We're not visitors. We're here to pick up a kid we left here.

A statue of a kid, says Arthur.

Yeah, statue of a kid, says Sweezus. We'd better be going.

Wait, says Veronica. This breeding program costs money. Would you like to adopt a koala?

No, but thanks for asking, says Sweezus.

I'll adopt one, says Arthur. Which one can I have?

You don't get to HAVE one, says Veronica. You just give us money.

Okay, says Arthur. I don't have money, but I'll give you a poem.

That won't help the koalas, says Veronica.

Publicity, says Sweezus.

Have to be a bloody good poem, says Veronica.

It would be, says Arthur. 

Sweezus is already at the door. 

From there he sees Terence, who is running towards the koala breeding centre.

Because he's seen Sweezus.

Guess what? cries Terence. The black handed spider monkey can't pop bubble wrap. Guess why?

Vestigial thumbs, says Sweezus. 

Terence is disappointed that Sweezus knows this already.