'...rot'

What will I do in the mean time? asks Baby Pierre.

Whatever you like, says Martin-Pierre Foache.

I'd like to do something useful, says Baby Pierre.

Ever thought of being a relief doorman? asks Martin-Pierre Foache.

No, says Baby Pierre. But I'm open to anything.

He is, says Ouvert.

You'll need training, says Martin-Pierre Foache. But the work is not difficult.

Cool, says Baby Pierre. Do I get to hand out maps and lists of the things in the rooms?

Yes, says Martin-Pierre Foache. And you must remember to tell all visitors that some of the items have been relocated.

Wouldn't it be easier to make a new list? asks Ouvert.

Tch, says Martin-Pierre Foache. No it wouldn't. Items are moved every day.

Who does it? asks Baby Pierre.

We don't know, says Martin-Pierre Foache.

You need a guard, says Ouvert. I'm good at guarding.

I'll need proof of that, says Martin-Pierre Foache.

Let me in, says Ouvert.

In you go, says Martin-Pierre Foache. If you spot anyone moving anything, don't approach them, just come and tell me.

Okay, says Ouvert. 

He enters the Shipowner's House, and looks for a visitor to follow.

This is great! says Baby Pierre I'll be the doorman and he'll be the guard.

Hold your horses, says Martin-Pierre Foache. I'm the doorman.

Belle comes back out.

What a darling house! says Belle. I loved the blue dining room wall with the goddess friezes.

They are always popular, says Martin-Pierre Foache. And the beauty of friezes is that they can't be relocated.

Gosh, yes! says Belle. Nothing else was where it should be!

Nothing? says Martin-Pierre Foache. Luckily, I have now employed an experienced guard.

It's Ouvert, says Baby Pierre. And I'm the relief doorman.

Really? says Belle. Does that mean you're staying in Le Havre?

You know me, says Baby Pierre. I never stay anywhere. But I'm here till next year. 

I've got him booked on the Oasis of the Seas, says Martin-Pierre Foache. Back to Australia, via the Caribbean.

How wonderful! says Belle. Well, Baby Pierre, that's you sorted. Now where's that half carrot?

Here, says Martin-Pierre Foache. It's seen better days.

It used to say 'carrot', says Belle. It never says anything now.

She picks up the half carrot. 

'...rot', says the carrot.

Constellations and So On

Belle arrives at the Shipowner's House, with Baby Pierre and Ouvert.

Martin-Pierre Foache is standing outside.

There you are, says Martin-Pierre Foache. I was beginning to think you weren't coming.

But here we are, says Belle. This is Baby Pierre, and this is Ouvert, who isn't his cousin.

Not his cousin? says Matin-Pierre Foache. 

In case you thought he was, says Belle. He isn't. 

I took the name of his cousin, says Ouvert.

That clears that up, says Martin-Pierre Foache. Now, I believe Baby Pierre wanted to see me.

Yes, says Baby Pierre. Belle says you know Ageless lobster.

Indeed I do, says Martin-Pierre Foache. We sea-faring lobsters all know one another.

But Ageless is no seafarer, says Baby Pierre. He spends his time in the library.

And what is he reading? asks Martin-Pierre Foache.

Stuff, says Baby Pierre. About constellations and so on.

Constellations and so on, says Martin-Pierre Foache. There you are then. How may I help you?

Can we have a tour of the house? asks Belle.

Certainly, says Martin-Pierre Foache. But I'd prefer you to leave your half carrot outside. We don't encourage eating.

Okay, says Belle. She pays the seven euros. Martin-Pierre Foache gives her a map and list of contents.

Dont rely on it too heavily, says Martin-Pierre Foache.

Okay, says Belle.

She detaches the half carrot, and gives it to Martin-Pierre Foache for safe keeping.

She enters the Shipowner's House. It's a five story house built around a central light well, with rooms containing furniture, old maps, paintings, and various knicknacks dating back to the Ancien Régime, smelling faintly of fish.

Baby Pierre and Ouvert remain outside

Not going in? asks Martin-Pierre Foache.

No, says Baby Pierre. I want to ask you something.

Go ahead, says Martin-Pierre Foache.

If you were Ageless, what advice would you give me? says Baby Pierre.

In regards to what? asks Martin-Pierre Foache.  

Baby Pierre hesitates.

He crashed his bicycle in the Tour de France, says Ouvert. He wants to go home to Australia, but he has no means to get there.

No problem, says Martin-Pierre Foache. I'll get him on one of those cruise ships. They're always coming and going. We'll find one that's going to Australia.

He consults his smart phone.

Yes! The Oasis of the Seas will start offering cruises to Australia early next year. I'll book you a spot on the first one!

Next year? says Baby Pierre. 

Yes, No And Water

The frogs have come back, after catching some flies.

Who are those guys? asks Quiet-tartus.

Yurp! says the knowlesi.

Méen and Maclou, says Terence. And guess what? 

Whurp? asks the knowlesi.

What? asks Quiet-tartus (who has not swallowed so many French flies).

They're going to make it so the carrot can talk, says Terence.

It can already talk, says Quiet-tartus.

More than just 'carrot', says Terence.

Saint Méen sits up.

Are these the frogs? asks Saint Méen. 

What do YOU think? asks Quiet-tartus.

Ha ha, laughs Saint Méen. I deserved that.

He pokes Saint Maclou.

Terence's frogs have returned, says Saint Méen.

Do they require the gift of speech? asks Saint Maclou.

NO! says Terence. They've already got it.

Grurp! says the knowlesi. 

That frog could be helped to do better, says Saint Maclou.

He's just burping, says Terence.

What's that b-urp-uzzing? asks the knowlesi.

Nothing, says Saint Méen. 

Surely it's all right for these small frogs to know our secret, says Saint Maclou.

You're right, Maclou, says Saint Méen. The buzzing comes from our haloes. We keep them hidden under our beanies, which saves us from the constant demands of the public

Haloes, says Terence. You know what those are?

Nurp! says the knowlesi.

They're magical hat rings, says Terence. I used to have one, but I dropped it and it broke and the Virgin said no one gets a second one.

That is certainly true, says Saint Méen. Ours are intact. The beanies help keep them so.

You should've had a beanie, says Quiet-tartus.

I had one, says Terence. 

I bet you lost it, says Quiet-tartus.

How did you know? asks Terence.

Because you don't have it, says Quiet-tartus.

What if it was in my pocket? says Terence.

You've got nothing but o-rings in there, says the knowlesi.

They are highly articulate frogs, says Saint Maclou. We should concentrate on the carrot.

Yes, says Terence. These are the words you should teach it: yes and no. 

If we give it the gift of speech it can say what it likes, says Saint Méen.

Ha ha, laughs the knowlesi. We know it likes water.

Okay, yes, no and water, says Terence.

WHATEVER it likes! says Saint Méen. For instance, it might say: How has my life come to this?

How indeed, agrees Saint Maclou. 

Gift Of Terrible Curses

Saint Méen and Saint Maclou! says Belle. How lovely to see you!

Hush, says Saint Méen, pointing to his beanie. We're travelling incognito.

Sorry, says Belle. But thank you for giving the pebbles a lift.

Not at all, says Saint Méen. Happy to be of service. We were cycling back from Rouen, when Roo-kai appeared out of nowhere.

Hardly nowhere, says Roo-kai.

The heavens, then, says Saint Méen.

Everything happens for a reason, says Saint Maclou.

Or seems to have, says Belle. 

There's an interesting thought! says Saint Méen. 

And he asked us to give a lift to the pebbles, says Saint Maclou. 

So here we are, says Baby Pierre. Have you been to the Shipowners' House?

Yes, says Belle. We met the doorman.

He was a lobster, says Terence. He wanted to give us a tour.

A self-guided tour, says Belle. And he knew Ageless.

Great, says Baby Pierre. Let's go there right now.

Wait for the frogs to come back, says Belle. They're off catching flies.

We'll wait here for your frogs, says Saint Maclou. We could do with a breather.

Thank you, says Belle. We'll be back in less than an hour. Coming Terence?

Can I stay here? asks Terence.

If that's okay, says Belle.

Of course it is, says Saint Méen. We have a soft spot for Terence. Remember that beetle?

The Scarabee! says Terence. It's legs fell off. 

Not all of them, says Saint Maclou.

See you later, then, says Belle, picking up Baby Pierre and Ouvert.

I say, says Saint Maclou. Does she know what's attached to her backpack?

My old shorts, says Terence. I've got new ones.

Very nice, says Saint Maclou. Birds of prey, aren't they? But I was referring to the half carrot.

Yes, says Terence. That's our carrot. It can only say 'carrot'.

I'm not surprised, says Saint Méen.

Would it benefit from the  gift of speech? asks Saint Maclou. It's within our power.

I know, says Terence. You gave it to the beetle.

Hmm, that didn't go well, says Saint Méen.

Those terrible curses! says Saint Maclou

But the carrot is friendly, says Terence.  

We'll think about it, says Saint Méen. When Belle brings it back.

The saints lie back on the grass, looking up at clouds that remind them of feathers.

Their beanies ease up their foreheads. 

The buzzing gets louder.

Terence can see the front edge of their haloes, flashing.

He is going to say something, but but forgets to. The frogs have come back,

French Flies

Now what? says Terence.

We'll look around the dock area, says Belle. 

They pass the Bains des Docks, an aquatic centre.

Can we go swimming? asks Terence.

I don't think so, says Belle. 

My frogs want to go swimming, says Terence.

What? says Quiet-tartus. Swimming? No, we want to eat flies.

Here's a nice grassy area, says Belle. I'll let you out here.

Swimming would be better, says Terence.

But the frogs don't think so. They hop away to catch flies.

Belle sits on the grass and takes her phone out. 

A missed call from Gaius. What can he want?

She calls Gaius.

Hoo-cgh!-uch!-hrm! says Gaius. Who is it?

Me, Belle,  says Belle. Sorry did I wake you?

Not at all, says Gaius. Just coughing. Winter ills. Aha! I wanted to speak to you.

Well, go ahead, says Belle.

Where are you? asks Gaius.

In Le Havre, says Belle. I was following Baby Pierre here. But I arrived first. So I'm waiting, in a grassy area.

Is Terence with you? asks Gaius.

Yes, says Belle. Do you want to speak to him?

Later, says Gaius. What about the frogs?

They're here, says Belle. Hopping about catching flies.

French flies? says Gaius.

Is that supposed to be funny? asks Belle.

No.. oh yes, ha ha, I suppose it is funny, says Gaius. French flies! But seriously, those frogs must return to Australia. How would you describe their condition?

Fine, says Belle. They made a friend, a green spotted frog who called herself Parsley.

A pelodytes punctatus! says Gaius. 

That's her, says Belle.

Don't let them get too friendly, says Gaius. 

They didn't, says Belle. And now she's gone home.

Very good, says Gaius. So, when can we expect you?

Don't know, says Belle. We're waiting for Baby Pierre.

Here he comes! cries Terence. 

And its true. Here he comes, having leapt from the panier velo of an ancient chap in a buzzing red beanie.

Behind whom is another ancient chap in a similar beanie, from whose panier velo leaps Ouvert.

Above them Roo-kai flutters, looking pleased with his efforts.

Now A Doorman

Belle asked me to set up a rendez-vous in Le Havre, says Roo-kai.

Okay, says Baby Pierre. Where?

The Shipowner's House, says Roo-kai. Do you know where that is?

I'll ask when I get to Le Havre, says Baby Pierre.

Fine, says Roo-kai. Belle said she thought you'd go there.

She was right. How did she know? asks Baby Pierre.

Better ask her, says Roo-kai.

He flies back up the road to where Belle has emerged from the Boucles de la Seine and entered the port of Le Havre.

Big boats! says Terence. 

Yes, says Belle. What are they all?

Tugboats, supply ships, cargo ships, container ships, oil tankers, crane ships, bulk carriers, and passenger cruise ships.

To name just a few.

I told Baby Pierre we'd meet them at the Shipowner's House, says Roo-kai. 

Great, says Belle. We'll check out where it is, and then we'll explore the dock area.

She takes out her phone, and gets directions to 3 quai de I'lle.

It's a five storey house, now a museum. A lobster is waiting outside.

Bonjour, madame, says the lobster, as Belle leans her bicycle against the wall.

Bonjour, says Belle. 

Are you taking the tour? says the lobster. It's self-guided. Here is a list of the objects you can see in the various rooms. But I should warn you, some of them have been re-located.

That will not bother us, says Belle.

It will bother me, says Terence. 

It won't, says Belle. 

Seven euros for you madame, says the lobster, and free for the child.

We're not going in yet, says Belle. We're just here to set up a rendez-vous. 

That's all right, says the lobster. When will your friends be arriving?

Later on, says Belle. I don't know exactly. But Roo-kai will keep us posted. The thing is, one of our friends has a special purpose for coming to Le Havre, and you might be involved.

I, madame? says the lobster.

Do you know Ageless lobster? asks Belle.

Ageless lobster! says the lobster, Of course I know Ageless! Is it he?

No, says Belle. He's still in Adelaide, as far as I know. Our friend is Baby Pierre. Ageless is his mentor.

Then he is welcome! cries the lobster. I am Martin-Pierre Foache by the way. I owned this fine house once, but now alas, I must serve as a doorman. Still, it's a living.

Wonderful, says Belle. Okay, we'll be back later.

I await your return, says Martin-Pierre Foache, and the arrival of Ageless's baby.

Ha ha, laughs Terence. He's not a baby!

He's actually a pebble, says Belle. Quite an old one. With a mark on his head like a claw.

Or a tulip, says Terence.

Apologies, says Martin-Pierre Foache. And merci for the heads-up.

Belle turns to go.

Martin-Pierre Foache sees the droopy half-carrot, attached to a small pair of shorts, hanging from her back pack.

He wonders if she knows it is there.

Teeth Of The Future

Roo-kai descends, flying level with Belle's ear.

What happened to the carrot? asks Roo-kai

The frogs, says Belle. I'm hoping to dry it out as I go.

They ate the bottom half? asks Roo-kai.

No! says Belle. Is it missing?

Yes, says Roo-kai. And the top half looks like it's waiting for something.

Grandpa, says Terence. 

We were praying, says the knowlesi.

I wasn't, says Terence.

You were , says Quiet-tartus.

I definitely was, says the knowlesi. I'm still doing it. Ommmmm.

Where did you learn that? asks Roo-kai.

Baby Pierre, says the knowlesi. And he learned it from his mother. And she learned it from the Omniscient Stone.

It's just a stupid rock, says Terence. With knobs on.

It's supposed to know the future, says the knowlesi.

So what's the point praying to it? says Roo-kai.

 A good question, says Belle. By the way, did you see Baby Pierre and Ouvert on the road anywhere?

Yes, says Roo-kai. They're already two k's behind us.

Oh well, says Belle. It was their choice. It means we'll have time to look around Le Havre.

What's there? asks Terence.

Boats, says Belle. All kinds. And the Bains des Docks, and the Docks Océane arena, and the Magic Mirrors. 

Magic Mirrors! says Terence. Let's go there!

Okay, says Belle. We'll see all of them, but first we'll go to the Shipowners's House. That's where I think Baby Pierre will be heading.

Shall I go back and check? asks Roo-kai. We could set up a rendez-vous.

Yes, do that, says Belle.

Roo-kai flies back to where Baby Pierre and Ouvert are toiling along the road, sweating.

You guys, says Roo-kai. 

What? says Baby Pierre. Come to mock us?

No way, says Roo-kai. I'm here to help. And to tell you what's happened to the carrot.

Tell us, says Ouvert. 

It's now only half a carrot, says Roo-kai. Hanging on the back of Belle's pack, with Terence's old shorts. Looking for some kind of grandpa. The knowlesi is giving it an ommm.

Ommmms don't work, says Baby Pierre. The Omniscient Stone used to say it all the time.

So how do you know it didn't work? asks Ouvert.

Because Gaius used the Omniscient Stone to make teeth for Sweezus's dog, Farky, says Baby Pierre. To be fair, the teeth were omniscient.

Wow! What happened to Farky? asks Ouvert. Was he famous?

Kidnapped, says Baby Pierre.