The Unbearable Lightness of Shopping

We have four birthdays coming up ! said Pliny's mum. We'd better do some shopping. So Pliny and her mum went to town today to do just that. What are we doing first? said Pliny's mum, when they met in David Jones, having lunch? Yes, said Pliny, so they had lunch.

Now, said Pliny's mum what are we doing next? Well, said Pliny, whose birthday is first? Michael's. So his present should be bought first. Right, said Pliny's mum. I wondered if he might like a Parker pen? That is if I can't get him those fluffy thongs. Good idea, said Pliny, let's have a quick look for fluffy thongs and then go and buy a Parker pen if we can't find any. Shall we look in here? Yes, said Pliny's mum. Unfortunately they had both forgotten that David Jones do not stock those fluffy thongs, did not last year and did not the year before. But they do sell Parker pens.

Now who is next? said Pliny's mum. Allan. Yes, said Pliny, but Lucy's present has to be posted by the 20th, so really she should be next. Right, said Pliny's mum. So they went to the children's department which by good fortune was on the same floor as the pens were and the thongs were not.

We are doing well, said Pliny's mum. Now what did Chris say, she has too many clothes so send toys? No, said Pliny, he said she has too many toys so send clothes.

Now in case Lucy's mum reads this before the present arrives I shall not reveal any details of the delightful red and blue size one garment that was subsequently bought by Pliny's mum.

I shall also resort to using dots in the next paragraph for similar reasons.

Now Allan, said Pliny's mum. I have no idea. Would he like a .......? He might, said Pliny. Let's look at .........s in Myers. The .........s in Myers were all too .......y, so they looked in ............ There Pliny's mum found a ........ that suited her criteria for a ........ Pliny was not too sure that it would suit Allan's criteria, but she agreed it was a nice one. That was only $....., said Pliny's mum, what else can I get him? You could always get him some ........s sighed Pliny, but we'll have to go back to Myers. So they did. Pliny's mum was particularly pleased with the ........s they found in Myers. Not only were they an up market brand but there was 30% off the marked price as well.

Now what about Sean? said Pliny's mum. Have you asked him what he wants? No, Pliny said, but I will. Men are so difficult to buy for, said Pliny's mum. Women are so easy. What did I get him for Xmas? I can't remember said Pliny. Neither can I, said Pliny's mum. Anyway we've done really well. Lets have a coffee and call that it.

Pliny looked down at her empty hands. The four birthdays were coming up for her as well. She thought that if life had any meaning it could be represented by that fact.