Pot Shots

Gaius pedals onwards and upwards, listening to the sounds of birdlife and smelling the wattle.

Trill! Squee! Rustle! Snifff!

Aiee!

Shurrrrrr......

He stops pedaling.

Kong Fu-Zi has stopped some way behind him, and dismounted.

Gaius goes back.

What's the matter? says Gaius. You're bleeding!

What kind of bird is that?, asks Kong Fu-Zi, pointing at one which is hastily disappearing.

A magpie, says Gaius. Have you been swooped?

I don't know. Have I? asks Kong Fu-Zi.

I would say, yes you have, says Gaius. You are bleeding from the head and a magpie is hastily disappearing.

You know a lot about birds, says Kong Fu-Zi.

I do. But not so much about people, says Gaius.

I know a great deal about people, says Kong Fu-Zi.

Get back on your bicycle, says Gaius. We must make Crafers by lunch time.

Come on Floating Cloud, says Kong Fu-Zi, to his bicycle.

He grasps hold of the handlebars.

I notice you call it Floating Cloud now, says Gaius. Why is that?

I harbour guilty feelings, says Kong Fu-Zi.

Perhaps we should have made more of an effort to contact Schopenhauer, says Gaius. I'm certain he would have no objection to your keeping it a few days longer.

They ride on in silence.

Only the birdsong, and the sounds of the wattle. Pff..pff..pff....

(Wattle, otherwise known as acacia).

Achoo!

Kong Fu-Zi starts sneezing.

The blood, which has dried on his cheeks and his clothing, cracks like a vertical jigsaw.

A police car roars up behind them, passes, turns in and stops.

A policeman gets out of the police car.

Gaius! says the policeman.

Victor! says Gaius. Not in Wallaroo?

No, sighs Victor. A policeman's life is necessarily motile.

Motile, says Gaius. Like a sperm. Good word. But what is the trouble? Have I been speeding?

Ha ha! Speeding! laughs Victor. No it's your friend. He's not wearing a helmet.

He was, says Gaius. But those peskiferous magpies knocked it right off his head. Look he's bleeding.

Well, well, says Victor( unaware that Kong Fu-Zi wasn't wearing a helmet, but a soft pointed hat). Well well, I shall take some pot shots at those magpies.

Good luck, says Gaius.

Thank you, says Victor. I suggest you buy a new helmet in Crafers, he adds, frowning at Kong Fu-Zi.

Kong Fu-Zi bows slightly, saying nothing. He knows people.

Yes yes, says Gaius. May we go on our way now? We're heading for Kuitpo to do a spot of birdwatching.

Really? says Victor.

Because the information may turn out to be useful, he writes it down in his notebook.