Naughty Tactile Function

The Bristlebirds flutter closer, waiting for Karma.

It comes.

Doctor Wallenius stands up, as though he is giving a lecture.

The function of rictal bristles around the beak of the Bristlebird is uncertain, begins Doctor Wallenius. Do they act as a net, to capture flying prey?

He looks around as though expecting an answer.

No? says Keanu.

Don't rule it out, says Doctor Wallenius.

Sweezus tries to picture the stiff hairlike feathers, acting as a net to capture flying prey.

 Freaky.

To protect their eyes? suggests Doctor Wallenius.

Freakier. Hairy sunnies.

The Bristlebirds have edged even closer. They are now above Katherine's head.

Do they perhaps serve a tactile function? continues Doctor Wallenius.

Yes? says Beau. (At school option three is often the answer).

What tactile function would that be? asks Unni.

Yes, what tactile function? whispers Mr Bristlebird.

Hee hee, gurgles Mrs Bristlebird. Naughty.

Mechanoreceptors sensitive to vibration and pressure, found in association with rictal bristles, may help with navigation and detection of prey, says Doctor Wallenius.

Navigation my tailfeathers! We never go anywhere, exclaims Mrs Bristlebird.

Where would we go, dear? enquires Mr Bristlebird.

I don't know, answers Mrs Bristlebird. But the idea's in my head now.

.....or information gathering during flight, or with handling of prey, finishes Doctor Wallenius. So, what does everyone think? You, Katherine? Katherine? May I ask what's so funny?

I was thinking, says Katherine, something quite funny.

What was it? pursues Doctor Wallenius.

Yes, Katherine, what was it? says Ray.

Well, if you must know, says Katherine, I thought it would be funny if a New Zealander said rictal bristles.

How come? asks Keanu.

His or her audience might make a wrong assumption, says Katherine.

Doctor Wallenius smiles briefly. He gets it.

I still don't get it, says Keanu.

The Bristlebirds don't get it either.

They hop over to a branch above Sweezus. At least he is a serious person. And he made them that promise.

Suddenly Mrs Bristlebird has an epiphany. Now she KNOWS WHERE SHE'S GOING.

She hops down to the shoulder of Sweezus.

EE-YAH! yells Sweezus. Get it OFF me!

Doctor Wallenius is shocked.

How could Gaius's man not like BIRDS?