Endangered Bird's Faecal DNA Lands On Your Bible

Rose has made six mugs of tea.

What would you kids like? asks Rose. Happy with water?

Mum sometimes lets us have Coke, says Beau.

Bet she doesn't, says Unni.

Rose gets two glasses of water.

Better for you, says Rose.

So, Doctor Wallenius, says Katherine, what's the verdict on your funnel web spider?

Too early to say, says Doctor Wallenius. There's a lot of testing involved. And do call me Tom.

Is it in that jar? asks Keanu.

No it isn't, it's back in the lab. This jar is for the next one.

Let's go! says Beau! Let's start looking!

Great to see you're so keen, says Doctor Wallenius. We're always glad of new helpers. Our research is part of a big biodiversity project.

Oh,Tom, says Unni. That's lovely. What else have you found?

Not me personally, says Tom, but Mark Wong found a red-fanged funnel web in Tallagonda State Forest recently.

Atrax sutherlandi, says Keanu.

That's a rare one, says Beau.

Good job! says Tom. You guys will be excellent helpers. Now, where was this spider you found?

He turns to Sweezus, who has been expecting this question.

I've got the GPS coordinates somewhere, says Sweezus, fiddling with his phone. Oh bummer!

What up? asks Tom.

Out of battery, says Sweezus, convincingly.

Tch! says Tom. Oh well. I've got the photo you sent me. Let's have a re-squiz.

(He brings up the photo)

Let's see, says Rose. Oh ha ha! That's heaps funny. Look at him, grinning like Jacky.

Ha ha, laughs Tom Wallenius. Not many people grin like that so close up to a funnel web spider.

I would! says Keanu.

(ever the smart arse)

Yeah, well, says Sweezus. I was prompted.

Let me see, says Tom Wallenius. Yes! This actually looks like the same hollow log where I found my specimen. We may not need the GPS coordinates.

That's lucky, says Rose. Well, I guess you'll want to be off then. Have you all got protective gloves?

Not surprisingly, only Tom has. But he has some spare pairs.

Okay then, says Rose. Oh wait, by the way, did you happen to see any Green and Gold Bell Frogs or Eastern Bristlebirds while you were camping?

No, we didn't, says Unni. Then she remembers.

Dad might have, says Unni.

I might what? says Ray, who has not been following, but thinking darkly of Woppa.

Yes, remember that bird that shat on your.... er... book? says Unni. Long tailed, grey brown, dappled underparts....

Wow! says Rose. So you spotted one.

And then it spotted him, says Katherine.

Dasyornis brachypterus, says Keanu.

If it was one, says Beau.

True, says Tom. We'd need more evidence. Have you still got the book, Ray?

Ray weighs up the pros and cons of saying he hasn't.