When The Sand Shifts

Proust, Albertine and Arthur cycle along the esplanade at Neptun.

On one side, hotels, funfairs, stalls, ice cream shops....

On the other, sea, white sands, rows of straw-topped beach umbrellas, and plastic lounges.

She won't be out yet, says Albertine. You guys wait here, and I'll find her.

Albertine disappears into the Hotel Callatis.

Arthur and Proust sit down under a beach umbrella.

I think we have to pay for these seats, says Proust.

Right, says Arthur.

A man comes up.

You have to pay to sit under these umbrellas, says the man. Five euros.

We're waiting for our aunt, says Arthur.

The duchess? asks the man. She sometimes sits here.

Yes, says Arthur. The duchess.

Okay, says the man. You can wait here for the duchess.

He goes off to harass someone else.

Duchess! says Proust. You don't suppose Albertine's aunt is a duchess?

We can ask her, says Arthur. Here they come now.

Albertine and a woman, who looks likes Albertine, stroll over the road in a leisurely fashion, and stop at the straw beach umbrella.

Proust and Arthur stand up (in case she's a duchess).

Aunt Daniel, says Albertine, her eyes flicking between them, these are my friends, Marcel Proust and Arthur Rimbaud. Marcel is the writer, and Arthur is a poet.

Delighted to meet you, says Aunt Daniel. I too am a writer. Do sit down again, both of you. Dear me, what are those bandages?

Arthur fell down a a shaft, says Albertine, and landed on broken bottles. Then he fell into a lake full of poison bacteria. He did it on purpose.

Goodness, what we writers do for our art! says Aunt Daniel. I do hope your knees won't go septic. You're such a handsome boy, too.

Arthur scowls, and sits down heavily on the lounge, which tips sideways.

Careful dear, says Aunt Daniel. Sometimes the sand shifts.

Albertine sniggers.

Proust feels he is being ignored.

I believe, Aunt Daniel, that your book is about a collection of Daniels, one of whom is of particular interest to a member of our party.

Ah yes, says Aunt Daniel. Do you?

Yes, aunt, says Albertine. All the Daniels, remember?

Aunt Daniel looks vague for a moment. All the Daniels?

Yes!..... Oh you're hopeless!

Sorry! I really can't do this, Albertine.

And they collapse into snorts of vulgar laughter.

I say, you young people, clear orf! says an elderly lady, looming up behind them

Crumbs! She'll be the duchess.

........

Later, the same morning:

Gaius is cycling towards Neptun, with Daniel O'Connell the spider, in a bottle.

Daniel O'Connell is triumphant.

Daniel O'Connell: Tiddley-doo! 'tis a fine morning!

Gaius: For you. I should have liked to stay longer in the underground labs.

Daniel O'Connell: To be sure, you learned all you could, from that fakery. Which was nothin'.

Gaius: If it was fakery ...

Daniel O'Connell: I know, I know. Why did I eat the exhibits?  And the answer is, Liberty!

Gaius: You have the wrong idea about liberty. No doubt Albertine's aunt will set you straight on the political ideals of your namesake.

Daniel O'Connell: Knowledge! Politics! Liberty! Bird's milk! Tooraloo! Tooraloo!