The Brutal Sailor

Belle arrives at the café, in time for the cakes.

Pane al cioccolato, vaniglia cupcake, torta al limone, torta di carote e noce.

Sorry I'm late, says Belle. I was inspecting the venue.

How is it? asks Vello, biting into a torta al limone.

It's outdoors on a slope, says Belle. 

Let's hope it doesn't rain, says David.

Let's hope it DOES! says Terence. I'm playing the Storm and the Earthquake.

Oh no! says Belle. Are you? 

Yes! says Terence. And this is my costume.

Aquamarine socks with a water-sports theme? says Belle. I think we can do better.

Make me a thunder and lightning shirt , says Terence. Black and purple and yellow. But I'm keeping the socks. I have to.

He does have to, says Sweezus. He's got that upside-down toe.

So has everyone agreed to be in it? asks Belle.

Yes, says Vello.

(although everyone hasn't)

I haven't agreed, says Arthur. 

The brutal sailor role will showcase your acting abilities, says Vello. 

And I haven't, says Ageless. 

There's only one part left, says David. The old woman.

I refuse to play the old woman, says Ageless,

It's not difficult, says Gaius. I played her last year. You'll be given a cushion to wear on your right buttock.

That was fine for you, says Ageless. But a lobster doesn't have buttocks.

We can make you a buttock, says Belle.  

Can I have a cupcake? asks Terence.

Have the other half of this one, says Sweezus. It's vanilla. It's yummy. 

Ageless winces, for some reason.

What does the brutal sailor do? asks Arthur.

During the tempest, says Vello, James the Anabaptist ( that's me ) assists you to climb on board again after you've been left dangling on a broken mast hanging over the ship's side. Due to my strenuous efforts I fall overboard myself. You ignore my plight and I perish. Later the ship splits in two, and you swim to shore. Pangloss and Candide cling to a plank and are washed up after you. After the earthquake you risk your life searching for money among the ruins, you find some, and get drunk.

Playing against type, says Gaius.

Thank you, says Arthur.