The Finer Points

I value your opinion, Farky, said Sweezus, but I feel that being a dog you don't appreciate the finer points of this particular piece of writing.

How so? asked Farky.

In this way, said Sweezus. I am a human, writing for humans. Humans usually enjoy it when another human uses an animal voice to make a point, especially if it has to do with animal rights or conservation.

That is no doubt true, agreed Farky. And I am not belittling your references to those issues. The point about the palm oil was well made. You may get good marks for your assignment for that reason. I merely object to your presumption that the Siamang are happy.


Meanwhile down below on the rocks beside the pond, the Siamang were listening.

Did you ear dat? said Siamang One.

No me not ear dat, me had de block ear, said Siamang Two.

Oooh you had de block ear? asked Siamang Three. Let me pick de wax.

Nooah! said Siamang Two. Tell me what de man said.

De man up der, he be sayin' somethin' about de Woop Woop.

Hoo Hoo! de Woop Woop! said Siamang Two. Why he say dat?

He be tellin' it to de dog in de Panda hat, said Siamang One.

Eeah! Dat some bad Panda hat. Let's up we now, said Siamang Three.

Aye, let's we up, agreed the other two.

And they swung themselves up into the tree.


They LOOK happy, said Sweezus, unhappily.

Perhaps they've learned to make the best of it, said Farky.

Now you're presuming, said Sweezus.

No I'm not, said Farky. It was just a proposition.