Halo Holy Mo

Vello, David and Terence are on the banks of the Rhone river, resting

Ring! Vello gets a phone call.

It's Belle.

Are you there yet? asks Belle. Are you in Ferney?

No we're still in Bellegarde-sur-Valserine, says Vello. They've ruined the Pertes. There's a horrible dam here.

It's called progress, says Belle. How's Terence? Is he behaving?

He's acting up at the moment, says Vello. I suppose you don't happen to know where his hat is?

The Peruvian hat with the side flaps? says Belle. No I don't. What does he need a hat for? Surely he's wearing a helmet.

Err, no, says Vello. He isn't.

Papa! says Belle. What if you have an accident? What if he falls out of his child seat and onto the road?

He has a hard head, says Vello.

But his little curls! says Belle. They might get chipped. His nose, even.

Would it matter? says Vello.

Get him a helmet, says Belle, before you go a step further.

All right, all right, says Vello. How are things back in Adelaide?

We're not back yet, says Belle. Sweezie and I are still in Paris. We're looking at the shops. I'm just passing one now. It's a hat shop.

Any with side flaps? asks Vello.

Just berets and pith helmets, says Belle. What? No! You'd look like a dickhead!

I didn't say anything, says Vello.

I was talking to Sweezie. He wants to buy a pith helmet, says Belle.

A pith helmet! Ha ha! laughs Vello. He'll look like a dickhead.

David and Terence are listening.

Who'll look like a dickhead? asks David.

Sweezus, in a pith helmet, says Vello. Can you imagine?

What's a pith helmet? asks Terence.

It's a lightweight sun helmet made of dried pith, says David. They wear them in the tropics.

I want one, says Terence.

He wants one, says Vello.

Who, Terence? asks Belle. Terence wants one? All right, tell him I'll buy one and send it to Ferney.

You're getting one, Terence, says Vello. A pith helmet. And you'll look like a di.......just like Sweezus.

Yay, says Terence. Are pith helmets golden?

No, says Vello.

Who knows what the little monkey is thinking?

Buy one for me while you're at it, says Vello. I rather fancy wearing a pith helmet in Ferney.

Tell her I'd like one too, says David.

David says he'd like one too, says Vello.

All right, says Belle. On your own heads be it.

Ha ha, very good, says Vello. Bye dear!

He leans back on the grassy embankment.

David leans back as well.

The sun warms their faces. The Rhone tumbles by.

I wonder who's taking care of the office, murmurs Vello. Should have asked her......

A dragon fly buzzes.

David snoozes.

Terence invents a pith hat song, which reveals, were anyone listening, exactly what he is thinking:

a pith hat for me
made of dried wee
halo-holy-mo
a pith hat for me
made of dried wee
halo-holy-moly