One And The Same

The town of Ferney was once called Fernex, says Segolène. And Voltaire renamed it.

Why did he do that? asks David.

Too many towns around here ending in 'ex', says Vello.

I didn't ask you, says David.

Your friend is quite right, says Segolène. That was the reason.

And why did he come here in the first place? asks David.

Close enough to Geneva to annoy the Genevans, says Vello.

Would YOU like to be the tour leader? says Segolène. You seem to know everything.

Not at all, dear madame, says Vello. But I wonder, have you noticed a certain resemblance between me and the statue?

Segolène looks up at the statue.

She looks at Vello.

You both have big noses, says Segolène.

Terence now becomes interested.

I used to have a big nose, says Terence. Long as a banana.

Ignore him, says Vello.

Segolène is still looking at Vello's nose. His sardonic expression. Yes. Perhaps he is a descendent?

Are you related to our famous philosopher? asks Segolène.

Time to come clean, old fellow, says David.

Ahem, says Vello. Yes. I am one and the same.

So am I, says Terence. One and the same. But some of my nose dropped off, so I look different.

Terence, says David. Shut up.

It is bad to speak to young children that way, says Segolène. Let us at once stop this nonsense and continue the tour. Follow me. I will next show you the church that Voltaire founded.

Ah ha ha! laughs David. You never told me you founded a church!

Hm. I had forgotten, says Vello. Is it still standing?

Of course, says Segolène. Just over there.

They trundle over.

Here we see Voltaire's dedication, says Segolène. It demonstrates that he was quite bumptious.

Bumptious! says Vello. What did I put?

It reads 'Deo erexit VOLTAIRE', says Segolène, jabbing unnecessarily at the capital letters.

As you see, he gives himself precedence over the almighty. His own name in capital letters. God's in lower case, says Segolène.

Woo! says Terence. I'm telling Grandpa.

Your grandpa, is he a man of religion? asks Segolène.

He's the BOSS of religion, says Terence.

Infantile fantasy, says David. His Granpa is Karl Marx. Hardly a man of religion.

Segolène is beginning to wonder if her tour might be shortened.

Come, she says tartly. I will show you the one hundred houses. And then we shall visit the château.

They follow her, chastened.