Slap Slam And Squee Squee

Lille.

In the sea-themed oyster bar, Arthur is scribbling:

stained glass slime
bilious flashes
empty table

And Pablo beside him is writing:

a tear in the teardrop
where outfalls
materialise

Yes they have drunk rather a lot.

So inspired by their poetic writings are they, that time ticks by rapidly.

So rapidly, that Gaius and Virtual Gaius have turned up.

Ah, there you are, boys, says Gaius. What a piece of good luck.

Pablo looks doubtful.

Hello Pablo, says Virtual Gaius. What are you writing?

Pablo shows him the poem in progress.

Outfalls materialise, says Virtual Gaius. I like it.

It's not finished, says Pablo.

I realise that, says Virtual Gaius. Something of consequence must happen.

Pablo writes: 'something of consequence must happen', and sits back to regard his paper napkin.

Arthur looks up at Gaius. Gaius remembers why he is here.

I wanted to ask you, says Gaius, because I think you will know.....but you must tell me if I am mistaken.

What? says Arthur. Is it about HIM? (indicating Virtual Gaius).

It's not my field of expertise, says Gaius.

Je est un autre, says Arthur.

What's that ? says Pablo.

I is another, says Arthur.

Is that meaningful? asks Gaius.

Yes, says Arthur. It's how I roll.

Gaius thinks about the advice he has just got from Arthur. who is usually reliable.

Hm.

I is another. Perhaps he should start thinking laterally.

Well then, says Gaius to Virtual Gaius. Shall we roll?

Not yet, says Virtual Gaius. I'm helping Pablo with his poem.

Ha! A difference. It is already working!

Thank you, Arthur, says Gaius. Good luck with the poetry slap.

Slam, says Arthur.

Yes, says Gaius. Slam. Good luck with it.

Have an oyster, says Arthur. While you're waiting.

Gaius helps himself to an oyster. He has long been a sucker for oysters.

( and Virtual Gaius has not).

......

Maçon.

Terence returns to the supermarket, with shiny cat ear studs.

There you are! says David. We're just choosing a cheese. Good lord, what's wrong with your ears?

Bleeding, says Terence.

They aren't bleeding, says Vello. You're wearing ear studs. Where did they come from?

I bought them, says Terence. I bought them with pain and excrooshing. These are my grommets.

Very nice, says David. Wait a minute. GROMMETS?

No need to shout, says Terence. They can hear perfectly. Listen.

Vello and David fall silent.

Squee-squee.

What was that? asks Terence.

Feet, says one of the cat studs.

Mouse, says the other.

Oh, says Terence. Here's trouble.