Number Three Is A Logical Reason

The sun glitters and birds twitter in the trees as Vello, David and Terence enter Ferney, wearing golden pith helmets.

The populace cheers.

Welcome! Welcome! Our benefactor! Hurrah!

No wait, that is just a dream Vello is having. He wakes up, and is still by the river.

David is snoozing and Terence is humming a song.

Holy moly.

Up, boys! cries Vello. Time to move on.

David starts. Ach! What time is it?

Noon, says Vello. If we get going we'll be in Ferney for afternoon tea time.

Will our piss hats be there? asks Terence.

Pith hats, says David. I shouldn't think so. They'll be coming from Paris. Where was Belle going to send them?

To the château, of course, says Vello. They'll probably turn up in the letter box tomorrow morning.

Your château had a letter box? says David.

Well, no, says Vello. Not back in those days. But things will have changed with the times. There will be a letter box.

Three hats might be too large for a letter box, says David.

All the more reason to hurry, says Vello. They might be at the post office.

Terence, who has been happily humming, screws his face up.

A few cement flakes drop off the end of his nose, and a light breeze blows them into the river.

This reminds Vello that he has promised to buy Terence a bicycle helmet.

What a bother.

He now decides against it, for three logical reasons.

1. They are only 36 kilometres from Ferney.
2. Terence will soon have a pith helmet.
3. If cement flakes fall off when he screws up his face, a helmet will make little difference.

( not everyone would agree that number 3 is a logical reason )

They set off in the direction of Ferney.

.......

The birds twitter in the glittering sunshine.

The trees sway and bend.

Vehicles too.

This is Ferney.

It's bigger than it was when I lived here, says Vello, stopping in the town square in front of a statue.

He looks up at the statue.

David doesn't.

What's that up there? says Vello.

A Parallax! says Terence.

David looks up.

It's a pigeon, says David. Shitting on the head of..... oh ha ha, it's YOU, Vello.

Shoo! Shoo! says Vello.

The pigeon flies off, in a flutter of feathers and grit.

Are you here for the tour? asks a woman.

No, says David.

Yes, says Terence.

Good, says the woman. I was beginning to think no one was coming. My name is Segolène, and I'm your tour guide for today. Now what do we know about this fellow?

She points up at the statue.

A Parallax pooped on his head, says Terence. But don't worry. We're getting piss hats tomorrow.

Pith hats, says David.

Ignore them, says Vello.  Tell me all you know about this wonderful fellow.

Certainly. You will be amazed, says Segolène.

Well. This is promising!