Reason Is Feminine

Gaius's problem: He wants his bike back. He doesn't know where it is.

Tonight he is dining with Dr Arjan Egges and Dr Rolland Geraerts, who have hidden it.

He has every intention of broaching the subject.

Gaius: Delicious dinner.

Dr Arjan: I find most people like Vijfshaft.

Gaius: I, particularly. Beans, potatoes, carrots, onion and apple. What a treat. However, now that we've eaten, I have a request.

Dr Rolland: Dessert is next. It's something special. We've made Hernhutterjes.

Gaius: I don't normally eat dessert, but if you've prepared it.....

The doctors produce rolled up cinnamon and aniseed biscuits. They eat them. Gaius tries again.

Gaius: Now for my request.

Dr Arjan: Coffee? Jenever?

Gaius: I can't help thinking you don't wish to hear it.

Dr Arjan: Okay, what is it?

Gaius: I want my bicycle back. I have stayed long enough.

Dr Rolland: But we have so much more to discover. We've just scratched the surface.

Gaius: Not literally, I hope. It belongs to Schopenhauer.

Dr Rolland: Of course not. Our research is virtual. But this morning, I was sitting on the seat of the bicycle, hooked up to detect random neurological algorithms, and, quite out of the blue I thought:

"Reason is feminine"

Dr Rolland: And we don't know where that came from.

Gaius: Sounds exactly like Schopenhauer. Who else would say something like that?

Dr Arjan: What is meant by it?

Gaius: How in Jupiter's name should I know?

Dr Rolland: Perhaps this: it can only give after it has received. Of itself, it has nothing but the empty forms of its operation.

Gaius: Now you sound just like him. It's affecting you badly. And you're not even sitting on it. Is it nearby?

Dr Arjan; Actually it's not that far away. It's in the kitchen.

Gaius: Ah! I mean......Hm. Is it? Well, well, after such a fine dinner, the least I can do is help with the dishes.

........

Thousands of kilometres away, in Adelaide, Sweezus is having dinner with Katherine.

Katherine: I thought you would like vegetarian.

Sweezus: You've mixed me up with a vegetarian.

Katherine: Well, it won't hurt for once to eat kale chips and tofu with beans.

Sweezus: Yeah. Your rellies aren't vegetarian are they?

Katherine: Of course not. You've met them. They eat lots of sausages. Fish and Butterfly like them.

Sweezus: Cool. And which one's birthday is it?

Katherine: Fish's. He'll be six. I've bought him a Fart Gun. Have you bought him a present?

Sweezus : Shit no. Didn't think of it. Been boning up on funnel web spiders.

Katherine: Very commendable. You know they can't jump, I suppose.

Sweezus: Um, no, but I was hoping.

Katherine: Knowledge is power, young man.

Sweezus: Wicked! Mind if I tweet that?

Katherine: I sometimes wonder if you're cleverer than you make out.