Gaius and Katherine are looking for Terence, in the forest.
He can't be far off, says Gaius.
I hope not, says Katherine. What did he do?
It was my fault, says Gaius. I told him to tap me on the shoulder if he heard something. He tapped me. I dropped my notes, and when I realised the pages weren't numbered, I became testy.
You should always number your notes, says Katherine. Are they still in a muddle?
Yes, says Gaius. I was hoping to see Arthur in the café. But he wasn't there.
I saw him, says Katherine. He told me he'd been up a tree.
Up a tree? says Gaius. Did he say what he was doing?
Fixing a broadcasting device, says Katherine. I asked if it was yours, but he told me it wasn't.
So whose was it? asks Gaius.
I had no time to ask. He went off to meet someone, says Katherine.
The owner of the broadcasting device, says Gaius.
Most probably, says Katherine.
Perhaps we'll come across them, says Gaius.
Or hear the broadcast, says Katherine.
Good thinking, says Gaius.
They stop and listen.
They do not hear the broadcast.
They hear Terence a few trees away, saying crossly: Because I'm the team leader!
And two parrots apologising.
Sorry. Sorry.
Katherine and Gaius creep forward.
Terence continues to lecture the parrots.
Don't talk. Be quiet, like me.
Okay, says Jinjing. Is it okay if we whisper?
No! says Terence. What would you whisper?
The same things were were saying loudly before, says Swift Parrot.
Gaius can't contain his excitement. He bursts round a tree.
Bumhole! says Terence. You scared them.
The Swift Parrot has swiftly departed.
That was unprofessional, Gaius, says Katherine. You frightened the bird off.
I'll go after him, says Jinjing. He rises, hovers and shoots through the trees after his new friend the Swift Parrot.
That was Swift Parrot, says Terence. He was rubbish at listening.
I wouldn't say that, says Katherine. He heard us.
You were loud! says Terence. And now look. I've lost all my parrots.
I could kick myself, says Gaius. A Swift Parrot!
He might come back, says Terence. He LOVES Jinjing.
Did he say so? asks Gaius. What type of love are we talking?
What a question to ask Terence, says Katherine. Now Terence, I don't have long. But how would you like to talk to your little friend Jerry? He's going to visit the Lighthouse.
My mission is ruined, and my team has disappeared, says Terence. What Lighthouse?
Saturday, November 30, 2019
Friday, November 29, 2019
Green Flash Whizz
Arthur has finished his banana and bacon breakfast.
Now to get that map from Amanda.
He is just about to stand up when Katherine enters the café.
Still here Arthur? says Katherine. How's the bad knee?
Okay, says Arthur. I climbed a tree with it, no problem.
Really? says Katherine. What tree might that be?
A white gum, says Arthur. I was fixing a broadcasting device to the upper branches.
Don't tell me Gaius has a broadcasting device, says Katherine.
He doesn't, says Arthur. How come you're here?
I've brought Gaius some cheeses, says Katherine. We arranged to meet here.
I was just going, says Arthur.
I'll wait here for Gaius, says Katherine. Take care of your knee.
She says that because she has noticed Arthur's new bandage is smeared with a yellow excrescence.
It could be banana; she would not know.
Arthur leaves, missing Gaius, who turns up the next minute.
Hello Katherine, says Gaius. Kind of you to come back with the cheeses.
Not at all, says Katherine. Where's Terence?
........
Where is Terence?
He is in the eucalypt forest, with Jinjing.
They are listening.
A green flash whizzes by them.
And turns back, landing on a low branch.
It has long pointed wings and long tapering tail feathers. A bluish green crown, red face and shoulders.
It speaks: Waiting for someone?
Spotty, says Terence.
A forty spotted pardalote, says Jinijng. Have you seen one?
I'm a Swift Parrot, says the Swift Parrot.
You say that proudly, says Jinjing.
I do say that proudly, says the Swift Parrot.
And you think we should be looking for you, says Jinjing.
Exactly right, says the Swift Parrot. Everyone else is.
We're not, says Terence. We're looking for Spotty.
That's a JOKE, says the Swift Parrot. Ha Ha! Did the Beautiful Firetails tell you about Spotty?
Shut up! says Terence. Don't you know how to listen?
You bet I don't! says the Swift Parrot.
Then start, says Terence. That's what the job is.
He's only just gone independent, says Jinjing. Humour him.
The Swift Parrot finds Jinjing strangely attractive.
Why not?
He settles down to listen.
Now to get that map from Amanda.
He is just about to stand up when Katherine enters the café.
Still here Arthur? says Katherine. How's the bad knee?
Okay, says Arthur. I climbed a tree with it, no problem.
Really? says Katherine. What tree might that be?
A white gum, says Arthur. I was fixing a broadcasting device to the upper branches.
Don't tell me Gaius has a broadcasting device, says Katherine.
He doesn't, says Arthur. How come you're here?
I've brought Gaius some cheeses, says Katherine. We arranged to meet here.
I was just going, says Arthur.
I'll wait here for Gaius, says Katherine. Take care of your knee.
She says that because she has noticed Arthur's new bandage is smeared with a yellow excrescence.
It could be banana; she would not know.
Arthur leaves, missing Gaius, who turns up the next minute.
Hello Katherine, says Gaius. Kind of you to come back with the cheeses.
Not at all, says Katherine. Where's Terence?
........
Where is Terence?
He is in the eucalypt forest, with Jinjing.
They are listening.
A green flash whizzes by them.
And turns back, landing on a low branch.
It has long pointed wings and long tapering tail feathers. A bluish green crown, red face and shoulders.
It speaks: Waiting for someone?
Spotty, says Terence.
A forty spotted pardalote, says Jinijng. Have you seen one?
I'm a Swift Parrot, says the Swift Parrot.
You say that proudly, says Jinjing.
I do say that proudly, says the Swift Parrot.
And you think we should be looking for you, says Jinjing.
Exactly right, says the Swift Parrot. Everyone else is.
We're not, says Terence. We're looking for Spotty.
That's a JOKE, says the Swift Parrot. Ha Ha! Did the Beautiful Firetails tell you about Spotty?
Shut up! says Terence. Don't you know how to listen?
You bet I don't! says the Swift Parrot.
Then start, says Terence. That's what the job is.
He's only just gone independent, says Jinjing. Humour him.
The Swift Parrot finds Jinjing strangely attractive.
Why not?
He settles down to listen.
Thursday, November 28, 2019
No Human Perceives it
Gaius has every intention of leaving the eucalypt forest.
He stands.
He stuffs his unsorted papers into his back pack.
He turns.
But then: A green flash whizzes by him.
If he is not mistaken the green flash had long pointed wings and tapering tail feathers.
Could it have been a critically endangered Swift Parrot?
The bird passed him before he could register its other features.
He squats again, and keeps very still.
Nothing else happens for twenty minutes.
He stands.
I must leave now, says Gaius. As it is, I shall be late meeting Katherine.
All is quiet, in the eucalypt forest.
A green flash whizzes by, and no human perceives it.
Gaius has left to meet Katherine and pick up his cheese.
He will be late, though.
Katherine is running late too.
She was held up at the Cheese Co, when she bumped into Dad, Mum and Jerry.
That's Terence's grandma! says Jerry.
I'm not his grandma, says Katherine. But I remember you from the kiosk. You and your Spew Balls.
He's finished his Spew Balls, says Mum. But they've spoiled his appetite. Now he won't even look at the cheeses.
Such nice cheeses, says Katherine. And some have names which suggest their French origins. Tom for example, referencing Tomme, a French Savoie cheese.
Yes I noticed, says Mum. Are you buying the Tom?
No, I thought I'd get an Oen, a Saint and an Otto, and maybe a Nanna.
The Nanna's matured in compost, says Dad. What are we supposed to make of that?
Herb and lavender compost, says Mum.
Then why call it compost? says Dad.
It stinks, says Jerry.
You and Terence would get on well, says Katherine.
They did, says Mum. In fact we were just talking about Terence.
Because I'm BORED, says Jerry.
Terence is busy looking for endangered birds, says Katherine.
We're heading to South Bruny to check out the Lighthouse, says Dad.
I'm taking some cheeses to Gaius, says Katherine. Then I'm going back to the mainland.
I wish I was looking for endangered birds, says Jerry.
Terence probably wishes he was going to the Lighthouse, says Katherine.
Perhaps we could give him a call, says Mum. He and Jerry could talk about their adventures.
What a lovely idea, says Katherine. I'll give you my number. No, better still give me yours. I'll call you when I'm with Terence. Won't that be nice, Jerry?
Jerry wrinkles his nose, like someone who's just smelled a Nanna.
He stands.
He stuffs his unsorted papers into his back pack.
He turns.
But then: A green flash whizzes by him.
If he is not mistaken the green flash had long pointed wings and tapering tail feathers.
Could it have been a critically endangered Swift Parrot?
The bird passed him before he could register its other features.
He squats again, and keeps very still.
Nothing else happens for twenty minutes.
He stands.
I must leave now, says Gaius. As it is, I shall be late meeting Katherine.
All is quiet, in the eucalypt forest.
A green flash whizzes by, and no human perceives it.
Gaius has left to meet Katherine and pick up his cheese.
He will be late, though.
Katherine is running late too.
She was held up at the Cheese Co, when she bumped into Dad, Mum and Jerry.
That's Terence's grandma! says Jerry.
I'm not his grandma, says Katherine. But I remember you from the kiosk. You and your Spew Balls.
He's finished his Spew Balls, says Mum. But they've spoiled his appetite. Now he won't even look at the cheeses.
Such nice cheeses, says Katherine. And some have names which suggest their French origins. Tom for example, referencing Tomme, a French Savoie cheese.
Yes I noticed, says Mum. Are you buying the Tom?
No, I thought I'd get an Oen, a Saint and an Otto, and maybe a Nanna.
The Nanna's matured in compost, says Dad. What are we supposed to make of that?
Herb and lavender compost, says Mum.
Then why call it compost? says Dad.
It stinks, says Jerry.
You and Terence would get on well, says Katherine.
They did, says Mum. In fact we were just talking about Terence.
Because I'm BORED, says Jerry.
Terence is busy looking for endangered birds, says Katherine.
We're heading to South Bruny to check out the Lighthouse, says Dad.
I'm taking some cheeses to Gaius, says Katherine. Then I'm going back to the mainland.
I wish I was looking for endangered birds, says Jerry.
Terence probably wishes he was going to the Lighthouse, says Katherine.
Perhaps we could give him a call, says Mum. He and Jerry could talk about their adventures.
What a lovely idea, says Katherine. I'll give you my number. No, better still give me yours. I'll call you when I'm with Terence. Won't that be nice, Jerry?
Jerry wrinkles his nose, like someone who's just smelled a Nanna.
Wednesday, November 27, 2019
Chance And Cheese
Now what? asks Terence.
We wait for Arthur to come back with a map, says Jinjing.
Are we lost? asks Terence.
No, says Jinjing. Arthur took a photo of a forty spotted pardalote. Amanda wants us to mark the spot where he saw it.
Where? asks Terence.
On the map, says Jinjing.
But where did he see it? asks Terence
He didn't see it, says Jinjing.
But you SAID, says Terence.
It was behind him, says Jinjing. Arthur was taking a selfie. And the pardalote was in it.
Did he know? asks Terence.
Arthur or the forty spotted pardalote? asks Jinjing.
The bird, stupid, says Terence. I know Arthur didn't, because the bird was behind him.
No, I don't suppose the bird knew, says Jinjing. It flew off, soon after.
This seems like a complicated bird spotting method to Terence.
What if Arthur sees another one while he's walking? says Terence.
He'll have to remember where he saw it, says Jinjing.
What if it's the same one? asks Terence.
What did you say you were doing before you became independent? asks Jinjing.
Listening, says Terence.
Well, let's just do that, says Jinjing.
.......
Gaius is also listening, some short distance away.
It's quiet without Terence.
He has retrieved all his papers, and is trying to put them in order.
It would help if the pages were numbered.
A future task for Arthur.
He wonders how Arthur is doing. Perhaps he should call.
But this is not the time or the place for a phone call.
His phone rings. Several birds who had been quiet in nearby trees fly away.
Drat! What type of birds were they?
He answers abruptly. Yes, who is it?
It's Katherine. Surely Gaius, you have me in your list of contacts. Couldn't you see who was calling?
I didn't look, says Gaius. Several birds have flown away, unidentified, startled by your phone call.
Very sorry, says Katherine. But if that's the case, why isn't your phone switched to silent?
Too late now, says Gaius. Birds have flown. What is it?
I'm at the Bruny Island Cheese Co, says Katherine, and they have such wonderful cheeses. I thought of you, with your cracked tooth. There are some lovely soft ones.
I'd forgotten about my tooth until you reminded me, says Gaius.
Nevertheless, says Katherine. I could drop by with one. There's one called o.d.o, it's one day old, marinated in olive oil with fresh garlic, roast capsicum and herbs.
One day old, I wouldn't trust that, says Gaius. What else is there?
Oen, says Katherine, pinot washed in vine leaves. Soft and fudgey. Or the Saint, soft and oozy.
Gaius had not given a moment's thought to cheese since he sat down to bird watch. But now he feels peckish.
They both sound very pleasant, says Gaius.
So where are you? asks Katherine.
In a forest. I'll meet you at the Jetty Café, in half an hour, says Gaius.
See you there, says Katherine.
Gaius sighs. That's half the morning's bird watching ruined.
But look on the bright side.
Cheese.
And a chance to get his notes sorted properly by Arthur.
We wait for Arthur to come back with a map, says Jinjing.
Are we lost? asks Terence.
No, says Jinjing. Arthur took a photo of a forty spotted pardalote. Amanda wants us to mark the spot where he saw it.
Where? asks Terence.
On the map, says Jinjing.
But where did he see it? asks Terence
He didn't see it, says Jinjing.
But you SAID, says Terence.
It was behind him, says Jinjing. Arthur was taking a selfie. And the pardalote was in it.
Did he know? asks Terence.
Arthur or the forty spotted pardalote? asks Jinjing.
The bird, stupid, says Terence. I know Arthur didn't, because the bird was behind him.
No, I don't suppose the bird knew, says Jinjing. It flew off, soon after.
This seems like a complicated bird spotting method to Terence.
What if Arthur sees another one while he's walking? says Terence.
He'll have to remember where he saw it, says Jinjing.
What if it's the same one? asks Terence.
What did you say you were doing before you became independent? asks Jinjing.
Listening, says Terence.
Well, let's just do that, says Jinjing.
.......
Gaius is also listening, some short distance away.
It's quiet without Terence.
He has retrieved all his papers, and is trying to put them in order.
It would help if the pages were numbered.
A future task for Arthur.
He wonders how Arthur is doing. Perhaps he should call.
But this is not the time or the place for a phone call.
His phone rings. Several birds who had been quiet in nearby trees fly away.
Drat! What type of birds were they?
He answers abruptly. Yes, who is it?
It's Katherine. Surely Gaius, you have me in your list of contacts. Couldn't you see who was calling?
I didn't look, says Gaius. Several birds have flown away, unidentified, startled by your phone call.
Very sorry, says Katherine. But if that's the case, why isn't your phone switched to silent?
Too late now, says Gaius. Birds have flown. What is it?
I'm at the Bruny Island Cheese Co, says Katherine, and they have such wonderful cheeses. I thought of you, with your cracked tooth. There are some lovely soft ones.
I'd forgotten about my tooth until you reminded me, says Gaius.
Nevertheless, says Katherine. I could drop by with one. There's one called o.d.o, it's one day old, marinated in olive oil with fresh garlic, roast capsicum and herbs.
One day old, I wouldn't trust that, says Gaius. What else is there?
Oen, says Katherine, pinot washed in vine leaves. Soft and fudgey. Or the Saint, soft and oozy.
Gaius had not given a moment's thought to cheese since he sat down to bird watch. But now he feels peckish.
They both sound very pleasant, says Gaius.
So where are you? asks Katherine.
In a forest. I'll meet you at the Jetty Café, in half an hour, says Gaius.
See you there, says Katherine.
Gaius sighs. That's half the morning's bird watching ruined.
But look on the bright side.
Cheese.
And a chance to get his notes sorted properly by Arthur.
Tuesday, November 26, 2019
How To Be Silent
Amanda is up in a tree when she receives Arthur's selfie.
She drops a few zip ties, while getting out her phone.
Doesn't matter. She has more of them.
She looks at the photo.
Arthur is quite a good looking young man. Could do with a haircut.
But his eyes are pale blue, irradiated with dark blue. How unusual.
She remembers she is meant to be looking at the bird in the background.
Yes, it could well be a forty spotted pardalote, side on.
She counts twenty spots.
She calls Arthur.
Well done, you've spotted your first one. Place a dot on the survey map.
Haven't got one, says Arthur.
Send your drone robot, says Amanda. I'll give him a copy.
Okay, says Arthur.
Jinjing is tired of being a gopher.
I'll go, says Jinjing, But I might take a break before I come back.
Bring some food, says Arthur.
Better idea, says Jinjing. How about you go, and I wait here. I know how to be silent.
Arthur knows how to be silent, but he also wants food. And lurking is boring.
He will go back and find Amanda.
No. First he will go back to the Jetty Café and pick up some food. That banana and bacon breakfast.
Okay, says Arthur. If you see any whatsits or hear any wheet-wheets, let me know.
Sure, says Jinjing. I'll make a note. Now go, and go quietly.
Arthur tiptoes away.
Wheet-wheet!
That was fast, thinks Jinjing. I wouldn't have expected to hear one so soon.
But who is this crashing through the low shrubbery?
It's Terence.
He had been doing his task. Listening. He had heard a wheet-wheet sound. He had silently tapped Gaius on the shoulder. Gaius had turned rather suddenly, and all his bird notes had scattered. Gaius had been... not angry... but flustered. Maybe worse than flustered. But not angry, no.
However, after that, Terence had decided to follow the wheet-wheet independently.
Which had led him to Jinjing.
Can we talk? asks Terence.
Of course, says Jinjing. Why not?
I'm not allowed to, says Terence. I'm listening.
I'm listening too, says Jinjing. I heard a wheet-wheet.
No, I heard it, says Terence. I was supposed to tap Gaius, and I tapped him.
What went wrong? asks Jinjing.
Everything, says Terence. His papers blew off.
Was he angry? asks Jinjing.
No, says Terence, but I'm now independent.
That's good, says Jinjing. You will grow as a person.
Debatable. But it was a nice thing to tell Terence.
She drops a few zip ties, while getting out her phone.
Doesn't matter. She has more of them.
She looks at the photo.
Arthur is quite a good looking young man. Could do with a haircut.
But his eyes are pale blue, irradiated with dark blue. How unusual.
She remembers she is meant to be looking at the bird in the background.
Yes, it could well be a forty spotted pardalote, side on.
She counts twenty spots.
She calls Arthur.
Well done, you've spotted your first one. Place a dot on the survey map.
Haven't got one, says Arthur.
Send your drone robot, says Amanda. I'll give him a copy.
Okay, says Arthur.
Jinjing is tired of being a gopher.
I'll go, says Jinjing, But I might take a break before I come back.
Bring some food, says Arthur.
Better idea, says Jinjing. How about you go, and I wait here. I know how to be silent.
Arthur knows how to be silent, but he also wants food. And lurking is boring.
He will go back and find Amanda.
No. First he will go back to the Jetty Café and pick up some food. That banana and bacon breakfast.
Okay, says Arthur. If you see any whatsits or hear any wheet-wheets, let me know.
Sure, says Jinjing. I'll make a note. Now go, and go quietly.
Arthur tiptoes away.
Wheet-wheet!
That was fast, thinks Jinjing. I wouldn't have expected to hear one so soon.
But who is this crashing through the low shrubbery?
It's Terence.
He had been doing his task. Listening. He had heard a wheet-wheet sound. He had silently tapped Gaius on the shoulder. Gaius had turned rather suddenly, and all his bird notes had scattered. Gaius had been... not angry... but flustered. Maybe worse than flustered. But not angry, no.
However, after that, Terence had decided to follow the wheet-wheet independently.
Which had led him to Jinjing.
Can we talk? asks Terence.
Of course, says Jinjing. Why not?
I'm not allowed to, says Terence. I'm listening.
I'm listening too, says Jinjing. I heard a wheet-wheet.
No, I heard it, says Terence. I was supposed to tap Gaius, and I tapped him.
What went wrong? asks Jinjing.
Everything, says Terence. His papers blew off.
Was he angry? asks Jinjing.
No, says Terence, but I'm now independent.
That's good, says Jinjing. You will grow as a person.
Debatable. But it was a nice thing to tell Terence.
Monday, November 25, 2019
Modern Bird Watching
Arthur has climbed down the tree, leaving the broadcasting device on.
Now he's supposed to lurk somewhere, waiting.
He looks for a suitable spot.
He finds one.
I'll lurk somewhere nearby, says Jinjing. Two lurkers in the same spot might look suspicious.
Jinjing looks for a suitable spot.
He finds one.
Nothing to do now but wait.
Sleep-may-be, sleep-may-be, sleep may be! (That's the recording).
Wheet-wheet! (That's not).
Did you hear that? asks Arthur.
I did hear it, says Jinjing. Wheet-wheet. It's not on our recording.
Go and find Amanda, says Arthur.
Okay, says Jinjing.
She is some distance away, up another tree, attaching a broadcasting device.
She is not using string.
Arthur used string, says Jinjing.
Why? asks Amanda. I gave him some zip ties.
He must have dropped them, says Jinjing.
Easy to do. Other than that, how's it going? asks Amanda.
We have a question, says Jinjing. Is wheet-wheet in the forty spotted pardalote's vocabulary?
Yes, says Amanda. But it's tricky. The call and response are a single wheet, so it's two birds communicating. Makes it hard to pinpoint the direction.
But they must do it, says Jinjing. Thanks. I'll tell Arthur.
Before you go, says Amanda, does Arthur have a camera?
Yes, says Jinjing. He took a selfie, up in the tree. There was a bird in it.
Get him to send it to me, says Amanda. And any other birds he spots, too.
Okay, says Jinjing.
He flies off, back to Arthur.
Any info? asks Arthur.
Yes, says Jinjing.
He explains the call and response wheets. Wheet-wheet means two birds in two different locations.
Complicated, says Arthur. But not my problem. Anything else?
She wants you to send her the selfie, says Jinjing. I told her there was a bird in it.
What's her number? asks Arthur.
Jinjing sighs. He will have to fly back again,.
Really! Modern bird watching sucks.
Now he's supposed to lurk somewhere, waiting.
He looks for a suitable spot.
He finds one.
I'll lurk somewhere nearby, says Jinjing. Two lurkers in the same spot might look suspicious.
Jinjing looks for a suitable spot.
He finds one.
Nothing to do now but wait.
Sleep-may-be, sleep-may-be, sleep may be! (That's the recording).
Wheet-wheet! (That's not).
Did you hear that? asks Arthur.
I did hear it, says Jinjing. Wheet-wheet. It's not on our recording.
Go and find Amanda, says Arthur.
Okay, says Jinjing.
She is some distance away, up another tree, attaching a broadcasting device.
She is not using string.
Arthur used string, says Jinjing.
Why? asks Amanda. I gave him some zip ties.
He must have dropped them, says Jinjing.
Easy to do. Other than that, how's it going? asks Amanda.
We have a question, says Jinjing. Is wheet-wheet in the forty spotted pardalote's vocabulary?
Yes, says Amanda. But it's tricky. The call and response are a single wheet, so it's two birds communicating. Makes it hard to pinpoint the direction.
But they must do it, says Jinjing. Thanks. I'll tell Arthur.
Before you go, says Amanda, does Arthur have a camera?
Yes, says Jinjing. He took a selfie, up in the tree. There was a bird in it.
Get him to send it to me, says Amanda. And any other birds he spots, too.
Okay, says Jinjing.
He flies off, back to Arthur.
Any info? asks Arthur.
Yes, says Jinjing.
He explains the call and response wheets. Wheet-wheet means two birds in two different locations.
Complicated, says Arthur. But not my problem. Anything else?
She wants you to send her the selfie, says Jinjing. I told her there was a bird in it.
What's her number? asks Arthur.
Jinjing sighs. He will have to fly back again,.
Really! Modern bird watching sucks.
Sunday, November 24, 2019
Out, Off, Listen
Gaius waits under a eucalypt for Terence to catch up.
He has sent P. krameri to fetch him.
He's coming, says P. krameri, landing on the ground next to Gaius.
What's he doing? asks Gaius.
Hitting a tree with a stick, says P. krameri.
That won't do, says Gaius.
Terence stamps up, with his stick.
Put that stick away, says Gaius. You'll be scaring the birds off.
I was scaring them OUT, says Terence.
Out, off, says Gaius. Either way, they'll be leaving the area.
I saw one, says Terence.
What did it look like? asks Gaius. Try to recall.
I didn't recall, says Terence. I made a stick sound.
Try to remember, says Gaius.
Terence scrapes his stick on a tree.
What it LOOKED like, says Gaius. What were its colours?
Terence tries to remember. It flew by him so fast.
Blurry, says Terence.
Was it small, grey-brown in the upper parts, with pale spots, a black crown, wings and tail, white eyebrows and a reddish rump? asks Gaius.
Yes, says Terence, guessing.
Then it wasn't a forty spotted pardalote, says Gaius. It was a spotted pardelote. They are quite common.
It might not have had eyebrows, says Terence.
In that case we have a puzzle, says Gaius.
Terence scrapes the stick on a rock he has noticed.
A bird flies out from the top of the eucalypt under which they are standing.
But no one sees what kind it is.
I'll follow it, says P. krameri, taking off in the same direction.
Good bird, says Gaius. Now Terence, I shall give you a task.
What is it? asks Terence.
Listening, says Gaius. And there must be no sounds from you.
Or you, says Terence.
Or me, says Gaius. I want you to listen for the call of the forty spotted pardelote. It sounds like a squeaky swing. Or wheet-wheet. Or sleep-may-be.
Then what? asks Terence.
And if you hear it, come and silently tap me on the shoulder, says Gaius.
Terence nods. This is a good task. He can do it.
He has sent P. krameri to fetch him.
He's coming, says P. krameri, landing on the ground next to Gaius.
What's he doing? asks Gaius.
Hitting a tree with a stick, says P. krameri.
That won't do, says Gaius.
Terence stamps up, with his stick.
Put that stick away, says Gaius. You'll be scaring the birds off.
I was scaring them OUT, says Terence.
Out, off, says Gaius. Either way, they'll be leaving the area.
I saw one, says Terence.
What did it look like? asks Gaius. Try to recall.
I didn't recall, says Terence. I made a stick sound.
Try to remember, says Gaius.
Terence scrapes his stick on a tree.
What it LOOKED like, says Gaius. What were its colours?
Terence tries to remember. It flew by him so fast.
Blurry, says Terence.
Was it small, grey-brown in the upper parts, with pale spots, a black crown, wings and tail, white eyebrows and a reddish rump? asks Gaius.
Yes, says Terence, guessing.
Then it wasn't a forty spotted pardalote, says Gaius. It was a spotted pardelote. They are quite common.
It might not have had eyebrows, says Terence.
In that case we have a puzzle, says Gaius.
Terence scrapes the stick on a rock he has noticed.
A bird flies out from the top of the eucalypt under which they are standing.
But no one sees what kind it is.
I'll follow it, says P. krameri, taking off in the same direction.
Good bird, says Gaius. Now Terence, I shall give you a task.
What is it? asks Terence.
Listening, says Gaius. And there must be no sounds from you.
Or you, says Terence.
Or me, says Gaius. I want you to listen for the call of the forty spotted pardelote. It sounds like a squeaky swing. Or wheet-wheet. Or sleep-may-be.
Then what? asks Terence.
And if you hear it, come and silently tap me on the shoulder, says Gaius.
Terence nods. This is a good task. He can do it.
Saturday, November 23, 2019
Waiting For String
Arthur is now up a tree.
He is trying to set up the broadcasting device for Amanda.
The broadcasting device keeps on slipping.
What Arthur needs is some string.
You need string, says Jinjing, who is up the tree with him.
Yes, string, says Arthur. But I don't want to go down and climb all the way up again.
I'll go, says Jinjing.
Arthur waits in the forked branch of the white gum.
He is high in the eucalypt canopy.
Several birds have already flown by him. Some have landed, stared hard at Arthur, and left, without speaking.
It's boring, waiting for string.
He pulls his phone from his shorts pocket. No messages.
He wonders what Sweezus is doing.
Why not send him a message? And a selfie. Look at me. I'm up a tree, waiting for string.
He takes a selfie and sends the photo to Sweezus, with the message.
Probably won't get there.
And where is Jinjing with the string?
Bzzz. A message comes back almost at once. Arthur almost falls out of his tree.
It's from Sweezus.
What you need string 4? 40 spots, bro.
Arthur wonders why Sweezus would have said forty spots bro.
He looks again at his selfie.
It's him. But what's that small bird in the background, with a dull greenish brown back and head and no brow line, an olive rump and dull yellow undertail, a white chest with yellow tints, and black wings with ( maybe) forty white dots on the tips?
Of course the bird is not there now.
But Jinjing has returned with the string.
Thanks, says Arthur. He fixes the broadcasting device to the tree with the string.
He tests it, the way Amanda showed him, by turning it on.
It works. The call of the headache bird.
Sleep may be! Sleep may be! Sleep may be!
He is trying to set up the broadcasting device for Amanda.
The broadcasting device keeps on slipping.
What Arthur needs is some string.
You need string, says Jinjing, who is up the tree with him.
Yes, string, says Arthur. But I don't want to go down and climb all the way up again.
I'll go, says Jinjing.
Arthur waits in the forked branch of the white gum.
He is high in the eucalypt canopy.
Several birds have already flown by him. Some have landed, stared hard at Arthur, and left, without speaking.
It's boring, waiting for string.
He pulls his phone from his shorts pocket. No messages.
He wonders what Sweezus is doing.
Why not send him a message? And a selfie. Look at me. I'm up a tree, waiting for string.
He takes a selfie and sends the photo to Sweezus, with the message.
Probably won't get there.
And where is Jinjing with the string?
Bzzz. A message comes back almost at once. Arthur almost falls out of his tree.
It's from Sweezus.
What you need string 4? 40 spots, bro.
Arthur wonders why Sweezus would have said forty spots bro.
He looks again at his selfie.
It's him. But what's that small bird in the background, with a dull greenish brown back and head and no brow line, an olive rump and dull yellow undertail, a white chest with yellow tints, and black wings with ( maybe) forty white dots on the tips?
Of course the bird is not there now.
But Jinjing has returned with the string.
Thanks, says Arthur. He fixes the broadcasting device to the tree with the string.
He tests it, the way Amanda showed him, by turning it on.
It works. The call of the headache bird.
Sleep may be! Sleep may be! Sleep may be!
Friday, November 22, 2019
Synthetic Empathy
Someone else is having a late breakfast in the café.
She comes over.
Did I hear poetry? says she.
You might have, says Arthur. What did it sound like?
Poetry, says Amanda. I like poetry, but I'm not here for that. What are you here for?
Nothing much, says Arthur. And you?
I'm an endangered bird researcher, says Amanda. How long have you been here?
Just got here this morning, says Arthur. I'm an endangered bird researcher too.
Cool, says Amanda. Want to hook up? I've been let down by a colleague.
All right, says Arthur.
Whaaat? squawks Jinjing. You're supposed to be resting!
Cute toy parrot, says Amanda. Is it one of those ones from Hong Kong?
It's a drone robot, says Arthur. Got GPS, and synthetic empathy.
Fabulous, says Amanda. Wish I could afford one. All I've got is recording equipment for broadcast surveys and digital maps for transect point surveys.
We've brought some lerps, says Jinjing.
Lerps are not hard to find, says Amanda. Are you looking for any endangered bird in particular?
One called Spotty, says Jinjing.
Ah. The legendary Spotty, says Amanda. A forty spotted pardalote. That's what I'm looking for too.
What do you want us to do? asks Arthur.
Climb a white gum and set up the tape recording of the bird call, says Amanda. Then wait somewhere out of sight to see if you elicit a response.
What about you? asks Arthur.
Same, says Amanda. Two skilled observers improve the likelihood of detection.
Arthur realises it's now a bit late to ask what a forty spotted pardalote looks like.
He supposes that Jinjing will know.
He finishes his porridge and stands up, wincing.
Sore knee? asks Amanda. Will that be a problem?
No, says Arthur.
How'd you get it? asks Amanda.
Knife fight, says Arthur.
Seems a bit low on the body for that, says Amanda.
With a lobster, says Arthur.
Amanda assumes he is joking.
She comes over.
Did I hear poetry? says she.
You might have, says Arthur. What did it sound like?
Poetry, says Amanda. I like poetry, but I'm not here for that. What are you here for?
Nothing much, says Arthur. And you?
I'm an endangered bird researcher, says Amanda. How long have you been here?
Just got here this morning, says Arthur. I'm an endangered bird researcher too.
Cool, says Amanda. Want to hook up? I've been let down by a colleague.
All right, says Arthur.
Whaaat? squawks Jinjing. You're supposed to be resting!
Cute toy parrot, says Amanda. Is it one of those ones from Hong Kong?
It's a drone robot, says Arthur. Got GPS, and synthetic empathy.
Fabulous, says Amanda. Wish I could afford one. All I've got is recording equipment for broadcast surveys and digital maps for transect point surveys.
We've brought some lerps, says Jinjing.
Lerps are not hard to find, says Amanda. Are you looking for any endangered bird in particular?
One called Spotty, says Jinjing.
Ah. The legendary Spotty, says Amanda. A forty spotted pardalote. That's what I'm looking for too.
What do you want us to do? asks Arthur.
Climb a white gum and set up the tape recording of the bird call, says Amanda. Then wait somewhere out of sight to see if you elicit a response.
What about you? asks Arthur.
Same, says Amanda. Two skilled observers improve the likelihood of detection.
Arthur realises it's now a bit late to ask what a forty spotted pardalote looks like.
He supposes that Jinjing will know.
He finishes his porridge and stands up, wincing.
Sore knee? asks Amanda. Will that be a problem?
No, says Arthur.
How'd you get it? asks Amanda.
Knife fight, says Arthur.
Seems a bit low on the body for that, says Amanda.
With a lobster, says Arthur.
Amanda assumes he is joking.
Thursday, November 21, 2019
Truncated Time
Gaius is enjoying his roasted oats and brown rice porridge.
Arthur is not.
Arthur chews steadily. His knee tingles.
Am I number two now? asks Terence.
Number two? says Gaius.
I told Jerry I was, says Terence. Because Arthur's poisoned.
I see, says Gaius. Number two in the team.
YES! says Terence. Am I?
Arthur does not appear to be poisoned, says Gaius. But I suppose he should take things easy for the rest of today.
Arthur keeps chewing.
What do you think, Arthur? You potter about in this vicinity, and I'll go further afield.
With me, says Terence.
And your parrots, says Gaius. They will be number three.
I object, says P. krameri.
So do I, says Jinjing. I'm staying with Arthur.
I withdraw my objection, says P. krameri.
Some things work out with no bother.
Come then, says Gaius. Terence and P. krameri. On foot. I'll leave my bike here with you, Arthur.
Okay, says Arthur.
What will you do? asks Gaius.
I'll ask around, says Arthur. Someone here might have seen a spotted pardalote.
Good man, says Gaius.
Off they go.
Number one, Gaius, number two, Terence, and number three, P. krameri.
Arthur stops eating his porridge and leans back in his chair.
His poem is taking shape nicely.
He tries out a few lines on Jinjing.
The green and yellow bandage, stinking of fish
Manna ripped from forked branches, tasting of cheese
Red tailed birds fight over detritus...
Excellent, says Jinjing. Very modern. Like mine.
What's yours? asks Arthur.
Just a little thing I made up in Penguin, says Jinjing. It's quite long , but here's a sample:
I enter the dark region
Seeking the wrong bottle
Fumes overpower me
I drop it.
You drop it before you find it, says Arthur.
No, I find it, then I drop it, says Jinjing. I've truncated time.
Clever, says Arthur. So the hearer intuits.
Jinjing turns a deeper shade of red in his red parts, after this praise from Arthur.
(or does he? the reader intuits)
Arthur is not.
Arthur chews steadily. His knee tingles.
Am I number two now? asks Terence.
Number two? says Gaius.
I told Jerry I was, says Terence. Because Arthur's poisoned.
I see, says Gaius. Number two in the team.
YES! says Terence. Am I?
Arthur does not appear to be poisoned, says Gaius. But I suppose he should take things easy for the rest of today.
Arthur keeps chewing.
What do you think, Arthur? You potter about in this vicinity, and I'll go further afield.
With me, says Terence.
And your parrots, says Gaius. They will be number three.
I object, says P. krameri.
So do I, says Jinjing. I'm staying with Arthur.
I withdraw my objection, says P. krameri.
Some things work out with no bother.
Come then, says Gaius. Terence and P. krameri. On foot. I'll leave my bike here with you, Arthur.
Okay, says Arthur.
What will you do? asks Gaius.
I'll ask around, says Arthur. Someone here might have seen a spotted pardalote.
Good man, says Gaius.
Off they go.
Number one, Gaius, number two, Terence, and number three, P. krameri.
Arthur stops eating his porridge and leans back in his chair.
His poem is taking shape nicely.
He tries out a few lines on Jinjing.
The green and yellow bandage, stinking of fish
Manna ripped from forked branches, tasting of cheese
Red tailed birds fight over detritus...
Excellent, says Jinjing. Very modern. Like mine.
What's yours? asks Arthur.
Just a little thing I made up in Penguin, says Jinjing. It's quite long , but here's a sample:
I enter the dark region
Seeking the wrong bottle
Fumes overpower me
I drop it.
You drop it before you find it, says Arthur.
No, I find it, then I drop it, says Jinjing. I've truncated time.
Clever, says Arthur. So the hearer intuits.
Jinjing turns a deeper shade of red in his red parts, after this praise from Arthur.
(or does he? the reader intuits)
Wednesday, November 20, 2019
Ripped From Forked Branches
Jerry comes out of the Jetty Café, followed by Mum.
Guess what? says Terence. I'm number two now.
Jerry pinches his nostrils together.
I'm sure Terence doesn't mean that kind of number two, says Mum.
What kind? asks Terence.
Never mind, says Mum. Tell us what happened.
Arthur's poisoned, says Terence. Green stuff's coming out of his knee.
How alarming, says Mum.
She hurries over.
Arthur is sitting on the ground with his knee up. Dad is still dabbing. It is true that the stuff on the cotton ball is green.
Let me help, says Mum.
I'm just wetting the bandage to loosen it, says Dad. Then it should peel off easily.
It'll peel off easily right now, says Mum, leaning in and ripping off the bandage.
Ooh! says Dad. Rachel! That was harsh.
Yeow! says Arthur.
Still, he admires her for doing it. And all pain is inspiring.
Inspiring. He could write something now. Something with yellow and green bandages, waited on by red-tailed birds, sticky, like underworld manna, ripped from forked branches, tasting of cheese....
See, says Terence. Arthur is poisoned.
I don't think so, says Rachel. He just needs a clean bandage and some breakfast.
Good idea, says Gaius. I could do with some breakfast.
Try the café, says Rachel. They do roasted oats and brown rice porridge, or pan roasted Swiss Brown mushrooms on café toast with parsley and preserved lemon, or French toast with banana and bacon and Canadian maple syrup....
Porridge sounds good to me, says Gaius. Arthur, come in when you're ready. I'll order.
Arthur is too involved with his poem to realise that he is going to get porridge, when he would have preferred banana and bacon with maple syrup.
Dad puts on the new bandage. Tapes it.
Okay buddy? We have to go now. Keep it clean. I'll leave you to dispose of the rubbish
He, Rachel and Jerry get into their car and drive off. They have until the last ferry to do all of Bruny Island.
The Beautiful Firetails offer to get rid of the rubbish.
Arthur doesn't care where it goes.
Off they fly, with the fish bandage, the green cotton ball and the single use tweezers.
What treasures!
Guess what? says Terence. I'm number two now.
Jerry pinches his nostrils together.
I'm sure Terence doesn't mean that kind of number two, says Mum.
What kind? asks Terence.
Never mind, says Mum. Tell us what happened.
Arthur's poisoned, says Terence. Green stuff's coming out of his knee.
How alarming, says Mum.
She hurries over.
Arthur is sitting on the ground with his knee up. Dad is still dabbing. It is true that the stuff on the cotton ball is green.
Let me help, says Mum.
I'm just wetting the bandage to loosen it, says Dad. Then it should peel off easily.
It'll peel off easily right now, says Mum, leaning in and ripping off the bandage.
Ooh! says Dad. Rachel! That was harsh.
Yeow! says Arthur.
Still, he admires her for doing it. And all pain is inspiring.
Inspiring. He could write something now. Something with yellow and green bandages, waited on by red-tailed birds, sticky, like underworld manna, ripped from forked branches, tasting of cheese....
See, says Terence. Arthur is poisoned.
I don't think so, says Rachel. He just needs a clean bandage and some breakfast.
Good idea, says Gaius. I could do with some breakfast.
Try the café, says Rachel. They do roasted oats and brown rice porridge, or pan roasted Swiss Brown mushrooms on café toast with parsley and preserved lemon, or French toast with banana and bacon and Canadian maple syrup....
Porridge sounds good to me, says Gaius. Arthur, come in when you're ready. I'll order.
Arthur is too involved with his poem to realise that he is going to get porridge, when he would have preferred banana and bacon with maple syrup.
Dad puts on the new bandage. Tapes it.
Okay buddy? We have to go now. Keep it clean. I'll leave you to dispose of the rubbish
He, Rachel and Jerry get into their car and drive off. They have until the last ferry to do all of Bruny Island.
The Beautiful Firetails offer to get rid of the rubbish.
Arthur doesn't care where it goes.
Off they fly, with the fish bandage, the green cotton ball and the single use tweezers.
What treasures!
Tuesday, November 19, 2019
He Might Come Down For Manna
It seems all the local birds know Spotty.
He likes the high life, says the female Beautiful Firetail.
He flits around in the high eucalypt canopy, says the male.
White gums, says female.
Has he? asks Arthur.
Ha ha, laugh the birds.
Would he come down for lerps? asks Arthur.
Who wouldn't? says the female.
Have you got some? asks the male.
Yes, says Arthur. In this paper bag.
He pulls it out of his pocket. A steak knife falls out.
Steak knife, says Arthur.
Nice one, says the male Beautiful Firetail. Now let's see those lerps.
Arthur opens the bag.
The male sticks his beak in and sniffs deeply.
Tainted! says the male. Smell this! he invites the female.
She sniffs and recoils. Onions! Euw!
He won't eat those, says the female Beautiful Firetail. He might come down for manna.
Arthur makes a mental note. Manna.
Dad comes over with Gaius.
First aid kit, says Dad. Let's see that knee.
He opens the first aid kit. Takes out a sealed packet.
These are good, says Dad. Completely sterile.
He puts on rubber gloves. And tears open a packet of softening solution. And picks up a cotton ball with tweezers.
The Firetails eye the cotton ball.
Can we have that when you're finished?
No, says Dad. It might be infected.
Knee up, Arthur.
Arthur bends his knee up, balancing now on one leg.
Dad starts dabbing.
This could take a while, and already Arthur feels dizzy.
Maybe it IS infected.
He wouldn't mind that.
He likes the high life, says the female Beautiful Firetail.
He flits around in the high eucalypt canopy, says the male.
White gums, says female.
Has he? asks Arthur.
Ha ha, laugh the birds.
Would he come down for lerps? asks Arthur.
Who wouldn't? says the female.
Have you got some? asks the male.
Yes, says Arthur. In this paper bag.
He pulls it out of his pocket. A steak knife falls out.
Steak knife, says Arthur.
Nice one, says the male Beautiful Firetail. Now let's see those lerps.
Arthur opens the bag.
The male sticks his beak in and sniffs deeply.
Tainted! says the male. Smell this! he invites the female.
She sniffs and recoils. Onions! Euw!
He won't eat those, says the female Beautiful Firetail. He might come down for manna.
Arthur makes a mental note. Manna.
Dad comes over with Gaius.
First aid kit, says Dad. Let's see that knee.
He opens the first aid kit. Takes out a sealed packet.
These are good, says Dad. Completely sterile.
He puts on rubber gloves. And tears open a packet of softening solution. And picks up a cotton ball with tweezers.
The Firetails eye the cotton ball.
Can we have that when you're finished?
No, says Dad. It might be infected.
Knee up, Arthur.
Arthur bends his knee up, balancing now on one leg.
Dad starts dabbing.
This could take a while, and already Arthur feels dizzy.
Maybe it IS infected.
He wouldn't mind that.
Monday, November 18, 2019
Birds Of Least Concern
I see you have made the acquaintance of two Firetail Finches, says Gaius.
No, says Terence. These guys are called Beautifuls.
We can speak for ourselves, says the female. We prefer the name Beautiful Firetails.
Are you the one we seek? asks the male. The Striated Pardalote sent us.
Possibly, says Gaius. Or it may be Arthur. It depends what you think you've been offered.
Nothing specific, says the female Beautiful Firetail.
Perhaps you can help us find a forty spotted Pardalote, says Gaius. Do you know any?
Yes we do, says the male. We know one called Spotty.
The female suppresses a laugh.
They're lying, says Jinjing.
Interesting that they should do so, says Gaius.
You believe him? asks the female.
I do, says Gaius. He has an unerring nose for the truth.
Thank you, says Jinjing. And I have an unerring nose for when someone needs to change their bandage.
He is looking at Arthur.
Arthur looks down at his knee.
Go inside and soak off that bandage, says Jinjing.
It's okay, says Arthur.
I'll go in, says Gaius. I'll ask for a bowl of warm water.
He heads for the entrance to the café.
He meets Dad, coming out.
See you found your birds already, says Dad.
Those are not the birds we seek, says Gaius.
They look pretty colourful, says Dad. Red tail feathers. What are they?
Firetail Finches, says Gaius. They are resident birds, and considered LC.
LC? asks Dad, who is not a bird man.
Of Least Concern, says Gaius.
Bit insulting, says Dad. Anyway, let me give you a heads up. Don't ask for takeaway. The staff are mega grumpy.
Dear me, says Gaius. I was intending to ask for a bowl of warm water.
If I were you I wouldn't, says Dad.
Perhaps I'll get a cup of warm water from the toilets, says Gaius.
Not recommended, says Dad. And what for?
My colleague has a cut knee, and his bandage has stuck to the wound, says Gaius.
We have a first aid kit, says Dad. Bring your friend to the car. I'll fix him.
They walk over to where the Firetails are explaining to Arthur how they came to know Spotty.
No, says Terence. These guys are called Beautifuls.
We can speak for ourselves, says the female. We prefer the name Beautiful Firetails.
Are you the one we seek? asks the male. The Striated Pardalote sent us.
Possibly, says Gaius. Or it may be Arthur. It depends what you think you've been offered.
Nothing specific, says the female Beautiful Firetail.
Perhaps you can help us find a forty spotted Pardalote, says Gaius. Do you know any?
Yes we do, says the male. We know one called Spotty.
The female suppresses a laugh.
They're lying, says Jinjing.
Interesting that they should do so, says Gaius.
You believe him? asks the female.
I do, says Gaius. He has an unerring nose for the truth.
Thank you, says Jinjing. And I have an unerring nose for when someone needs to change their bandage.
He is looking at Arthur.
Arthur looks down at his knee.
Go inside and soak off that bandage, says Jinjing.
It's okay, says Arthur.
I'll go in, says Gaius. I'll ask for a bowl of warm water.
He heads for the entrance to the café.
He meets Dad, coming out.
See you found your birds already, says Dad.
Those are not the birds we seek, says Gaius.
They look pretty colourful, says Dad. Red tail feathers. What are they?
Firetail Finches, says Gaius. They are resident birds, and considered LC.
LC? asks Dad, who is not a bird man.
Of Least Concern, says Gaius.
Bit insulting, says Dad. Anyway, let me give you a heads up. Don't ask for takeaway. The staff are mega grumpy.
Dear me, says Gaius. I was intending to ask for a bowl of warm water.
If I were you I wouldn't, says Dad.
Perhaps I'll get a cup of warm water from the toilets, says Gaius.
Not recommended, says Dad. And what for?
My colleague has a cut knee, and his bandage has stuck to the wound, says Gaius.
We have a first aid kit, says Dad. Bring your friend to the car. I'll fix him.
They walk over to where the Firetails are explaining to Arthur how they came to know Spotty.
Sunday, November 17, 2019
Woop Has Two Meanings
Dad pulls up outside the Jetty Café.
Everyone gets out.
This looks nice, says Mum. Let's get a coffee.
They all go inside.
There's a queue at the counter.
I'll wait, says Dad. You go and look at the art work.
Thanks, says Mum. Coming Jerry. Coming Terence?
Can I have my knife back? asks Terence.
A few people turn, to see what kind of child has asked this question.
Not yet, says Mum, hastily.
She hurries Jerry and Terence away, to look at the artwork. Wooden objects. Paintings of water and bush.
This is boring, says Terence. I'm going outside to wait.
Don't go far off, says Mum. Stay with your parrot.
Jinjing is outside already, not having come in.
Why didn't you come in? asks Terence.
Bad vibes, says Jinjing. And I'm keeping a lookout for Arthur. I'm worried about him.
No one worries about Arthur, says Terence.
I do, says Jinjing.
Look! cries Terence. Two red parrots!
Those are not parrots, says Jinjing. Nor are they forty spotted pardalotes. Ignore them.
No, says Terence. I'm going to inspect them.
He stomps over to the shrub on which the not-parrots are balancing.
Hello, red parrots, says Terence.
Are you him? asks one of the not-parrots. You don't look important.
I am important, says Terence. See this claw?
It's broken, says the other one. And we're not red parrots. Don't you know anything?
What are you? asks Terence.
Beautiful Firetails, say the two not-parrots, together.
They turn on the branch to display their red rumps.
Wow. Says Terence. I mean Woop.
What's the difference? asks the female Beautiful Firetail.
Nothing, says Terence. But Woop has two meanings, and Wow doesn't.
So there is a difference, says the male Beautiful Firetail to the female.
Apparently so, says the female. Is there any point in going on with this? He is not who we seek.
I am! says Terence. Who do you seek?
An adult, a natural historian, a scientific person on a bicycle, says the female.
That's my leader, says Terence. He's coming. Stay here.
Now we're getting somewhere, says the female.
Jinjing flies over.
They're coming!
P. krameri lands first.
I see you have made contact with two Beautiful Firetails, says P. krameri. I'll take over from here.
We won't talk to parrots, says the female Firetail.
They only talk to grown ups, says Terence.
The two grown ups coast up the track on their bicycles and come to a halt at the shrub.
Jinjing looks with concern at Arthur's knee.
Everyone gets out.
This looks nice, says Mum. Let's get a coffee.
They all go inside.
There's a queue at the counter.
I'll wait, says Dad. You go and look at the art work.
Thanks, says Mum. Coming Jerry. Coming Terence?
Can I have my knife back? asks Terence.
A few people turn, to see what kind of child has asked this question.
Not yet, says Mum, hastily.
She hurries Jerry and Terence away, to look at the artwork. Wooden objects. Paintings of water and bush.
This is boring, says Terence. I'm going outside to wait.
Don't go far off, says Mum. Stay with your parrot.
Jinjing is outside already, not having come in.
Why didn't you come in? asks Terence.
Bad vibes, says Jinjing. And I'm keeping a lookout for Arthur. I'm worried about him.
No one worries about Arthur, says Terence.
I do, says Jinjing.
Look! cries Terence. Two red parrots!
Those are not parrots, says Jinjing. Nor are they forty spotted pardalotes. Ignore them.
No, says Terence. I'm going to inspect them.
He stomps over to the shrub on which the not-parrots are balancing.
Hello, red parrots, says Terence.
Are you him? asks one of the not-parrots. You don't look important.
I am important, says Terence. See this claw?
It's broken, says the other one. And we're not red parrots. Don't you know anything?
What are you? asks Terence.
Beautiful Firetails, say the two not-parrots, together.
They turn on the branch to display their red rumps.
Wow. Says Terence. I mean Woop.
What's the difference? asks the female Beautiful Firetail.
Nothing, says Terence. But Woop has two meanings, and Wow doesn't.
So there is a difference, says the male Beautiful Firetail to the female.
Apparently so, says the female. Is there any point in going on with this? He is not who we seek.
I am! says Terence. Who do you seek?
An adult, a natural historian, a scientific person on a bicycle, says the female.
That's my leader, says Terence. He's coming. Stay here.
Now we're getting somewhere, says the female.
Jinjing flies over.
They're coming!
P. krameri lands first.
I see you have made contact with two Beautiful Firetails, says P. krameri. I'll take over from here.
We won't talk to parrots, says the female Firetail.
They only talk to grown ups, says Terence.
The two grown ups coast up the track on their bicycles and come to a halt at the shrub.
Jinjing looks with concern at Arthur's knee.
Saturday, November 16, 2019
We Have A Singular Nature
Gaius and Arthur cycle towards the northernmost point of North Bruny Island.
P. krameri flies above them.
My view is better than theirs, thinks P. krameri. I can see the whole island.
trees bushes flat grasslands a road like a ribbon........
rugged cliff edges white empty beaches blue sea.......
I should fly lower, thinks P. krameri. Closer to the eucalypt canopy.
He drops altitude.
The trees are not buzzing with birds.
Where are they? wonders P. krameri. Not even a parrot.
He flies over Gaius and Arthur, low enough to shout:
Going forward!
Since you're flying low, calls Gaius, look out for clumps of erigeron.
Okay! squawks P. krameri.
Still got a toothache? asks Arthur.
No, says Gaius. Just a preventative measure. How's that knee?
Don't know. Can't get the bandage off, says Arthur.
It must be stuck on with dried fluids, says Gaius. We'll see about that when we get to the café.
It'll drop off eventually, says Arthur.
Your leg? asks Gaius. Only joking.
Looks like P. krameri's found something, says Arthur.
They ride up to where P. krameri has landed.
He is talking to a striated pardalote, who has come out from a cup shaped nest of bark and grass built in a hollow log, some metres away from the road.
Aha! says Gaius. A striated pardalote. These are quite common.
Thanks for that, says the striated pardalote. But I should like to point out that each and every one of us has a singular nature.
Of course, says Gaius. I'm not disputing that. But your species, while similar to the forty spotted pardalote, is not endangered.
Don't blame us, says the striated pardalote. Just because we're better at it.
You've got on the wrong side of her, says P. krameri.
I have, says Gaius. Arthur, you try.
Okay, says Arthur. He bends down. His knee bleeds through the bandage.
That smells nasty, says the striated pardalote.
It's the bandage, not the wound, says Arthur. But thanks for noticing. You're obviously very observant.
Very good, Arthur, says Gaius. I see where you're going.
Arthur keeps going.
And we were wondering if you knew where we might find a clump of erigeron. My friend has a toothache.
I know that cure, says the striated pardalote. It doesn't work, I can tell you. But if you want erigeron, I suggest you go back to the Neck.
Thanks, says Arthur. We'll be going back that way after we've finished our mission.
Which is? asks the striated pardalote.
To locate as many forty spotted pardalotes as we can, says Arthur.
What for? asks the striated pardalote.
To put them in cages and breed them, says Arthur.
No kidding? says the striated pardalote. Well, I might be able to help you.
Great, says Arthur. We're heading for the Jetty Café. If you see any, send them up there.
I might, says the striated pardalote. But it's up to them really. And I'd have to lie, wouldn't I.
Think about it, says Arthur. Even less competition.
He can see that that she's thinking about it.
She pops back into her cup shaped nest, to continue thinking.
Arthur, says Gaius. I can't approve of your methods.
Ends and means, says Arthur. It may not work anyway.
Thank you, says P. krameri.
What for? asks Gaius. Oh I see. You found her. Thank you P. krameri.
P. krameri flies above them.
My view is better than theirs, thinks P. krameri. I can see the whole island.
trees bushes flat grasslands a road like a ribbon........
rugged cliff edges white empty beaches blue sea.......
I should fly lower, thinks P. krameri. Closer to the eucalypt canopy.
He drops altitude.
The trees are not buzzing with birds.
Where are they? wonders P. krameri. Not even a parrot.
He flies over Gaius and Arthur, low enough to shout:
Going forward!
Since you're flying low, calls Gaius, look out for clumps of erigeron.
Okay! squawks P. krameri.
Still got a toothache? asks Arthur.
No, says Gaius. Just a preventative measure. How's that knee?
Don't know. Can't get the bandage off, says Arthur.
It must be stuck on with dried fluids, says Gaius. We'll see about that when we get to the café.
It'll drop off eventually, says Arthur.
Your leg? asks Gaius. Only joking.
Looks like P. krameri's found something, says Arthur.
They ride up to where P. krameri has landed.
He is talking to a striated pardalote, who has come out from a cup shaped nest of bark and grass built in a hollow log, some metres away from the road.
Aha! says Gaius. A striated pardalote. These are quite common.
Thanks for that, says the striated pardalote. But I should like to point out that each and every one of us has a singular nature.
Of course, says Gaius. I'm not disputing that. But your species, while similar to the forty spotted pardalote, is not endangered.
Don't blame us, says the striated pardalote. Just because we're better at it.
You've got on the wrong side of her, says P. krameri.
I have, says Gaius. Arthur, you try.
Okay, says Arthur. He bends down. His knee bleeds through the bandage.
That smells nasty, says the striated pardalote.
It's the bandage, not the wound, says Arthur. But thanks for noticing. You're obviously very observant.
Very good, Arthur, says Gaius. I see where you're going.
Arthur keeps going.
And we were wondering if you knew where we might find a clump of erigeron. My friend has a toothache.
I know that cure, says the striated pardalote. It doesn't work, I can tell you. But if you want erigeron, I suggest you go back to the Neck.
Thanks, says Arthur. We'll be going back that way after we've finished our mission.
Which is? asks the striated pardalote.
To locate as many forty spotted pardalotes as we can, says Arthur.
What for? asks the striated pardalote.
To put them in cages and breed them, says Arthur.
No kidding? says the striated pardalote. Well, I might be able to help you.
Great, says Arthur. We're heading for the Jetty Café. If you see any, send them up there.
I might, says the striated pardalote. But it's up to them really. And I'd have to lie, wouldn't I.
Think about it, says Arthur. Even less competition.
He can see that that she's thinking about it.
She pops back into her cup shaped nest, to continue thinking.
Arthur, says Gaius. I can't approve of your methods.
Ends and means, says Arthur. It may not work anyway.
Thank you, says P. krameri.
What for? asks Gaius. Oh I see. You found her. Thank you P. krameri.
Friday, November 15, 2019
False Promise
I'm not a loser, says Terence. I'm here to do science.
What sort of science? asks Jerry.
Ecological science? asks Dad. I heard your grandfather say he'd be bird spotting.
Where was he? asks Terence.
Back at the kiosk, says Dad. Wasn't he your grandpa?
No, says Terence. That was Gaius. He's our team leader.
And the young man who was with him, says Mum. Is he a scientist?
That's Arthur, says Terence. He's a poet.
How romantic, says Mum. What's he done to his knee?
He cut it, fighting, says Terence. We all had knives. Captain de Kermadec lost his claw.
Good heavens! says Mum. YOU had a knife fight?
Yes, says Terence. I've still got the knife. Want to see it?
I'll take it, says Mum. I won't have you sitting in the back of the car next to my Jerry with a knife. Hand it over.
Terence pulls the knife out of his pocket, and hands it to Mum.
Oh, it's a steak knife, says Mum. And look at the fancy handle.
Dad glances at the fancy handle, although he is driving.
Very nice, says Dad. Eighteenth century French.
Can I have it back when we get there? asks Terence.
I suppose so, says Mum.
Jerry looks at Terence with more respect than before.
He offers Terence another Spew Ball without saying Have a Spew Ball.
Terence accepts one. He holds it up, but doesn't eat it.
There are two diphthongs in this, says Terence.
That's very clever, says Mum. I suppose you mean the long vowels.
Terence hesitates.
Yes, says Jinjing. He does. I taught him that.
You're a smart parrot, says Mum. Where are you from?
Hong Kong, says Jinjing.
Oh dear, says Mum. You must be so sad. All the protests.
No, says Jinjing. We drone robots don't concern ourselves with protests.We just do our job.
What's your job? asks Jerry.
Way finding, song making, contact with birds at high levels, says Jinjing.
Stop boasting, says Terence.
If I look good, you look good, says Jinjing.
You both look good, says Dad. Or at least, interesting. Don't they Jerry?
Jerry sucks on a Spew Ball. It's sour. The sourness builds until pop, sticky liquid lime syrup fills his mouth.
But it doesn't spill out of his mouth like a river.
That was a false promise.
What sort of science? asks Jerry.
Ecological science? asks Dad. I heard your grandfather say he'd be bird spotting.
Where was he? asks Terence.
Back at the kiosk, says Dad. Wasn't he your grandpa?
No, says Terence. That was Gaius. He's our team leader.
And the young man who was with him, says Mum. Is he a scientist?
That's Arthur, says Terence. He's a poet.
How romantic, says Mum. What's he done to his knee?
He cut it, fighting, says Terence. We all had knives. Captain de Kermadec lost his claw.
Good heavens! says Mum. YOU had a knife fight?
Yes, says Terence. I've still got the knife. Want to see it?
I'll take it, says Mum. I won't have you sitting in the back of the car next to my Jerry with a knife. Hand it over.
Terence pulls the knife out of his pocket, and hands it to Mum.
Oh, it's a steak knife, says Mum. And look at the fancy handle.
Dad glances at the fancy handle, although he is driving.
Very nice, says Dad. Eighteenth century French.
Can I have it back when we get there? asks Terence.
I suppose so, says Mum.
Jerry looks at Terence with more respect than before.
He offers Terence another Spew Ball without saying Have a Spew Ball.
Terence accepts one. He holds it up, but doesn't eat it.
There are two diphthongs in this, says Terence.
That's very clever, says Mum. I suppose you mean the long vowels.
Terence hesitates.
Yes, says Jinjing. He does. I taught him that.
You're a smart parrot, says Mum. Where are you from?
Hong Kong, says Jinjing.
Oh dear, says Mum. You must be so sad. All the protests.
No, says Jinjing. We drone robots don't concern ourselves with protests.We just do our job.
What's your job? asks Jerry.
Way finding, song making, contact with birds at high levels, says Jinjing.
Stop boasting, says Terence.
If I look good, you look good, says Jinjing.
You both look good, says Dad. Or at least, interesting. Don't they Jerry?
Jerry sucks on a Spew Ball. It's sour. The sourness builds until pop, sticky liquid lime syrup fills his mouth.
But it doesn't spill out of his mouth like a river.
That was a false promise.
Thursday, November 14, 2019
A Bumpy Ride With Strangers
Katherine has left, for the Cheese Co.
Now Gaius perceives a slight problem.
Hum, says Gaius.
What is it? asks Arthur.
Two bicycles, says Gaius. No basket on either. How will we transport Terence?
And my luggage! says Terence.
What luggage? asks Gaius.
Terence indicates his two packets of Spew Balls, his steak knife and Jinjing.
That's one thing we won't need to worry about, says Gaius. Jinjing can fly. I suppose I could squeeze you into my back pack.
What else is in there? asks Terence.
Notebooks, spare underwear, a few apple cores, says Gaius. It could do with a clear out.
I might go in Arthur's, says Terence.
I've got the lerps, says Arthur.
It'll have to be mine, says Gaius, unloading his back pack.
But then......
Problems? asks Dad.
It's the dad from the kiosk. The dad of the kid who got the third to last packet of Spew Balls.
Not really, says Gaius.
Looks like you've got space problems, says Dad. Which way are you heading?
To Dennes Hill, says Gaius. Bird spotting.
We're going that way, says Dad. Meant to be great views from the Jetty Café. Your kid can get a lift with us, if you want. My kid would love it.
What do you think, Terence? asks Gaius.
Can I bring Jinjing? asks Terence.
What a good idea, says Gaius.
But I'm meant to be flying, says Jinjing.
Change of plan, says Gaius. Save your energy for when we get there.
So Jinjing gets into Dad's car with Terence.
Meet you at the Jetty Café, says Dad. Take your time. The road's not sealed all the way.
What a nice fellow, says Gaius. But I feel happier that Jinjing's going with them. One shouldn't entrust one's charge entirely to strangers.
I guess not, says Arthur.
Gaius repacks his back pack except for the apple cores.
Arthur checks the state of his lerps.
They smell a bit like last night's dinner.
He and Gaius set off, cycling, with P. krameri flying above them.
P. krameri likes this situation.
Meanwhile Terence is being introduced to Dad's wife and the kid with the third pack of Spew Balls.
Dad's wife is called Mum, and the kid is called Jerry.
Have a Spew Ball, says Jerry.
I've got my own, says Terence.
Ha ha, laughs Jerry. I got to be the one who said it.
I could have said it, says Terence. Have a Spew Ball.
Loser, says Jerry.
Now Gaius perceives a slight problem.
Hum, says Gaius.
What is it? asks Arthur.
Two bicycles, says Gaius. No basket on either. How will we transport Terence?
And my luggage! says Terence.
What luggage? asks Gaius.
Terence indicates his two packets of Spew Balls, his steak knife and Jinjing.
That's one thing we won't need to worry about, says Gaius. Jinjing can fly. I suppose I could squeeze you into my back pack.
What else is in there? asks Terence.
Notebooks, spare underwear, a few apple cores, says Gaius. It could do with a clear out.
I might go in Arthur's, says Terence.
I've got the lerps, says Arthur.
It'll have to be mine, says Gaius, unloading his back pack.
But then......
Problems? asks Dad.
It's the dad from the kiosk. The dad of the kid who got the third to last packet of Spew Balls.
Not really, says Gaius.
Looks like you've got space problems, says Dad. Which way are you heading?
To Dennes Hill, says Gaius. Bird spotting.
We're going that way, says Dad. Meant to be great views from the Jetty Café. Your kid can get a lift with us, if you want. My kid would love it.
What do you think, Terence? asks Gaius.
Can I bring Jinjing? asks Terence.
What a good idea, says Gaius.
But I'm meant to be flying, says Jinjing.
Change of plan, says Gaius. Save your energy for when we get there.
So Jinjing gets into Dad's car with Terence.
Meet you at the Jetty Café, says Dad. Take your time. The road's not sealed all the way.
What a nice fellow, says Gaius. But I feel happier that Jinjing's going with them. One shouldn't entrust one's charge entirely to strangers.
I guess not, says Arthur.
Gaius repacks his back pack except for the apple cores.
Arthur checks the state of his lerps.
They smell a bit like last night's dinner.
He and Gaius set off, cycling, with P. krameri flying above them.
P. krameri likes this situation.
Meanwhile Terence is being introduced to Dad's wife and the kid with the third pack of Spew Balls.
Dad's wife is called Mum, and the kid is called Jerry.
Have a Spew Ball, says Jerry.
I've got my own, says Terence.
Ha ha, laughs Jerry. I got to be the one who said it.
I could have said it, says Terence. Have a Spew Ball.
Loser, says Jerry.
Wednesday, November 13, 2019
Frothing Rivers Of Green
Terence now has two packets of Spew Balls.
Who wants a Spew Ball? asks Terence.
But it seems no one wants one.
What are they? asks Katherine. Let me see.
Lime flavoured liquid filled chews, she says, reading the packet.
Do you want one now? asks Terence.
I prefer good old peppermints, says Katherine. Why don't you keep the Spew Balls for yourself.
What colour are they? asks Terence.
Green, I imagine, says Gaius. See the picture on the packet?
On the packet, a cartoon creature spews out frothing rivers of green.
I'll try one, says P. krameri.
Okay, says Terence, opening the packet. Here you are.
P. krameri tries one.
Erckh! They're those really SOUR ones!
Ha ha! laughs Terence.
You try one, says P. krameri.
No way, says Terence. I only want them so I can say Have a Spew Ball.
Then they will last a long time, says Gaius. Now, are we ready for departure?
Yes, says Katherine. I'm driving south to the Bruny Island Cheese Co. It's not far. Then I'll head back to the mainland, and make my way back to Margaret at Rocky Cape.
We're heading north, to the Dennes Hill Nature Reserve, says Gaius. Wish us luck spotting a forty spotted pardalote.
Good luck, says Katherine. Don't forget, we're meeting up again in Launceston.
ARE we? asks Gaius.
He must have forgotten.
Margaret is keen to, says Katherine. It will be nice.
Indeed, says Gaius.
I'll SMS you, says Katherine.
Wonderful, says Gaius.
Goodbye then, says Katherine. Goodbye Arthur, goodbye Jinjing, goodbye P. krameri and goodbye Terence. I shall miss you. You've learned such a lot while travelling with Margaret and me.
What? asks Terence.
You know, says Katherine. The alphabet. What Tasmanian Devils eat. How to do mazes.
Yes, says Terence. All those things. And how to steer by the stars.
You'll be an asset, says Arthur.
What's an ass-it ? Terence thinks he may have been insulted.
Who wants a Spew Ball? asks Terence.
But it seems no one wants one.
What are they? asks Katherine. Let me see.
Lime flavoured liquid filled chews, she says, reading the packet.
Do you want one now? asks Terence.
I prefer good old peppermints, says Katherine. Why don't you keep the Spew Balls for yourself.
What colour are they? asks Terence.
Green, I imagine, says Gaius. See the picture on the packet?
On the packet, a cartoon creature spews out frothing rivers of green.
I'll try one, says P. krameri.
Okay, says Terence, opening the packet. Here you are.
P. krameri tries one.
Erckh! They're those really SOUR ones!
Ha ha! laughs Terence.
You try one, says P. krameri.
No way, says Terence. I only want them so I can say Have a Spew Ball.
Then they will last a long time, says Gaius. Now, are we ready for departure?
Yes, says Katherine. I'm driving south to the Bruny Island Cheese Co. It's not far. Then I'll head back to the mainland, and make my way back to Margaret at Rocky Cape.
We're heading north, to the Dennes Hill Nature Reserve, says Gaius. Wish us luck spotting a forty spotted pardalote.
Good luck, says Katherine. Don't forget, we're meeting up again in Launceston.
ARE we? asks Gaius.
He must have forgotten.
Margaret is keen to, says Katherine. It will be nice.
Indeed, says Gaius.
I'll SMS you, says Katherine.
Wonderful, says Gaius.
Goodbye then, says Katherine. Goodbye Arthur, goodbye Jinjing, goodbye P. krameri and goodbye Terence. I shall miss you. You've learned such a lot while travelling with Margaret and me.
What? asks Terence.
You know, says Katherine. The alphabet. What Tasmanian Devils eat. How to do mazes.
Yes, says Terence. All those things. And how to steer by the stars.
You'll be an asset, says Arthur.
What's an ass-it ? Terence thinks he may have been insulted.
Tuesday, November 12, 2019
Hands Off My Spew Balls!
Car park, ferry landing, Bruny Island.
Guess what? says Terence. I had an adventure.
So did I, says P. krameri. The dinghy drifted off.
Why aren't you in it? asks Terence.
I'm different from you, says P. krameri.
Yes, says Terence. I'd still be in it. Where would I be?
Out there, says Gaius, pointing at the dinghy, which is still visible, although tiny.
So I did the right thing, says Terence. Want to hear my adventure?
Yes, says Katherine. But where is Jinjing?
Coming, says Arthur.
He got locked up and I didn't, says Terence. This is what happened. We climbed up to the kiosk in the dark and we looked through the front window and Jinjing said there's someone inside maybe they know when the ferry's arriving so we went in...
You went in? says Katherine. How?
Through a hole, says Terence.
What sort of hole? asks Gaius.
Just a hole, says Terence. And when we were inside Jinjing said Look, Spew Balls. That's two diphthongs. Sp-y-ou and b-aa-lls. And I said Did I ask you about diphthongs? and he said No, I just thought you'd like to know and I said I wouldn't, and then the man came out and said WHO ARE YOU?
This is exciting, says Gaius.
It was, says Terence. The man seized me and said HANDS OFF MY SPEW BALLS! and Jinjing said NOT HIM! I'm the ringleader! And the man said Okay I'm going to lock you up in the back room until the rush is over, and this boy can help me serve in the kiosk and after that you can go and we'll forget it.
Sounds reasonable enough, says Gaius. And that was good of Jinjing.
It was good of ME, says Terence. I served in the kiosk. And I was going to ask the man if I could have a packet of Spew Balls but every kid wanted Spew Balls and they were nearly all gone, and I said NO MORE SPEW BALLS but I got into trouble for saying it.
I see, says Gaius. I don't suppose you could go back, Arthur, and see if there are any packets of these so-called Spew Balls remaining?
No need, says Arthur, producing a packet from his shorts pocket.
Spew Balls. Hooray!
And now here comes Jinjing with a packet of something swinging from his beak.
He drops it.
More Spew Balls!
The man gave me these, says Jinjing.
This could be Terence's best day ever.
Guess what? says Terence. I had an adventure.
So did I, says P. krameri. The dinghy drifted off.
Why aren't you in it? asks Terence.
I'm different from you, says P. krameri.
Yes, says Terence. I'd still be in it. Where would I be?
Out there, says Gaius, pointing at the dinghy, which is still visible, although tiny.
So I did the right thing, says Terence. Want to hear my adventure?
Yes, says Katherine. But where is Jinjing?
Coming, says Arthur.
He got locked up and I didn't, says Terence. This is what happened. We climbed up to the kiosk in the dark and we looked through the front window and Jinjing said there's someone inside maybe they know when the ferry's arriving so we went in...
You went in? says Katherine. How?
Through a hole, says Terence.
What sort of hole? asks Gaius.
Just a hole, says Terence. And when we were inside Jinjing said Look, Spew Balls. That's two diphthongs. Sp-y-ou and b-aa-lls. And I said Did I ask you about diphthongs? and he said No, I just thought you'd like to know and I said I wouldn't, and then the man came out and said WHO ARE YOU?
This is exciting, says Gaius.
It was, says Terence. The man seized me and said HANDS OFF MY SPEW BALLS! and Jinjing said NOT HIM! I'm the ringleader! And the man said Okay I'm going to lock you up in the back room until the rush is over, and this boy can help me serve in the kiosk and after that you can go and we'll forget it.
Sounds reasonable enough, says Gaius. And that was good of Jinjing.
It was good of ME, says Terence. I served in the kiosk. And I was going to ask the man if I could have a packet of Spew Balls but every kid wanted Spew Balls and they were nearly all gone, and I said NO MORE SPEW BALLS but I got into trouble for saying it.
I see, says Gaius. I don't suppose you could go back, Arthur, and see if there are any packets of these so-called Spew Balls remaining?
No need, says Arthur, producing a packet from his shorts pocket.
Spew Balls. Hooray!
And now here comes Jinjing with a packet of something swinging from his beak.
He drops it.
More Spew Balls!
The man gave me these, says Jinjing.
This could be Terence's best day ever.
Monday, November 11, 2019
Helping Or What?
The ferry docks at Roberts Point, Bruny Island.
The passengers drive off.
Or wheel their bicycles off.
Or fly off, if you count P. krameri, who wasn't a passenger.
Katherine stops in the car park. Gets out of her car, looks back at the mainland.
Lovely view!
Gaius and Arthur wheel their bicycles over to where she is standing.
I won't leave for my cheese tour until we've found Terence, says Katherine.
P. krameri will know where he is, says Gaius. Or at least the direction he and Jinjing went off in.
They've gone off? says Katherine.
They won't have gone far, says Gaius.
P. krameri is perched on the roof of Katherine's car.
They were heading towards the kiosk, says P. krameri.
I'll go, says Arthur. Look after the lerps.
Gladly, says P. krameri. I'll take the opportunity to sniff them.
What for? asks Arthur.
Never mind, says P. krameri. I wish I hadn't said it.
Okay, says Arthur. Anyone want anything from the kiosk?
Not me, says Gaius.
Arthur goes up to the kiosk.
He goes inside. He is not the first person to enter.
Several families are crowding in front of the counter.
Taking their time choosing snacks, drinks and lollies.
Arthur hears Terence's voice, rising.
No more Spew Balls!
But we can SEE the Spew Balls! says a child.
But you can't buy them, says Terence. Have some Snot Balls instead.
Dad! says the child. I don't want the Snot Balls.
Not much I can do, says Dad. This young man is in charge here. But he does seem a bit young to have so much responsibility.
What's going on? asks a man coming out from the back of the kiosk.
My daughter wants Spew Balls, says Dad, but this young fellow won't sell them.
I apologise, says the man. There appear to be plenty of Spew Balls. How many would you like?
One packet, says Dad.
He pays for the Spew Balls.
Thank you.
One happy family moves out.
Now what? says Terence. Am I still helping or what?
No, says the man. You can go now.
Not until you release my parrot, says Terence.
Arthur moves forward.
He's with me. Where's the parrot?
They broke into my kiosk early this morning, says the man. I locked up the parrot.
It's not a real parrot, says Arthur. It's our drone robot. We're a scientific wildlife research team.
With a parrot drone robot? says the man. What does he do?
He's our spotter, and he goes where no humans can go, says Arthur.
Does he? asks Terence.
If we ask him, says Arthur.
Well, I suppose I can release him to you, says the man. Just tell him, no more break-ins.
Sure, says Arthur. Release him. Come on, Terence, let's go.
Arthur turns and walks out of the kiosk, followed by Terence.
Jinjing remains locked up a bit longer.
Because the man needs to serve in his kiosk.
And he's just lost his helper.
The passengers drive off.
Or wheel their bicycles off.
Or fly off, if you count P. krameri, who wasn't a passenger.
Katherine stops in the car park. Gets out of her car, looks back at the mainland.
Lovely view!
Gaius and Arthur wheel their bicycles over to where she is standing.
I won't leave for my cheese tour until we've found Terence, says Katherine.
P. krameri will know where he is, says Gaius. Or at least the direction he and Jinjing went off in.
They've gone off? says Katherine.
They won't have gone far, says Gaius.
P. krameri is perched on the roof of Katherine's car.
They were heading towards the kiosk, says P. krameri.
I'll go, says Arthur. Look after the lerps.
Gladly, says P. krameri. I'll take the opportunity to sniff them.
What for? asks Arthur.
Never mind, says P. krameri. I wish I hadn't said it.
Okay, says Arthur. Anyone want anything from the kiosk?
Not me, says Gaius.
Arthur goes up to the kiosk.
He goes inside. He is not the first person to enter.
Several families are crowding in front of the counter.
Taking their time choosing snacks, drinks and lollies.
Arthur hears Terence's voice, rising.
No more Spew Balls!
But we can SEE the Spew Balls! says a child.
But you can't buy them, says Terence. Have some Snot Balls instead.
Dad! says the child. I don't want the Snot Balls.
Not much I can do, says Dad. This young man is in charge here. But he does seem a bit young to have so much responsibility.
What's going on? asks a man coming out from the back of the kiosk.
My daughter wants Spew Balls, says Dad, but this young fellow won't sell them.
I apologise, says the man. There appear to be plenty of Spew Balls. How many would you like?
One packet, says Dad.
He pays for the Spew Balls.
Thank you.
One happy family moves out.
Now what? says Terence. Am I still helping or what?
No, says the man. You can go now.
Not until you release my parrot, says Terence.
Arthur moves forward.
He's with me. Where's the parrot?
They broke into my kiosk early this morning, says the man. I locked up the parrot.
It's not a real parrot, says Arthur. It's our drone robot. We're a scientific wildlife research team.
With a parrot drone robot? says the man. What does he do?
He's our spotter, and he goes where no humans can go, says Arthur.
Does he? asks Terence.
If we ask him, says Arthur.
Well, I suppose I can release him to you, says the man. Just tell him, no more break-ins.
Sure, says Arthur. Release him. Come on, Terence, let's go.
Arthur turns and walks out of the kiosk, followed by Terence.
Jinjing remains locked up a bit longer.
Because the man needs to serve in his kiosk.
And he's just lost his helper.
Sunday, November 10, 2019
Star Influence
Now the dinghy is floating, with P. krameri on board.
Of course he has noticed.
But now he has a dilemma.
(and a question).
The dilemma: Remain with the dinghy or exit?
The question: Did the stars hear his poem, and misunderstand?
He floats in and out with the waves, pondering these issues.
If he stood up and looked out to sea he would see the first ferry of the morning, approaching.
But he does not, until he hears a loud hooting.
It is not permitted to be in the way of the ferry.
Hoot! Hoot!
Now he stands up and pays attention.
The ferry draws nearer. P. krameri flies up.
He lands on the deck near a family who are trying to make out if there is a kiosk at the ferry landing on Bruny Island.
There is!
P. krameri hops along the railing looking for someone he knows.
He spots Gaius.
Gaius!
Ah! P. krameri. Did you find Terence? Is he on Bruny?
Yes, says P. krameri, He and Jinjing went exploring. I remained with the dinghy. I thought it was right.
Is that it? asks Gaius, pointing at the dinghy.
Yes, says P. krameri. I was forced to exit the dinghy, just now.
Very wise, says Gaius. But what will happen to the dinghy?
My question too, says P. krameri. Tell me, do you think the stars have an influence?
It's not unlikely, says Gaius. Why do you ask?
And do you think they might listen to an entreaty?
I do not, says Gaius. Why, did you entreat them?
Not exactly, says P. krameri. I was idly improving on Terence's poem.
Not difficult, I'm sure, says Gaius. What was the subject?
Basically, show him the way, he deserves it, says P. krameri.
And of course they didn't, says Gaius. But he landed on Bruny Island anyway.
So you don't think it's my fault the dinghy is adrift with no one in it? asks P. krameri.
No, says Gaius. Someone will no doubt lasso it, and bring it to shore.
Phew! says P. krameri.
It's very pleasing to see that you are such an ethical thinker, says Gaius.
Thanks, says P. krameri. By the way, did you remember to bring my lerps?
Arthur has them in the paper bag in which Katherine carried his burgers, says Gaius.
Won't they smell of meat and onions? thinks P. krameri.
But he does not ask it.
He has asked enough questions today.
Of course he has noticed.
But now he has a dilemma.
(and a question).
The dilemma: Remain with the dinghy or exit?
The question: Did the stars hear his poem, and misunderstand?
He floats in and out with the waves, pondering these issues.
If he stood up and looked out to sea he would see the first ferry of the morning, approaching.
But he does not, until he hears a loud hooting.
It is not permitted to be in the way of the ferry.
Hoot! Hoot!
Now he stands up and pays attention.
The ferry draws nearer. P. krameri flies up.
He lands on the deck near a family who are trying to make out if there is a kiosk at the ferry landing on Bruny Island.
There is!
P. krameri hops along the railing looking for someone he knows.
He spots Gaius.
Gaius!
Ah! P. krameri. Did you find Terence? Is he on Bruny?
Yes, says P. krameri, He and Jinjing went exploring. I remained with the dinghy. I thought it was right.
Is that it? asks Gaius, pointing at the dinghy.
Yes, says P. krameri. I was forced to exit the dinghy, just now.
Very wise, says Gaius. But what will happen to the dinghy?
My question too, says P. krameri. Tell me, do you think the stars have an influence?
It's not unlikely, says Gaius. Why do you ask?
And do you think they might listen to an entreaty?
I do not, says Gaius. Why, did you entreat them?
Not exactly, says P. krameri. I was idly improving on Terence's poem.
Not difficult, I'm sure, says Gaius. What was the subject?
Basically, show him the way, he deserves it, says P. krameri.
And of course they didn't, says Gaius. But he landed on Bruny Island anyway.
So you don't think it's my fault the dinghy is adrift with no one in it? asks P. krameri.
No, says Gaius. Someone will no doubt lasso it, and bring it to shore.
Phew! says P. krameri.
It's very pleasing to see that you are such an ethical thinker, says Gaius.
Thanks, says P. krameri. By the way, did you remember to bring my lerps?
Arthur has them in the paper bag in which Katherine carried his burgers, says Gaius.
Won't they smell of meat and onions? thinks P. krameri.
But he does not ask it.
He has asked enough questions today.
Saturday, November 9, 2019
Arrival And Shwooosh
That was a good trip, says Terence. When is it morning?
Soon, says Jinjing.
The ferry starts operating at six thirty, says P. krameri. Katherine will be here by seven.
And Arthur, says Jinjing.
And Gaius, says Terence. But I was the first one to get here.
Thanks to your star hum, says Jinjing.
Thanks to him stealing a dinghy, says P. krameri.
And my poem, says Terence.
It was short, for a poem, says Jinjing.
Four lines, says P. krameri. Did you repeat it?
No, says Terence. I just said it once.
It wasn't even finished, says Jinjing.
That's because I got here, says Terence. Let's go exploring.
We shouldn't go far off, says P. krameri.
You wait here and I'll go exploring with Jinging, says Terence.
Okay, says P. krameri. I'll wait in the dinghy.
Drag it up the beach a bit first, says Jinjing. We don't want it floating off again.
Help me to do it, says P. krameri.
They try. But it's harder than if it was still in the water.
Tie it to something, says Terence.
With the rope, says Jinjing.
It's too short, says P. krameri. Terence cut it.
Come with us then, says Jinjing. We'll keep coming back to check on it.
No, I'll stay here, says P. krameri.
Terence and Jinjing head along the beach to the ferry landing.
It looms in the darkness. Water clanks at the sides.
They plod up a track alongside it.
Look! A kiosk! With a dim light on.
And someone is moving inside.
.......
P. krameri lies in the dinghy, looking up at the stars.
He thinks about Terence's poem.
Show me the way, I deserve it.
How rude. Why should Terence think he's entitled?
What would I ask the stars if I were in his position?
Something in my own language, entreating.....
Je vous en prie, mes etoiles.
Montrez moi la voie.
Je suis desolé, desolé
Je perds la foi.
Yes, that's good.
Shwooooosh, a large wave advances.
The dinghy lifts up off the sand......
Soon, says Jinjing.
The ferry starts operating at six thirty, says P. krameri. Katherine will be here by seven.
And Arthur, says Jinjing.
And Gaius, says Terence. But I was the first one to get here.
Thanks to your star hum, says Jinjing.
Thanks to him stealing a dinghy, says P. krameri.
And my poem, says Terence.
It was short, for a poem, says Jinjing.
Four lines, says P. krameri. Did you repeat it?
No, says Terence. I just said it once.
It wasn't even finished, says Jinjing.
That's because I got here, says Terence. Let's go exploring.
We shouldn't go far off, says P. krameri.
You wait here and I'll go exploring with Jinging, says Terence.
Okay, says P. krameri. I'll wait in the dinghy.
Drag it up the beach a bit first, says Jinjing. We don't want it floating off again.
Help me to do it, says P. krameri.
They try. But it's harder than if it was still in the water.
Tie it to something, says Terence.
With the rope, says Jinjing.
It's too short, says P. krameri. Terence cut it.
Come with us then, says Jinjing. We'll keep coming back to check on it.
No, I'll stay here, says P. krameri.
Terence and Jinjing head along the beach to the ferry landing.
It looms in the darkness. Water clanks at the sides.
They plod up a track alongside it.
Look! A kiosk! With a dim light on.
And someone is moving inside.
.......
P. krameri lies in the dinghy, looking up at the stars.
He thinks about Terence's poem.
Show me the way, I deserve it.
How rude. Why should Terence think he's entitled?
What would I ask the stars if I were in his position?
Something in my own language, entreating.....
Je vous en prie, mes etoiles.
Montrez moi la voie.
Je suis desolé, desolé
Je perds la foi.
Yes, that's good.
Shwooooosh, a large wave advances.
The dinghy lifts up off the sand......
Friday, November 8, 2019
Forget Science
This time, they spot the dinghy.
It's heading towards North Bruny, with Terence inside.
He is lying down, looking upwards.
They alight, on opposite sides.
About time, says Terence. I've nearly arrived on my own.
No you haven't says P. krameri. You're way out.
I was steering by the stars, says Terence.
Were you really steering? asks Jinjing. How were you doing it?
By humming, says Terence. A star hum.
As if that would do anything, says P. krameri.
I'm here aren't I? says Terence.
Yes, says Jinjing. But drifting.
That's because you stopped me, says Terence.
Hum again then, says P. krameri. If you think it helps. Meanwhile Jinjing has a GPS function. Did you know that?
I know P and S, says Terence. GPS must be a diphthong.
Is it? asks P. krameri.
Of course not, says Jinjing. It's just that Terence learned his alphabet and I learned the diphthongs.
When was this? asks P. krameri.
The dinghy catches a wave. Woosh! Perhaps they are nearing North Bruny.
In Katherine's car, on the way here, says Jinjing. We also did mazes. And maths.
P. krameri doesn't like the way this is going. Too intellectual.
Hum, says P. krameri.
Terence hums his star hum.
Hmmmmmm......mm......mmm......
It even has words, says Terence.
Those are not words, says P.krameri.
That wasn't them, says Terence.
Do the words, says Jinjing. It's sure to be helpful.
O right, says P. krameri, Do the words by all means. Forget GPS. Forget science.
Terence lies flat in the dinghy, looking up at the stars.
Hello it's me, stars,
Show me the way.
I deserve it.
That's it so far.
Is that it? asks Jinjing.
So far, says Terence.
Woooosh! Another wave catches the dinghy.
Crunch-shurrrr, the dinghy runs aground on the sand not too far from the ferry landing.
Thank you, stars.
It's heading towards North Bruny, with Terence inside.
He is lying down, looking upwards.
They alight, on opposite sides.
About time, says Terence. I've nearly arrived on my own.
No you haven't says P. krameri. You're way out.
I was steering by the stars, says Terence.
Were you really steering? asks Jinjing. How were you doing it?
By humming, says Terence. A star hum.
As if that would do anything, says P. krameri.
I'm here aren't I? says Terence.
Yes, says Jinjing. But drifting.
That's because you stopped me, says Terence.
Hum again then, says P. krameri. If you think it helps. Meanwhile Jinjing has a GPS function. Did you know that?
I know P and S, says Terence. GPS must be a diphthong.
Is it? asks P. krameri.
Of course not, says Jinjing. It's just that Terence learned his alphabet and I learned the diphthongs.
When was this? asks P. krameri.
The dinghy catches a wave. Woosh! Perhaps they are nearing North Bruny.
In Katherine's car, on the way here, says Jinjing. We also did mazes. And maths.
P. krameri doesn't like the way this is going. Too intellectual.
Hum, says P. krameri.
Terence hums his star hum.
Hmmmmmm......mm......mmm......
It even has words, says Terence.
Those are not words, says P.krameri.
That wasn't them, says Terence.
Do the words, says Jinjing. It's sure to be helpful.
O right, says P. krameri, Do the words by all means. Forget GPS. Forget science.
Terence lies flat in the dinghy, looking up at the stars.
Hello it's me, stars,
Show me the way.
I deserve it.
That's it so far.
Is that it? asks Jinjing.
So far, says Terence.
Woooosh! Another wave catches the dinghy.
Crunch-shurrrr, the dinghy runs aground on the sand not too far from the ferry landing.
Thank you, stars.
Thursday, November 7, 2019
Rolling Like Animals
Katherine pops her head through the hatch.
Jinjing! Come down here, Arthur wants you.
Jinjing brightens, and flies along the pontoon across the deck of the Recherche and down to where Arthur is eating his second burger.
Not angry? asks Jinjing.
No, says Arthur.
I would waste away if you were angry, says Jinjing. How is your knee?
Knee? says Arthur. Okay.
He raises his knee, with it's fish-smelling bandage.
That will go nasty, says Jinjing.
Which could be an advantage, says Arthur.
Oh? says Jinjing. Well anyway, I'm sorry.
No need to be sorry, says Arthur. Just answer this. Are you a drone robot?
I haven't looked at my program, says Jinjing.
I think you are, says Arthur. And so you're the best one for the job.
What's the job? asks Jinjing.
GPS, says Arthur. Follow Terence in the dinghy. If he drifts too far off course, drop down and tell him.
That will upset him, says Jinjing.
Better he knows, says Arthur.
......
Jinjing flies off in the darkness, towards Bruny Island.
The waters are dark, rolling like animals.
He flies on, looking out for a dinghy.
Jinjing flies fast. Perhaps he really is a drone robot.
Or perhaps it's the power of suggestion.
Whatever it is, he soon catches up with P. krameri.
P. krameri keeps flying, but turns his head slightly.
What are you doing here?
Arthur sent me, says Jinjing. I have a GPS function.
Pish! says P. krameri. ALL real birds do.
And a robot function, says Jinjing. You do your thing, I'll do mine.
I know exactly where Terence is, says P. krameri.
He'll have floated to a different position by now, says Jinjing.
I've taken that into account, says P. krameri.
They fly on together, both looking for Terence, but distracted by each other's presence.
Until they reach the coast of North Bruny.
O no! They've missed Terence. Embarrassing.
They will have to turn back.
Jinjing! Come down here, Arthur wants you.
Jinjing brightens, and flies along the pontoon across the deck of the Recherche and down to where Arthur is eating his second burger.
Not angry? asks Jinjing.
No, says Arthur.
I would waste away if you were angry, says Jinjing. How is your knee?
Knee? says Arthur. Okay.
He raises his knee, with it's fish-smelling bandage.
That will go nasty, says Jinjing.
Which could be an advantage, says Arthur.
Oh? says Jinjing. Well anyway, I'm sorry.
No need to be sorry, says Arthur. Just answer this. Are you a drone robot?
I haven't looked at my program, says Jinjing.
I think you are, says Arthur. And so you're the best one for the job.
What's the job? asks Jinjing.
GPS, says Arthur. Follow Terence in the dinghy. If he drifts too far off course, drop down and tell him.
That will upset him, says Jinjing.
Better he knows, says Arthur.
......
Jinjing flies off in the darkness, towards Bruny Island.
The waters are dark, rolling like animals.
He flies on, looking out for a dinghy.
Jinjing flies fast. Perhaps he really is a drone robot.
Or perhaps it's the power of suggestion.
Whatever it is, he soon catches up with P. krameri.
P. krameri keeps flying, but turns his head slightly.
What are you doing here?
Arthur sent me, says Jinjing. I have a GPS function.
Pish! says P. krameri. ALL real birds do.
And a robot function, says Jinjing. You do your thing, I'll do mine.
I know exactly where Terence is, says P. krameri.
He'll have floated to a different position by now, says Jinjing.
I've taken that into account, says P. krameri.
They fly on together, both looking for Terence, but distracted by each other's presence.
Until they reach the coast of North Bruny.
O no! They've missed Terence. Embarrassing.
They will have to turn back.
Wednesday, November 6, 2019
The Neck
P. krameri flies back to the Recherche, where Gaius is scanning the waters.
Any luck? asks Gaius.
I found him, says P. krameri. He's okay.
But where is he? asks Gaius.
Way out there in the dinghy, says P. krameri. We made a bold decision. We'll push on.
But you are not with him, says Gaius.
I came back to tell you, says P. krameri. We didn't want you to worry.
That's kind of you, says Gaius. By push on, I imagine you mean to float all the way to Bruny Island.
Yes, that's the plan, says P. krameri. I suppose we won't miss it.
You could easily miss it, says Gaius. It's small.
What's small? asks Captain Bruni, coming up from below.
Bruny Island, says Gaius. Terence is floating towards it, according to P. krameri. But I was just pointing out that it's small.
Not that small, says Captain Bruny. It's really two islands joined by a neck. At least he won't drift in between them.
That's a comfort, says P. krameri. So, where shall we meet you?
This could be a problem, says Gaius. We shall be going over by ferry. Then heading off on our bikes. If you aren't there when the ferry docks, someone will have to remain, or even start a search party.
Perhaps Katherine? suggests P. krameri.
She has plans to visit the Cheese Co. says Gaius.
What about the Cheese Co? asks Katherine, appearing on the pontoon, carrying a paper bag containing two large burgers.
Terence is planning to continue to Bruny Island in the dinghy, says Gaius. And P. krameri will be with him. But there is the difficulty of knowing where they'll fetch up. Besides, we all have our agendas, and time is pressing.
Hmm, says Katherine. Let me think. But first, I must give Arthur his burgers.
She goes down below.
Arthur, burgers. I bet you're starving. says Katherine.
Thanks, says Arthur. Did they find Terence?
No, there's a problem, says Katherine. He's heading to Bruny Island, but no one knows where he'll land.
Send Jinjing, says Arthur. The drone robot.
I'm not sure he's a drone robot, says Katherine. And he's gone to pieces. He's sniffling on the pontoon next to a mooring bollard.
I guarantee he'll do it, says Arthur.
Any luck? asks Gaius.
I found him, says P. krameri. He's okay.
But where is he? asks Gaius.
Way out there in the dinghy, says P. krameri. We made a bold decision. We'll push on.
But you are not with him, says Gaius.
I came back to tell you, says P. krameri. We didn't want you to worry.
That's kind of you, says Gaius. By push on, I imagine you mean to float all the way to Bruny Island.
Yes, that's the plan, says P. krameri. I suppose we won't miss it.
You could easily miss it, says Gaius. It's small.
What's small? asks Captain Bruni, coming up from below.
Bruny Island, says Gaius. Terence is floating towards it, according to P. krameri. But I was just pointing out that it's small.
Not that small, says Captain Bruny. It's really two islands joined by a neck. At least he won't drift in between them.
That's a comfort, says P. krameri. So, where shall we meet you?
This could be a problem, says Gaius. We shall be going over by ferry. Then heading off on our bikes. If you aren't there when the ferry docks, someone will have to remain, or even start a search party.
Perhaps Katherine? suggests P. krameri.
She has plans to visit the Cheese Co. says Gaius.
What about the Cheese Co? asks Katherine, appearing on the pontoon, carrying a paper bag containing two large burgers.
Terence is planning to continue to Bruny Island in the dinghy, says Gaius. And P. krameri will be with him. But there is the difficulty of knowing where they'll fetch up. Besides, we all have our agendas, and time is pressing.
Hmm, says Katherine. Let me think. But first, I must give Arthur his burgers.
She goes down below.
Arthur, burgers. I bet you're starving. says Katherine.
Thanks, says Arthur. Did they find Terence?
No, there's a problem, says Katherine. He's heading to Bruny Island, but no one knows where he'll land.
Send Jinjing, says Arthur. The drone robot.
I'm not sure he's a drone robot, says Katherine. And he's gone to pieces. He's sniffling on the pontoon next to a mooring bollard.
I guarantee he'll do it, says Arthur.
Tuesday, November 5, 2019
Imagining You Realistic
Lucky I'm the Captain, says Terence again.
No one answers.
Because, says Terence.
But no one asks Why?
Because I'm allowed to bump into things, says Terence.
Slap slap. Waves are getting larger.
He is floating out of the Oyster Cove Marina.
I'm going, says Terence. Goodbye.
The stars look down on Terence in the way that stars do ( that is, not actually looking).
What did I bring? asks Terence.
What? A steak knife. Nothing more.
Not even his Peruvian hat.
Clink! The last clink clinks faintly, far behind him, in the marina.
I need some advice, says Terence. What would Baby Bin Penguin do?
He imagines Baby Bin Penguin.
Asking him what to do.
Don't go far off, says Baby Bin Penguin.
Too late now, says Terence. I've gone far off already.
Turn around, says Baby Bin Penguin.
Can't, says Terence. I've only got a steak knife.
Ha ha, laughs Baby Bin Penguin. I know.
This is not like Baby Bin Penguin!
You're not Baby Bin Penguin, says Terence.
You imagined me, says Baby Bin Penguin. That means I am.
No, it means I'm LOST, says Terence. And I'm imagining bad things.
Imagine I'm P. krameri, says Baby Bin Penguin.
Okay, says Terence. What shall I do?
I just told you, says Baby Bin Penguin.
Not YOU! says Terence. I'm asking him now.
Slap slap. The waves are getting bigger.
A parakeet lands on the side of the dinghy.
Found you! says P. krameri. What do you think you're doing?
Imagining you, says Terence. And I'm doing a really good job. You look realistic.
I am realistic, says P. krameri. More realistic than Jinjing. He's just sitting on a pontoon next to a mooring bollard, snivelling.
That's a surprise, says Terence.
Not to me, says P. krameri. He's soft at heart. So, what shall we do about the fact that you recklessly cut yourself loose from the Recherche and floated off in the darkness with only a steak knife?
Turn me around, says Terence.
Or you could keep going, says P. krameri. In the morning you'll fetch up on Bruny Island. What an exploit!
I don't want to exploit, says Terence.
It's not always a verb, says P. krameri. It's a noun that means a fantastic adventure.
Are you coming with me? asks Terence.
No, says P. krameri. I'll go back and tell the others.Then I'll fly back and join you.
Okay, says Terence. But I'll still be the Captain.
Of course you will, says P. krameri.
Terence is happy with that.
No one answers.
Because, says Terence.
But no one asks Why?
Because I'm allowed to bump into things, says Terence.
Slap slap. Waves are getting larger.
He is floating out of the Oyster Cove Marina.
I'm going, says Terence. Goodbye.
The stars look down on Terence in the way that stars do ( that is, not actually looking).
What did I bring? asks Terence.
What? A steak knife. Nothing more.
Not even his Peruvian hat.
Clink! The last clink clinks faintly, far behind him, in the marina.
I need some advice, says Terence. What would Baby Bin Penguin do?
He imagines Baby Bin Penguin.
Asking him what to do.
Don't go far off, says Baby Bin Penguin.
Too late now, says Terence. I've gone far off already.
Turn around, says Baby Bin Penguin.
Can't, says Terence. I've only got a steak knife.
Ha ha, laughs Baby Bin Penguin. I know.
This is not like Baby Bin Penguin!
You're not Baby Bin Penguin, says Terence.
You imagined me, says Baby Bin Penguin. That means I am.
No, it means I'm LOST, says Terence. And I'm imagining bad things.
Imagine I'm P. krameri, says Baby Bin Penguin.
Okay, says Terence. What shall I do?
I just told you, says Baby Bin Penguin.
Not YOU! says Terence. I'm asking him now.
Slap slap. The waves are getting bigger.
A parakeet lands on the side of the dinghy.
Found you! says P. krameri. What do you think you're doing?
Imagining you, says Terence. And I'm doing a really good job. You look realistic.
I am realistic, says P. krameri. More realistic than Jinjing. He's just sitting on a pontoon next to a mooring bollard, snivelling.
That's a surprise, says Terence.
Not to me, says P. krameri. He's soft at heart. So, what shall we do about the fact that you recklessly cut yourself loose from the Recherche and floated off in the darkness with only a steak knife?
Turn me around, says Terence.
Or you could keep going, says P. krameri. In the morning you'll fetch up on Bruny Island. What an exploit!
I don't want to exploit, says Terence.
It's not always a verb, says P. krameri. It's a noun that means a fantastic adventure.
Are you coming with me? asks Terence.
No, says P. krameri. I'll go back and tell the others.Then I'll fly back and join you.
Okay, says Terence. But I'll still be the Captain.
Of course you will, says P. krameri.
Terence is happy with that.
Monday, November 4, 2019
Ting! Plonk!
Captain Bruni steps onto his vessel.
What's this! De Kermadec, are you wounded? You are missing a claw! What has happened! cries Captain Bruni.
Our game of pirates got out of hand, says Captain de Kermadec. It's my fault entirely.
Arthur! cries Katherine. Your knee! Captain Bruni, do you have any bandages?
And where is Terence? asks Gaius.
P. krameri's looking for him, says Arthur. Did you remember my burgers?
Damn! No, says Katherine. Forgot. I'll go back. Will they be closed yet?
Not yet, says Captain Bruni. You go. I'll find my old medicine chest. It's here somewhere.
He flings open his cupboards.
Sit down Arthur, says Gaius. Put your leg up.
Yes, put your leg up, says Captain de Kermadec. But first, give me my claw back.
Arthur returns it.
Will you attempt a reattachment? asks Gaius.
That won't be necessary, says Captain de Kermadec. I shall grow a new one. Meanwhile this severed one will be useful as a dental tool.
It'll STINK! says Captain Bruni.
Unfortunately, yes, says Captain de Kermadec. But it doesn't stink yet. How did your toot perform at dinner, Gaius?
Perfectly well, thank you, says Gaius.
Captain Bruni has found his medicine chest at last. He hands Arthur a fish-smelling bandage.
Thanks, says Arthur, winding it on.
I'm concerned about Terence, says Gaius. Did you say P. krameri was looking for him?
Yes, says Arthur. We know where he is, roughly.
And where is that? asks Gaius.
In a dinghy, says Arthur. Seems he cut himself loose.
Jumping jellyfish!! says Gaius. In the dark? What were you thinking?
At least he missed out on the bloodshed, says Arthur.
We must retrieve him, says Gaius. I'll get my torch, and scan the waters.
He rummages about in his back pack, for a torch.
....
Katherine is walking along the pontoon when she hears Jinjing sniffing.
He is sitting on a mooring bollard, staring into the darkness.
Why aren't you helping to find Terence? asks Katherine.
Why aren't you? asks Jinjing.
I will, when I get back with Arthur's burgers, says Katherine.
....
Terence is all alone in the dinghy.
It floats this way and that, in the dark.
Bump! Ting! Plonk!
Bump.
Lucky I'm the Captain, says Terence.
What's this! De Kermadec, are you wounded? You are missing a claw! What has happened! cries Captain Bruni.
Our game of pirates got out of hand, says Captain de Kermadec. It's my fault entirely.
Arthur! cries Katherine. Your knee! Captain Bruni, do you have any bandages?
And where is Terence? asks Gaius.
P. krameri's looking for him, says Arthur. Did you remember my burgers?
Damn! No, says Katherine. Forgot. I'll go back. Will they be closed yet?
Not yet, says Captain Bruni. You go. I'll find my old medicine chest. It's here somewhere.
He flings open his cupboards.
Sit down Arthur, says Gaius. Put your leg up.
Yes, put your leg up, says Captain de Kermadec. But first, give me my claw back.
Arthur returns it.
Will you attempt a reattachment? asks Gaius.
That won't be necessary, says Captain de Kermadec. I shall grow a new one. Meanwhile this severed one will be useful as a dental tool.
It'll STINK! says Captain Bruni.
Unfortunately, yes, says Captain de Kermadec. But it doesn't stink yet. How did your toot perform at dinner, Gaius?
Perfectly well, thank you, says Gaius.
Captain Bruni has found his medicine chest at last. He hands Arthur a fish-smelling bandage.
Thanks, says Arthur, winding it on.
I'm concerned about Terence, says Gaius. Did you say P. krameri was looking for him?
Yes, says Arthur. We know where he is, roughly.
And where is that? asks Gaius.
In a dinghy, says Arthur. Seems he cut himself loose.
Jumping jellyfish!! says Gaius. In the dark? What were you thinking?
At least he missed out on the bloodshed, says Arthur.
We must retrieve him, says Gaius. I'll get my torch, and scan the waters.
He rummages about in his back pack, for a torch.
....
Katherine is walking along the pontoon when she hears Jinjing sniffing.
He is sitting on a mooring bollard, staring into the darkness.
Why aren't you helping to find Terence? asks Katherine.
Why aren't you? asks Jinjing.
I will, when I get back with Arthur's burgers, says Katherine.
....
Terence is all alone in the dinghy.
It floats this way and that, in the dark.
Bump! Ting! Plonk!
Bump.
Lucky I'm the Captain, says Terence.
Sunday, November 3, 2019
Lost Pirate Baby
Terence is aft with P. kameri, crouched behind a pile of coiled ropes.
Captain de Kermadec searches for Terence.
Brandishing a steak knife.
Yo ho! says Captain de Kermadec to let Terence know he is near.
That's him! whispers Terence. He'll see us.
I'll startle him, says P. krameri. You scramble over.
Over what? asks Terence.
Over the back and down the ladder, whispers P. krameri.
Flahhh! he flies out.
Piratical curses! shouts Captain de Kermadec, backing away.
Multiple curses! He has backed into Arthur, who has come out from behind something dark.
Arthur doesn't intend to slice off the dominant claw of Captain de Kermadec with his steak knife.
But that is what happens.
Merde et diable! cries the Captain. I'm wounded!
Arthur picks up the claw.
Captain de Kermadec has dropped his steak knife, but he is quick witted.
He retrieves it with his other claw, and lunges.
Yeo-owch! He wounds Arthur, in the knee, removing his chocolate smeared scab.
We're even! cries Captain de Kermadec. You are bleeding! Blood brother! Now to find the pirate baby!
Yes, we should find him, says Arthur.
I know where he went, says P. krameri.
Filthy bird! cries Captain de Kermadec.
Take that back, says P. krameri.
Or what? Where is the pirate baby? snarls Captain de Kermadec.
He went down the ladder, says P. krameri. With his knife.
Arthur looks over the side and sees the empty ladder.
And a cut rope dangling.
Did we have a dinghy? asks Arthur.
O no! Terence has floated away.
But he can't have gone far. It must have only just happened.
I'll find him, says P. krameri. You guys clean up. Wash the steak knives. I see Captain Bruni approaching.
Captain Bruni is approaching, followed by Katherine and Gaius.
They will be surprised to learn what has happened,
Captain de Kermadec searches for Terence.
Brandishing a steak knife.
Yo ho! says Captain de Kermadec to let Terence know he is near.
That's him! whispers Terence. He'll see us.
I'll startle him, says P. krameri. You scramble over.
Over what? asks Terence.
Over the back and down the ladder, whispers P. krameri.
Flahhh! he flies out.
Piratical curses! shouts Captain de Kermadec, backing away.
Multiple curses! He has backed into Arthur, who has come out from behind something dark.
Arthur doesn't intend to slice off the dominant claw of Captain de Kermadec with his steak knife.
But that is what happens.
Merde et diable! cries the Captain. I'm wounded!
Arthur picks up the claw.
Captain de Kermadec has dropped his steak knife, but he is quick witted.
He retrieves it with his other claw, and lunges.
Yeo-owch! He wounds Arthur, in the knee, removing his chocolate smeared scab.
We're even! cries Captain de Kermadec. You are bleeding! Blood brother! Now to find the pirate baby!
Yes, we should find him, says Arthur.
I know where he went, says P. krameri.
Filthy bird! cries Captain de Kermadec.
Take that back, says P. krameri.
Or what? Where is the pirate baby? snarls Captain de Kermadec.
He went down the ladder, says P. krameri. With his knife.
Arthur looks over the side and sees the empty ladder.
And a cut rope dangling.
Did we have a dinghy? asks Arthur.
O no! Terence has floated away.
But he can't have gone far. It must have only just happened.
I'll find him, says P. krameri. You guys clean up. Wash the steak knives. I see Captain Bruni approaching.
Captain Bruni is approaching, followed by Katherine and Gaius.
They will be surprised to learn what has happened,
Saturday, November 2, 2019
Keep Your Knife Ready
What a wonderful view, says Katherine.
Even better in daylight, says Captain Bruni. You can see Bruny Island.
Gaius is munching his chips.
How's the toot? asks Katherine.
I'm managing, says Gaius. But I will try the erigeron remedy, when I locate some.
I'll keep an eye out for it, says Katherine. Although I won't be staying long on Bruny Island. Just long enough to visit the Cheese Co.
You appreciate our cheeses? says Captain Bruni.
Yes, says Katherine. I have plans to head back up the east coast via all the best known cheese shops.
Do you have your own cheese knife? asks Captain Bruni, forking a scallop.
I do, says Katherine. But it's not the one I came with. That one was confiscated, by a policeman.
Victor? says Gaius. He confiscated your cheese knife? Whatever for?
I'd used it on the Spirit of Tasmania to free Jinjing from the cage in which he was wrongfully imprisoned, says Katherine.
On what grounds? asks Captain Bruni.
Being a parrot, says Katherine.
So many injustices, sighs Captain Bruni.
Yes, say Gaius. But we generally avoid them. Have we all finished? I'd like an early night.
They pay up, and head back to the Recherche, where mayhem is already in progress.
It is bad mannered of Captain de Kermadec to play pirates on another captain's ship, but he's doing it anyway.
And Arthur ought to know better.
But he can't resist dangerous knives.
Captain de Kermadec has raided Captain Bruni's knife drawer and given everyone a steak knife. Even Terence.
Now what? asks Terence.
You go aft, says Captain Kermadec. And I'll spring out on you. Keep your knife ready.
Terence goes aft with P. kameri.
Captain de Kermadec has not given instructions to Arthur.
But that's fine with Arthur.
Captain de Kermadec had best keep his own steak knife ready.
Even better in daylight, says Captain Bruni. You can see Bruny Island.
Gaius is munching his chips.
How's the toot? asks Katherine.
I'm managing, says Gaius. But I will try the erigeron remedy, when I locate some.
I'll keep an eye out for it, says Katherine. Although I won't be staying long on Bruny Island. Just long enough to visit the Cheese Co.
You appreciate our cheeses? says Captain Bruni.
Yes, says Katherine. I have plans to head back up the east coast via all the best known cheese shops.
Do you have your own cheese knife? asks Captain Bruni, forking a scallop.
I do, says Katherine. But it's not the one I came with. That one was confiscated, by a policeman.
Victor? says Gaius. He confiscated your cheese knife? Whatever for?
I'd used it on the Spirit of Tasmania to free Jinjing from the cage in which he was wrongfully imprisoned, says Katherine.
On what grounds? asks Captain Bruni.
Being a parrot, says Katherine.
So many injustices, sighs Captain Bruni.
Yes, say Gaius. But we generally avoid them. Have we all finished? I'd like an early night.
They pay up, and head back to the Recherche, where mayhem is already in progress.
It is bad mannered of Captain de Kermadec to play pirates on another captain's ship, but he's doing it anyway.
And Arthur ought to know better.
But he can't resist dangerous knives.
Captain de Kermadec has raided Captain Bruni's knife drawer and given everyone a steak knife. Even Terence.
Now what? asks Terence.
You go aft, says Captain Kermadec. And I'll spring out on you. Keep your knife ready.
Terence goes aft with P. kameri.
Captain de Kermadec has not given instructions to Arthur.
But that's fine with Arthur.
Captain de Kermadec had best keep his own steak knife ready.
Friday, November 1, 2019
Hearties Cause Mayhem
I'm afraid I can't offer you dinner, says Captain Bruni. My cupboard is bare. But the Oyster Cove Inn will be open.
O yes, I'm starving, says Katherine.
Who's coming? asks Captain Bruni. Obviously not the parrots. They don't let birds in.
That's not fair, says Terence. If they can't go, I'm not going.
I'll stay here with Terence, says Captain de Kermadec. And the parrots. We can play pirates.
Yay! says Terence.
I don't know..... says Katherine. We only just met you.
Madam, says Captain de Kermadec, Captain Bruni will vouch for me.
I will, says Captain Bruni. I have known Captain de Kermadec since 1792.
But he wouldn't have been a lobster then, says Katherine.
True, says Captain Bruni. Neither would I. However, no doubt even you have changed a little, over the years. That is to say, you are still a most charming lady, in your green and black scarf.....
Thank you, says Katherine, but.... can we get Uber eats here?
No, says Captain Bruni.
I'll stay, if you bring me back a burger, says Arthur. Make that two.
No need for two, says Captain de Kermadec. I've already eaten. My wife made scallop pie.
....
So Captain Bruni, Katherine and Gaius head off to the Oyster Cove Inn, which overlooks the marina.
And Terence remains on the Recherche, with Arthur, Captain de Kermadec and the two parrots.
Not forgetting Dear Zebra, who has died.
Now let's play pirates, says Captain de Kermadec. Who knows what pirates do?
They cut things, says Terence.
That's one thing, says Captain de Kermadec.
They have parrots, says Jinjing.
And parakeets, says P. krameri.
No, not parakeets, says Jinjing.
Let's say they do, says Captain de Kermadec. Who'll have which parrot or parakeet?
Arthur will have me, says Jinjing.
Arthur had not particularly wanted a parrot.
But it looks like he's having Jinjing.
I'll have P. krameri, says Terence. P krameri, sit on my shoulder!
P. krameri obliges, although its hard to get a grip on Terence's shoulder.
We'll just pretend I've got a parrot, says Captain de Kermadec.
No! says Terence. You can have Dear Zebra. She might come alive if she's playing.
Is this Dear Zebra? asks Captain de Kermadec. She appears dead. May I uproot her?
Okay, says Terence.
Captain de Kermadec uproots Dear Zebra, and places her on his hat.
A captain's hat, with a tooth and crossbones logo and a spiky dead plant at an angle.
He looks fearsome.
Now, me hearties, let's cause mayhem!
O yes, I'm starving, says Katherine.
Who's coming? asks Captain Bruni. Obviously not the parrots. They don't let birds in.
That's not fair, says Terence. If they can't go, I'm not going.
I'll stay here with Terence, says Captain de Kermadec. And the parrots. We can play pirates.
Yay! says Terence.
I don't know..... says Katherine. We only just met you.
Madam, says Captain de Kermadec, Captain Bruni will vouch for me.
I will, says Captain Bruni. I have known Captain de Kermadec since 1792.
But he wouldn't have been a lobster then, says Katherine.
True, says Captain Bruni. Neither would I. However, no doubt even you have changed a little, over the years. That is to say, you are still a most charming lady, in your green and black scarf.....
Thank you, says Katherine, but.... can we get Uber eats here?
No, says Captain Bruni.
I'll stay, if you bring me back a burger, says Arthur. Make that two.
No need for two, says Captain de Kermadec. I've already eaten. My wife made scallop pie.
....
So Captain Bruni, Katherine and Gaius head off to the Oyster Cove Inn, which overlooks the marina.
And Terence remains on the Recherche, with Arthur, Captain de Kermadec and the two parrots.
Not forgetting Dear Zebra, who has died.
Now let's play pirates, says Captain de Kermadec. Who knows what pirates do?
They cut things, says Terence.
That's one thing, says Captain de Kermadec.
They have parrots, says Jinjing.
And parakeets, says P. krameri.
No, not parakeets, says Jinjing.
Let's say they do, says Captain de Kermadec. Who'll have which parrot or parakeet?
Arthur will have me, says Jinjing.
Arthur had not particularly wanted a parrot.
But it looks like he's having Jinjing.
I'll have P. krameri, says Terence. P krameri, sit on my shoulder!
P. krameri obliges, although its hard to get a grip on Terence's shoulder.
We'll just pretend I've got a parrot, says Captain de Kermadec.
No! says Terence. You can have Dear Zebra. She might come alive if she's playing.
Is this Dear Zebra? asks Captain de Kermadec. She appears dead. May I uproot her?
Okay, says Terence.
Captain de Kermadec uproots Dear Zebra, and places her on his hat.
A captain's hat, with a tooth and crossbones logo and a spiky dead plant at an angle.
He looks fearsome.
Now, me hearties, let's cause mayhem!
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