Wednesday, August 20, 2014

The Meaning Means What It Means.

We should not expect to learn the meaning of life from an orange. Let alone five discarded pips.

Yet we have learned something. Pips have a sense of entitlement, and may be disappointed.

We would do better to follow the philosophers to Bar Electricitat.

David Hume, Schopenhauer, Maria Goyri and Ramon de Menendez Pidal have found a table, and ordered sea snails with tomato-smeared bread.

Perhaps this will get them talking about things that matter.

I have never had sea snails, says David. Land snails, yes.

Sea snails are nicer, says Maria Goyri. No slime.

That is because in the ocean they don't need it, says Ramon de Menendez. Land snails produce slime to enable them to move easily.

You would get on well with our old friend Gaius, says David. He is a natural historian. Gaius Plinius Secundus.

Is he here for the conference? asks Maria Goyri.

No, says Schopenhauer. When the Tour de France finished he went home with Baby Pierre.

His son? asks Maria Goyri.

No, Baby Pierre is a pebble, says Schopenhauer.

An inanimate object, says Ramon. With a child's name. That is fascinating.

He is not inanimate, says David. He was the bane of the Tour. With his silly little green bicycle.

I remember now, says Maria Goyri. Ramon, do you remember? There was talk of an animate pebble. The Green Flash. Of course we didn't believe it.

Of course we didn't, says Ramon. Do you mean to say you actually saw it?

We certainly did, says Schopenhauer. And so did the riders who crashed.

Not Alberto, says Maria Goyri.

Even Alberto, says David.

You shock me, says Maria Goyri. But I must believe you, as fellow philosophers. It begs the question:

WHAT IS THE MEANING OF LIFE?

At last!

The sea snails are brought to the table, in bowls of hot steaming liquid.

And next, a plate of tomato smeared bread.

Indeed, says David. But first we must examine the meaning of the question. What does meaning mean?

It means what one means, says Ramon.

David looks doubtful. It's not the usual answer.

He stabs at a snail with a toothpick.

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