The Birth Of Team Claw

Baby Pierre looks at Third Sister.

She doesn't have legs. But she has done a weird thing with her tail end that looks promising.

How do you do that? asks Baby Pierre.

I come from a talented family, says Third Sister. My mother is Tangerine, the last  Barbados racer, my dad is Masteego. That means he climbs trees.

Cool, says Baby Pierre. Can you ride a bicycle?

Sure, says Third Sister.

Try mine, says Ouvert. He won't let you ride his.

Why? asks Third Sister.

Come and see it, says Baby Pierre.

They go outside, to the garden shed.

Oh wow! says Third Sister. Green wheels!

Fluoro-elastane, says Baby Pierre. Special o-rings.

For a wanker, says Ouvert. This is my bike. Get on.

Third Sister would like to get on the bike with the o-rings, but she does as she's told.

This goes down well with the Team Captain.

She twin loops her tail and hops onto Ouvert's tiny bicycle.

She zooms off round the back garden.

Not bad, says Ouvert.

Not bad, agrees Baby Pierre. Okay, you're in Team Claw. We just need to get you a bicycle.

And some bike knicks, and some Vantablack coating, says Third Sister. Don't forget that.

Let's go, says Baby Pierre. Stay on Ouvert's bike. We'll ride into Norwood.

What about me? asks Ouvert.

Get on behind me, says Third Sister.

I'll have to look at your bum, says Ouvert.

That's okay. Pretend I've got bike knicks on, says Third Sister.

What colour are they? asks Ouvert.

Black, says Third Sister.

They head down the side path, and out onto the road.

Two pebbles and a tiny looped snake on two miniscule bicycles.

The birth of Team Claw.

.......

At the Bike Shop, in Norwood.

Hey guys, says Roland. What can I do for you?

We need a bike to fit this girl, says Baby Pierre, and some bike knicks.

Easy done, says Roland. As long as she doesn't want fluoro-elastane o-rings.

She doesn't , says Baby Pierre. We can't afford them.

Try this one, then, says Roland. It looks the right size.

It's perfect, says Third Sister. Black is my favourite colour. And I want black knicks as well.

How do you...? begins Roland. But it seems a rude question to finish.

She double loops her tail, says Ouvert. Show him, Third Sister.

Third Sister asks if there's a change room.

There is. She goes into the change room with three pairs of black knicks to try on.

Do you have any Vantablack coating? asks Baby Pierre

Vantablack coating! says Roland. What for?

Ageless asked me to get some, says Baby Pierre. For the bike wheels. Kobo says it makes them invisible.

Depends, says Roland. It only makes them invisible against a Vantablack background. It would be pretty cool though.

Have you got some? asks Ouvert.

I can get some, says Roland. But it's expensive. It's an ultrablack, made of light-trapping carbon nano tubes. Absorbs 99.965 per cent of the visible light that reaches its surface.

Da-daah! says Third Sister. How do I look, boys?

See, says Roland. If she had those knicks on and she was on that bike, and the wheels were Vantablack coated, there's not much you'd see of her. Even less, with the right back ground.

That was not quite the effect that Third Sister had hoped for.