The Persistence Of Sharks

Why the face? says Sweezus. You don't think we've been inventive?

A financial arrangement with sharks? says Wittgenstein. No matter how inventive, there's bound to be a lack of connection. 

There was, says Arthur. 

Yeah there was, says Sweezus. 

And how would you have shared out the profits? asks Wittgenstein.

There were no profits, says Sweezus.

But the sharks continue to pursue you, says Wittgenstein. Is that what you're saying?

Looks like it, says Sweezus. 

You need to come to some agreement, says Wittgenstein.

Another one, says Sweezus.

One that can't fail, says Wittgenstein.

Yeah right, says Sweezus. 

I'd ask Gaius, says Wittgenstein. He must know sharks.

By now they have reached the campsite.

I'll take the Mazda, says Wittgenstein. You are both sandy.

Okay, says Sweezus. If you see Gaius and Terence on the road, tell them we're coming.

Will do, says Wittgenstein.

He drives off.

Five minutes down the road he spots Gaius and Terence, sitting under a swamp oak.

He pulls up beside them. Gets out.

At last! says Terence. We've been sitting here for EVER!

Some of us are not keen on walking, says Gaius.

Surely not you, says Wittgenstein. And not the parrot. That leaves Terence.

And Quiet-Tartus, says Terence. 

Don't blame me, says Quiet-Tartus.

I'm not blaming anyone, says Wittgenstein. Sweezus and Arthur will be along in a minute, in the camper.

Excellent news, says Gaius. Have they got surfing out of their system?

I think not, says Wittgenstein. But they do have a problem which I've suggested you might help them solve.

Spill the beans, says Gaius. 

It concerns sharks, says Wittgenstein. They are being pursued by them.

In the camper? says Gaius. 

In the ocean, says Wittgenstein.

Then I suggest they stay out of the ocean, says Gaius. 

That won't please them, says Wittgenstein. But you, of all people, know sharks. Perhaps you can suggest some way they might come to an amicable arrangement.

A competition! says Terence.

No, says Gaius. Not a competition. What type of sharks are they?

I don't know, says Wittgenstein. Persistent.

Luckily, the camper appears in the distance.

So Gaius can ask them himself.