Good Friday

You've brought far too much chocolate, said Marie. And I don't see a sleeping bag. What are you going to do if we decide to camp out?

Don't worry about me, said Jesus. I've got this sheet.

And he pulled a grubby white sheet from the bottom of his pack.

That won't keep you very warm, said Marie.

Never mind, said Jesus. Have a chocolate.

No thanks. said Marie. No chocolate till Sunday.

What? said Jesus.

Don't you know the rule? aked Belle et Bonne.

No, this is the first I've heard of it, said Jesus.

I thought you of all people would know that rule, said Belle et Bonne. You surprise me. You don't seem very religious.

Religious! Why should I be religious? scoffed Jesus.

Yes Belle, said Marie. Jesus doesn't need to be religious. And neither are we religious, she added.

Then you ought to have a chocolate, said Jesus.

No thanks, said Marie. There are other reasons not to eat chocolate.

They cycled all afternoon along the coast road beside the wind-tossed sea. They bought pizzas for dinner and ate them under a pine tree.

Let's sleep under this tree tonight, said Belle et Bonne. It doesn't look like it'll rain.

Alright, said Marie, and Jesus agreed.

They lay side by side looking up at the clouds and the stars through the pine branches, Jesus in the middle because he was cold.

Jesus got out his Blackberry. The clouds look like blue white and black chrysanthemums, he said.

Are you tweeting that? asked Belle et Bonne.

Yes, replied Jesus.

It's nice, said Marie. Goodnight.

Goodnight, said Jesus, pulling out another block of chocolate.

To keep me warm, he said.

Sure, said Belle et Bonne. Goodnight Jesus. Sleep well. Good Friday tomorrow.

See if I care, said Jesus.

Following Jesus

Jesus was sad. His favourite character had been killed off in a blog that he followed.

Poor Frog, thought Jesus. What a way to go. Then he brightened. Soon it would be Easter. Not that he liked Easter. But this year he had plans.

He had recently joined a book club where he had met Marie. Marie was co-editor of a cycling magazine, and she had invited him to join her on an Easter cycling tour, with her friend Belle et Bonne. They were planning to set off on Thursday.

I'd better call her, thought Jesus. I need to know what to bring.

Hi Marie, he said, when she answered.

What's up? said Marie. Hey, are you okay? You sound a bit flat.

Yeah, I'm okay, said Jesus. Just peed off about Frog.

Me too, said Marie. He was the best one in it. I loved him when he stuck up for himself at the science event. I carry within me the seeds of my own propagation. Classic!

Yeah, classic, said Jesus. Anyway, what do I have to bring on Thursday?

Just your bike, said Marie. And your helmet, and a warm jacket in case it turns cold.

And my Blackberry, said Jesus. I'll be tweeting our trip.

Oh will you? said Belle et Bonne. So you have a Twitter account?

Yep! It's pretty new.

What are you called? asked Marie

Don't laugh, said Jesus.

I won't, said Marie.

Sweezus, said Jesus.

Cool, said Marie. You got that from Baby Pierre. What do you tweet about, mainly?

Follow me and you'll see, said Jesus.