The Fossilised Clam Begs to Differ

mmmmmso that's what he thinks does he. ppprp. he'd rather be a fossilised clammmmm, well i'm a fossilised clam.

let me tell you a bit about life as a fossilised clam mister lobster, it is hard and long and dull the life of a fossilised clammm.

i was once a fresh soft squishy clammm although i hardly rememmmmber. i lived inside my clammm shell it was made of clammshell. it was light.

i rolled around contentedly on the ocean floor doing what clammmmms do i can't even remmmmember what that was but i know things used to happen.

and then one day i found myself emmmbedded in a bed of silt i couldn't get free of the silt it was so heavy it got heavier and heavier. over centuries and eons it turned to stone under the sea.

i was really bored you just try it sommmmetimmmme mister lobster.

my shell protected me but i had zilch to eat. ppprp. and i couldn't mmmove.

it was a very long time before i noticed something happening to my shell bit by bit it was mmmmineralising yes that was what it did.

and as it mmmineralised it got heavier and heavier i suppose you think i wouldn't notice embedded in the rock but let me tell you yes i did. my optimistic view of life diminished.

time passes very slowly when you are a fossil, i would give anything to have your life mister lobster i would not fear a predator i would rejoice to think that i was soft enough to eat i would not fear the transmmmmogrifying fire. ppprp.