Confessions

Surely your mother did not say anything so vulgar! said Pliny sternly. Not to mention that she seems to have spoken uncharacteristically in rhyme.

Of course she didn't, Pliny. I just couldn't resist it, and it serves you right for boasting that you're friends with Coleridge. I bet you only googled him. I bet you're only friends with him the same way I could say that I'm friends with Jean-Jacques Rousseau.

Oh? And in what way are you friends with him? asked Pliny, with a sniff.

I'm reading about him. I just finished Rousseau's Dog. Now I'm reading his Confessions. I feel I know him very well indeed.

Imagine that, said Pliny. I myself am following him on Twitter. He appears to be doing very well in the Tour de France.

But Pliny, he's a philosopher.

Indeed he is, and a very witty one. Only this morning he tweeted this gem: Man is born free but is everywhere in chains. A reference to his bicycle, do you see?