The Puzzling Names of Private Parts

Great Jupiter! said Gaius. Don't tell me YOU have read the story of the porter!

No, said Lavender, I haven't, but Kobo said to tell Ageless to be sure to read it.

I can't think why, said Gaius. It's vulgar.

Why is it vulgar? asked Lavender. And why wouldn't Ageless like it?

He would like it, said Gaius. But I can't think why Kobo would recommend it.

Tell us the story, Gaius, said Ouvert. Then we'll know.

Certainly not, said Gaius. Suffice to say the three ladies in the story tease the porter.

Oh HOW? said Lavender. I LOVE teasing!

How can I put it nicely? said Gaius. They take a bath, and then ask him if he can name their private parts.

What are private parts? asked Lavender.

I forgot you didn't have any, said Gaius. Never mind.

I have, said Ouvert. I have private parts.

No you don't, said Lavender. You're completely open. Everyone can see right through you if they like.

Well you don't know everything, said Ouvert, huffily.

But it was true, he had no private parts.

Lavender was still musing on the subject.

What were they called, the private parts? she asked. Or is it vulgar?

The names the ladies give them are not exactly vulgar, said Gaius. In fact they are quite puzzling.

Arthur had been listening in silence. He really didn't want to know what names the ladies had for their private parts. He didn't think they would be puzzling.

He decided to go and find the Museum. Perhaps he'd be the first to see the Varan's Claw.