Epicurean With A Touch Of The Erotic

Gaius sinks into a chair.

Why did no one remind me? says Gaius. Arthur?

Don't worry, says Arthur. I'm not worried.

Arthur, says Belle et Bonne, do you know something? When did you last see Rosamunda?

Arthur thinks. It was when she walked off without him to find the shops. And wasn't she being followed by that weird guy who she'd dudded on the subway?

Even Arthur knows better than to make this public.

Last Tuesday, says Arthur. She went shopping.

And that was it? says Belle et Bonne. You didn't see her again? And then you left China without her? I don't believe it!

This isn't going well. Arthur feels obliged to make it go a little better.

She's coming on a later flight, says Arthur.

He feels that this is actually quite likely. Unless she has been murdered or detained.

The conversation turns to other topics.

Now that's cleared up, says Gaius, let's get on to more important matters. Sweezus, have you sent off that report?

What report? says Sweezus. I've actually been heaps busy.......

The report to the Copper Coast Mayor, says Gaius. About the success of my my trip to Turkey with the Twitcher in order to widen the cuttlefish gene pool.

I would've finished it, says Sweezus, but ....

But what? says Gaius.

But for what Arthur told me, says Sweezus. You left the Twitcher in Dubai and he died there. I wasn't sure how to pitch it as a success.

I thought you had completed a creative writing course, says Gaius, crossly.

Yeah, says Sweezus, but ...... there's something else. I'm up to here in paperwork. I'm starting up my own business.

Isn't it exciting! says Belle et Bonne.

What's the business? says Arthur. Ghost writing?

Why did you say that? says Sweezus. Anyway it's not that sort of business. It's not literary. Guess what it is?

Stop wasting time and tell us, says Gaius.

I'm buying a pop-up food van, says Sweezus. It's the coolest thing. What you do is, you drive around the city and sell food to dudes at lunch time.

What do you think? says Belle et Bonne. It's his own idea.

What kind of food? says Arthur.

Dunno yet, says Sweezus. Something easy. Something I can cook. Something no one else is selling. It's mega competitive. Marketing's the key......

Isn't that good? says Belle et Bonne. Marketing's the key.

It would be better if he knew what he was cooking, says Arthur.

Cuttlefish! says Gaius. There's an idea you can have for nothing. It just came into my head.

Yeah? says Sweezus. How d'you cook 'em?

Cut their legs off below the eyes, says Gaius. Cut out the little beak. Remove the unpalatable filling from the head compartment. Take out the cuttlebone and fry for one or two minutes, but no longer. Keep them tender.

Awesome! says Sweezus. Too easy! Gaius you're a genius. I'll call it....... Sweezies Cuttlies.

Good name, says Arthur. Epicurean with a touch of the erotic.