Early morning: Belle is asleep. Terence is watching tv.
Farky-Om-Farky is picking his omniscient teeth.
Something rustles behind the curtains......
........
Stage Five begins: The skies are cloudy, and spotted with rain. It is colder.
Team Condor is riding up near the front of the peloton.
Gaius: People keep asking me questions.
Sweezus: What sort of questions?
Gaius: About Farky. They think he has special powers.
Sweezus: I wish.
Arthur: But if they they think so, he could be kidnapped.
Sweezus: Belle's looking after him.
Pablo: No she isn't.
Belle rides up on a motor cycle. Behind her sits Terence, holding a card.
Belle: Hi guys! How's it going?
Sweezus: What's this? Got a job now?
Belle: Yes, and Terence is helping.
Terence: See this card? It's for numbers.
Arthur: Time gaps?
Terence: How should I know?
Belle: Yes it is, Terence. Remember? When I get a message, I'll tell you. And you write it down on the card with your crayon. Then we show it to all the riders.
Sweezus: Good luck with that. And where's Farky?
Belle: As if he could ride on a motor bike!
Terence: AND... he's been kidnapped!
Belle: I'm sure he hasn't.
Terence: He was there. Then he wasn't.
Pablo: He HAS been kidnapped! That's how it happens.
Belle: He'll turn up. He can look after himself.
Sweezus: But you were supposed....
Belle: To tell you the truth, I'm SICK of looking after him. He's a know-all.
Terence: Yes, he thinks he knows EVERYTHING. He says You're going to be sad now, then he bites you......
Belle: Not you, Terence. Your parrot.
Arthur: Classic bully.
Pablo: Good riddance.
Gaius: Pity. I was going to ask him a question.
Belle rides off with Terence, in a puff of black fumes.
Team Philosophe rides up alongside.
I've got a question, says Vello. What's going on? That's my question.
Farky's been kidnapped, says Sweezus.
Or murdered, says Arthur.
Good, says Vello. That's one problem out of the way.
I say, Vello, says David. That's a bit callous. He wasn't our problem.
Superstition and mumbo jumbo is always my problem, says Vello. No, my question is: Why are there two of you, Gaius?
Two of me? says Gaius. And you say you reject mumbo jumbo?
Everyone's seen you, says Vello. Darting here and there, beeping.
I never beep, says Gaius. Proof positive, right there.
Beep beep! Virtual Gaius speeds by, on Schopenhauer's bike.
There you are! says Vello. Now deny it!
Oh that, says Gaius. I can explain.
.......
But enough of their troubles.
Nacer Bouhanni has crashed and is out of the race.
The road is slippery. Later, there is a pile up.
But everyone gets up again.
Each one of the fallen-and-risen pays silent respect to Farky.
Farky, who, rumour has it, has been kidnapped.
Who would do this?
Who?
Andre Greipel, who wins the stage in front of Peter Sagan?
Tony Martin, who retains the yellow jersey?
Surfing-With-Whales, his former master?
Mark Cavendish? Nairo Quintana?
Chris Froome?
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment