Getting Away With A Claw

Holly comes back from seeing the captain.

You can sit down again, she says. Nothing will happen. You'll escape with a warning.

What is the warning? asks Gaius.

Where do I start? says Holly. Firstly you stowed a child in an overhead locker.

He isn't a child, says Gaius. He's a representation.

That's right says Terence. I represent this parrot.

(Warning: This is not Christian doctrine).

Secondly, says Holly. By placing your luggage incorrectly, a breakage has occurred, of the child's cement finger.

Which proves my point, says Gaius. He is not a human person.

You needn't attempt to refute the accusations, says Holly. I told you, it's a warning.

My parrot didn't have a warning, says Terence.

Holly looks down at baby B-B, who is on Dries' lap, getting trauma counselling.

Thirdly, says Holly, you have carried an undeclared bird onto a plane. These are all serious offences, punishable by fines or imprisonment. However it is almost Christmas, and the captain is in a good mood. He thought the incident was funny. And he would like to meet you at the end of the flight to have his photo taken with the little baby Jesus.

Yee-ha! says Terence. And my parrot?

We'll see, says Holly. Now, wait here while I fetch the first aid kit. Your parrot is bleeding.

She goes off to fetch a first aid kit. She comes back.

There is really no need, says Gaius. I have glue packed somewhere.

No, says Holly. Let me bandage the parrot. Hm, it doesn't look like a real parrot.

All my parrots don't, says Terence. How will you stick his claw on?

I can't, says Holly. He will have to learn to get by without it. Perhaps he should have physio.

I should have physio, says Terence. I have to get by without my finger.

No, you don't, Terence, says Dries. And I want you to think about the effect of what you're saying on baby B-B.

Terence is stung. He has not thought about the effect of what he is saying on baby B-B.

What is it?

He looks at his best friend, the now clawless (on one foot) baby B-B.

He can have my finger, says Terence. And I'll have his claw. Would you like that, blood-brother?

His blood-brother is not sure he would like a cement finger.

But Terence is suddenly one hundred percent certain that he would like a claw.

.......

The flight has landed.

The captain is waiting at the exit.

Holly takes a photo of the captain with Terence.

The captain, unsure of the etiquette, (ought one to manhandle a baby Jesus?), has squatted to be on a level with Terence. Terence is sticking up his new claw in what looks like ( but isn't ) a blessing. For legal reasons, baby B-B is not in the photo at all.