Two Tales Of Two Wazzos

Gaius raises his arms as the gendarme bursts into the apartment.

The gendarme sniffs the air.

Je cherche la source de l'odeur, says the gendarme.

We seem to have run out of bathroom deodoriser, says Carl Linnaeus. And in any case.....it's not your business. Who are you?

Je m'appelle Pierre, says the gendarme.  Branche spéciale. Eh voila! J'ai succedé d'apprendre deux oiseaux!

Wazzos? says Terence.

Two birds, whispers David. He thinks he has apprehended two birds.

Not real ones, says Pierre. It is merely a saying. To kill two wazzos, with one Pierre.

Very funny, says David. And which of us are they?

This one, says Pierre, pointing at Vello, clutching the stick with the incriminating ember.

And this one, adds Pierre, glaring at Carl, who is dressed like a Sami, and holding a magical drum.

I admit it looks rather suspicious, says Gaius, but I can vouch for all of my friends here.

That is not enough, says Pierre. This one has terrorized the dignitaries and honoured guests of Paris COP21 with a burning coal stick.

And still would be! cries Vello. But the ringleaders have already  departed.

It is only your own Prime Minister you should be poking, says Pierre. Not other people's.

Vello just got carried away, says David. He won't do it again. I'm dousing his coal in the toilet.

He seizes the stick and the burning ember and heads for the toilet.

Give it a minute, says Carl.

.........

It is night time when Mango flies over Narrandera.

Flap...flap...flap

She has been flying for days now, and feels a bit tired.

She drops down in the Memorial Gardens, and comes to rest on a fountain.

Baby B-B wakes up in his leather contraption, hearing the trickle of water.

Sometimes dreams overlap us.

Sorry, Mango, says baby B-B.

What for dear? asks Mango.

Didn't I pee?

No dear, you didn't, this is a fountain. Were you dreaming?

Yes, I was dreaming of mother.

What is he like, your mother? I have not met him.

He has blue eyes and unruly hair.

Joshy has, too. He is like my mother.

But is Joshy your mother?

No. Just LIKE my mother. What do you think of the fountain?

Baby B-B has a look. It is very ornate, and appears to be made of ceramic.

It's the Hankinson Royal Doulton fountain, says Mango. There are only two in the world.

Where are dey? asks baby B-B.

One of them is right here! says Mango. Isn't that lucky.

Baby B-B can't help but wonder where the other one* might be.

* answer: Pakistan.

(not many people know that)